Author. Editor & writing instructor for the Veterans Writing Project. Navy vet. Wife, mom. Opinions are my own & I have plenty of ‘em. She/her. Standing w/🇺🇦.
Don’t call VP Harris “Kamala.” She’s “Vice President Harris” unless you’re her personal friend. She earned the title & deserves the respect. Historically, calling Black women by 1st names instead of the honorific + surname is a deliberate display of disrespect. Knock it off.
Some thoughts on the damage to or sinking of RF Ship Moskva. A 🧵.
The crew of Moskva were naval combatants engaged in a war of aggression against a peaceful nation. Congratulations are due to the Ukrainian coastal defense forces on successful elimination of a major target. 1/
@anneapplebaum
All this. But, please, “incredibly brave men AND WOMEN.” Some 50,000 brave women make up more than 1/5 of Ukraine’s armed forces. They, too, endure bombardment and artillery fire.
@JDVance1
Oh, FFS, J.D. What an asinine take. Many of the enlisted sailors & Marines I served alongside during my 20-year naval career had college degrees, too, from A.S. to Ph.D. Utterly disingenuous anti-elitism, too, since you went to Yale. But do go on.
Tracing members of a group of 200 enslaved people through deed records of a wealthy white family in Southside VA. It's one thing to read about chattel slavery in secondary sources, however excellent, & another entirely to track specific people in a set of primary sources. 1/
compared to what the peaceful citizens of Ukraine have endured at the hands of Russian soldiers.
But I also heard the voices of Moskva's crew today. And the voice of the sea, reminding that something is bigger than us all, something that does not recognize friend or foe. 13/
@mm_kaufman
From my experience w/my own dad, who got a GED in the Navy & used his GI Bill for flight lessons: That rant is probably not about you at all, and NOT b/c he thinks your life is "directionless." He's probably displacing his own feelings about not finishing college & 1/
There is a maritime tradition that dolphins are the souls of sailors lost at sea. When Kursk's reactor compartment came to the surface, a pod of dolphins came with it. They stayed w/the reactor compartment all the way up the river & right to the pier in Murmansk. 11/
"To the ladies" (men drink standing, ladies drink to the bottom) & "To those lost at sea."
I'm not fluent in maritime law, but there is a longstanding tradition that there is a duty to rescue even enemy combatants who are adrift at sea if they cease hostile actions. 3/
to offer assistance w/SAR efforts. For 4 days, while we hardly slept & stood by to send the necessary messages to start SAR efforts, we watched in increasing horror while the Russian gov't fumbled around & refused all offers of help. 7/
I sometimes hear the crew of Kursk in my dreams. Tapping on the hull, hoping someone would hear them. Speaking to me in bubbles of the air that eventually ran out on them.
I'm not sorry that the Ukrainians damaged or sank Moskva. What the Russian sailors endured is nothing 12/
If you've served aboard ship, you know what fire at sea means. You know what flooding means. You know you might be the person who has to dog the hatch to preserve watertight integrity of the ship, knowing that some of your shipmates will perish as a result. 4/
Those things are the same on every ship. No matter what flag it flies.
I can't speak for every sailor, but I think most of us know that the sea is bigger than us all. In storms, & when a ship is on fire or taking on water, the sea does not discriminate between friend & foe. 5/
I was assigned to the US embassy in Moscow in 2000 when a torpedo exploded on the Russian submarine Kursk & sank. More than 20 members of the crew survived, trapped 350 feet below the surface. We & allies w/rescue equipment immediately reached out to Russia's MoD 6/
When I joined the USN, I trained to enable US & NATO naval forces to sink Soviet ships & subs, & to shoot down their aircraft.
And when I was an asst naval attaché in Moscow, at diplomatic events w/our Russian counterparts I always drank exactly 2 of the traditional toasts: 2/
All hands—118 souls—were lost.
A year later, the Swedish naval attaché & I attended the panakhida, the Orthodox memorial service, for those lost aboard Kursk. Afterward we met with some of the families. The fathers of some of those lost had been submariners. They knew 8/
exactly what their sons had endured. They didn't want the bodies retrieved: "The sea is a fitting grave for a sailor," one told me. He knew what the condition of the remains would've been after a few days, weeks, months. 9/
@meaganmday
If you really want a sauna hat, order from the St. Petersburg store in Brighton Beach. They have a good selection & can probably order what they don’t have in stock.
He also told me some of the family members had gone out on the escort ship to lay a wreath at the site of the sinking when the reactor compartment was raised & towed back to Murmansk. 10/
@mm_kaufman
dissatisfaction w/the direction he wishes he'd had the sense to take with his OWN life.
Not long after I graduated w/my BA, Dad was told he'd hit a glass ceiling & was denied a promotion into middle management b/c he didn't finish college. His supervisor told him it was b/c, 2/
@mm_kaufman
and he absolutely does NOT get to be the arbiter of whether or not you have succeeded. I hope he finds a way to decenter his own feelings about his life so he can celebrate the wonderful things you're doing w/yours. Warmest wishes for healing. 7/end
Yeah. Mistakes happen in war, but I’m tossing the BS flag on this one. I’ve worked w/IDF officers, & the IDF is WAY too competent to “accidentally” hit an NGO convoy that had shared movement intentions & was clearly marked. 1/
Mistakes happen in war, but it’s hard to call 3 strikes happening over multiple kilometers—particularly after WCK disclosed their movements to the Israeli military prior to departure—a “tragic accident”
This was either a massive breakdown in communication, or it was intentional.
If your response to the deaths of Marines (and soldier and sailor) in Kabul was something like “Til Valhalla, brothers,” check your assumptions from now on. Two of the Marines killed were women. Semper fi, sisters. I’ll see you standing guard at the pearly gates someday.
@mm_kaufman
The hurt you're feeling is real and valid. But what your father said to you absolutely is NOT. It sounds like you're making the world your oyster, in YOUR way. You don't owe him anything but a sincere "Thank you" for any help he provided toward your education— 6/
If you’re a woman & were able to continue your military career after becoming pregnant, here’s the trailblazer who made it possible. She will be interred at Arlington on Monday w/full military honors.
@mm_kaufman
HE deserved the diploma. (Spoiler: he didn't "pay for" my degree. I had max student loans, work-study, & scholarships. Family contribution covered a small fraction of the bill. Oh, and I EARNED my degree w/hard work & study!) 4/
@cenglishross
@lordgarmad0n
@ffmichelle
Oh—so THAT’s what they were doing down there! I could feel them jostling around in my abdomen. Like a shoving match. Was back at work full time 5 weeks later, had to pass the Navy physical fitness test after 6mos. The curl-ups were terrifying—was afraid I might pop open again.
Active duty folks: This is a good time to check in w/your personnel of Middle Eastern & South Asian heritage. Since the US & Iran are making ugly faces at each other & spoiling for a fight, your troops may be getting harassed behind the scenes— 1/
@mm_kaufman
He did the same to my sister a couple of years later, & my folks gave her NOTHING after her sophomore year. She cleaned office buildings in NYC at night to pay her "family contribution." It enraged both Sis' & me for years. So hurtful. So diminishing & dismissive. 5/
@SGMtheMan1
This is coded language for talking about abortion. Stop. If I get an abortion it’s not going to infect you, your elderly mother, or a dedicated health care professional putting her life on the line every day in a COVID ward. The hypocrisy is not where you think it is.
I seldom say anything publicly about the Israel-Palestine situation because of the demands from good people on both sides of the issue for unquestioning adherence to some kind of ideological purity that 1/
In light of what is happening to
@PatDonahoeArmy
right now: a little 🧵 on what Inspectors General do in “seniors cases,” for folks who have never had contact w/service-level Inspectors General. My twilight tour was 3 1/2 years at the Office of the Naval Inspector General. 1/
A thread on an elephant in a room: abortion & the military. Discussed gingerly in closed military women’s forums, but I haven’t seen it out on Twitter as a leadership issue and maybe it needs to be. 1/
Military attaché selectees on the first day of the “Dress for Success” block of the attaché course, in which they’re told to wear what they believe is “appropriate civilian attire for a US Embassy” to class instead of their uniforms.
I think I'm ready to talk about the Fort Hood Independent Review Committee report. This is the 1st of what will be either 2 or 3 threads. Might take a couple of days to get it all out there.
PART ONE: THE "CULTURE" HAS TO CHANGE. 1/x
Now I’m PISSED. I asked Hubs to take 2 weeks leave b/c he is NOT essential personnel at the Pentagon, & they’re still asking him to come in 3 days a week. Now DoD requires everyone to provide their own fabric masks. Wonder what REALLY OBNOXIOUS PATTERNS of quilting fabric I have?
An ask for you, Twitter friends. Those images of SGT Gee w/babies are moving & worth sharing—but I’d like to see you give equal air time to SGT Johanny Rosario Pichardo, whose life was equally valuable. And please write her name correctly. It’s not hard.
LTC Vindman did the same job for the Army in Moscow & Kyiv that I did for the Navy in Moscow—except I did it reasonably well, and Vindman did it brilliantly (the Davis School at Harvard! Damn, Skippy!) 1/x
And my mad respect goes out to General Donahoe, who tried to make his beloved Army a better-led force w/higher morale—and on balance, MORE than succeeded. I’d follow him to Hell & back, & maybe even sing a round of that silly song about rolling caissons on the trip. 23/end
I'm a former naval officer who spent 20 years on active duty, and I would gladly sign that discharge order. The Navy doesn't need willfully ignorant officers.
Good evening, Twitter. Because it’s Women’s History Month, here’s a (long) thread on Dr. Mary Edwards Walker (1832-1919), the only woman awarded the Medal of Honor to date. Thanks to
@JimLaPorta
for the inspiration! 1/
@mm_kaufman
and I quote, he "wasn't 'degreed.'" Dad fell apart. Mom was holding onto my good diploma for me, & he made her Xerox it. He took a copy, whited-out my name, typed in his own, & told me that since he "paid for" my degree 3/
On Army-Navy day, a shout-out to the former ENS who commissioned at USNA 4 mos after I commissioned at Navy OCS, & who told me she deserved more respect than me b/c she’d “been in the Navy” 4 yrs already & had held a brigade-level staff position.
Pleased to be able to share a little good news today! I've signed a (nonfiction) book contract with the wonderful folks at
@UnivNebPress
for the story of the Golden Fourteen, the first African American women to serve openly and officially in the US armed forces (
@USNavy
, WWI).
Achievement unlocked tonight: MFA in Creative Writing. Grateful to the fam for support; so proud of colleagues in my cohort; & mad respect for my mentors & the rest of the faculty who put up with me for so long.
This is a thread that will explain the implied poor Russian Army truck maintenance practices based on this photo of a Pantsir-S1 wheeled gun-missile system's right rear pair of tires below & the operational implications during the Ukrainian mud season.🧵
1/
So today I went to a memorial service for a friend from church who passed away last fall—a woman who’d served as an Army nurse in Vietnam.
@KaraDixonVuic
wrote a little about her in Officer, Nurse, Woman. Patricia—Pat—went to Vietnam in her early 20s. She 1/
PSA: Recruiters, do NOT post your recruits' ASVAB scores & PII on social media. Do you tweet about their medical evals from MEPS? Their SSNs? Their PFT scores?
I'm so pissed off at that post, I could chew up railroad spikes and spit them out as thumbtacks.
@halbritz
@SecArmy
Oh, FFS, SecArmy. You just gave me tomorrow’s thread. Also, please have your speechwriter see me for the correct definitions of a few terms—like “political,” “partisan,” & “nonpartisan.”
@BrandonFeltman
@UticaEric
@Fligherferhire
Mine absolutely loved it! We always had SO much fun with it. And it didn’t hurt their understanding of things like geography and time zones, either.
@Angry_Staffer
This should trigger an in-depth inspection of the unit he worked in, infosec at the facility, & the performance of the command security manager, the SSO, & his chain of command. Also an audit of their hard copy & electronic classified holdings. This went on much too long.
Today's 🧵 is on just a few of the many women who demonstrated exceptional moral courage in pushing back against outdated cultural attitudes about women's military service, often publicly & sometimes at great personal cost.
@SecArmy
needs to learn from the examples they set. 1/
Been married to this guy 25 years today. Couldn’t have picked a better partner! (Not our wedding photo; this was at the Marine Corps Ball at the US Embassy in Moscow in 2001.)
Women veterans are invisible. A nice Southern gentleman professor (who did not serve in Vietnam) came by our table, looked at the books, & said, “It’s just amazing what these men go through.” MEN. Note: one of the books was It’s My Country Too.
While the early records of the white family's migration from England to Tidewater VA & then to Southside (on the NC line) are murky, by 1802 Charles Senior (1763-1823 or 1824) is doing well enough to buy more than 1,000 acres of land on the north side of the Roanoke River, 2/
Just got my little green Army women, and LOOK AT THEIR HAIR! Short at the collar; in a bun; and a braid!...which does not adversely affect her performance in combat! Am sure she’ll tuck it down the back of her blouse when there’s a break in the action here on Tupperware Hill. 1/
This was an issue when I was on attaché duty. My boss, a Navy captain I thought of as “Glad-Hand Bob,” told me at 1st mid-term counseling that I needed to be more vivacious & aggressively friendly in approaching our foreign counterparts, all of whom were men, at social events. 1/
As someone who has actually had to litigate “flirting” in court more times than I can remember, let me say this:
Most of the time, the person who characterizes the behavior as “flirting” is assuming something that wasn’t actually there.
@ravenscimaven
@SwiftlyNYC
@nytimes
@debra_kamin
If you choose to sue for discrimination, I hope those repairs are included in ADDITION to whatever financial settlement you’re awarded. I’m so sorry you went through this, & wish you joy and contentment in your beautiful new home.
@JimLaPorta
A sea story thread. So by year 19 of a 20-year career, I'd seen a total of maybe three EEO complaints filed. In every case, a (white/male) CO decided the perp was "just joking around" & they & the plaintiff should "shake hands & be shipmates." 1/
This is your morning reminder that trauma survivors do not owe anyone their stories, their advocacy work, their time, or their headspace. Their only obligation is to their own self-care and healing. Thank you.
Good morning. An aspect of internalized misogyny in the military is believing that b/c you did something exceptional you ARE exceptional, & that other women who did not (or will not or cannot) do that thing are therefore weak, lesser than you, & don't belong. 1/
Ooh, I'm probably about to get kicked out of a FB group on historic houses. Pointed out that the admin has a double standard for what she considers "rude and hateful" speech: one for Lost Causers, another for descendants of people enslaved by the owners of those historic houses.
@ashtonpittman
This week in our quiet MD suburb somebody posted on NextDoor that a Black woman in a black car had been at local mailboxes, urged folks to watch out for "suspicious activity." (Most of our contract mail carriers are Black women who drive their own cars.) Not just in MS!
there are more than 200 enslaved people credited to him. Some were brought there when, late in life, he married; they were part of his first wife's dowry. In 1814 that wife (Harriet) dies, probably either giving birth to or of complications from the birth of a son, Eaton. 4/
well-watered by small streams & Butcher's Creek. He adds acres on the south side of the river, & one of the men he enslaves runs a private ferry which augments the family's income from the crops of tobacco, wheat, & corn the enslaved people raise. On the 1820 census 3/
Recently had occasion to assist an estranged Navy spouse whose sailor brought a floozy side piece home from deployment & who was maliciously declining to provide his spouse & child w/benefits to which they are legally entitled & which he is legally obligated to provide until 1/
This morning a friend, an ANC nurse in Vietnam for 2 very rough years, passed away. Some of her final health issues were probably from exposure to Agent Orange when she cut clothing off wounded soldiers.
Be thou at peace, dear one. Thank you for the gift of your friendship.
@McCainJack
, I keep running into your grandfather in the National Archives! Certainly knew how to take care of his sailors (this file clerk had been an enlisted mess attendant in WWI).
I’ve been contacted by members of our voluntary military who say they will quit if the COVID vaccine is mandated.
I introduced HR 3860 to prohibit any mandatory requirement that a member of the Armed Forces receive a vaccination against COVID-19.
It now has 24 sponsors.
This is where we first see the enslaved, about 190 of them, named: in the estate inventory. Even the children of the enslaved are named. The executor assigns each a dollar value & divides them into 3 groups w/other property, making roughly-equal thirds. 9/
Good morning to everyone except Jim Golby. I'd like to say a few things about emotionally abusive relationships this morning. First, emotional abuse is abuse. Full stop. 1/
I believe women. I have been in an abusive relationship, when I was younger. I will not engage w/any man outed as abusive if he hasn’t done sincere, earnest work to repair damage done, & demonstrated through words & actions that he has become a better man. IYKYK. That is all.
Woke up to news that one of my stories was accepted for publication in an upcoming themed issue of a journal I love. A nice reprieve from all the terrible things going on. May you all get a similar boost soon!
A few years later Charles Sr., now in his 50s, marries 23yo Martha from the south side of the river. A dynastic marriage: she's the daughter of a wealthier Tidewater scion & Revolutionary War veteran, 2 lieutenant governors of the VA Colony in her family tree. 5/
As a PS, should have said it up front: I need to thank all the senior enlisted women who taught me how to manage these situations compassionately & shared the tools in the toolkit. There were mostly no senior women officers around in these situations & the men just didn’t know.
from worse before.
But all I could think about in the drive home was how much I’ll miss even the nasty little jabs about my house or my cooking or whatever if she isn’t with us next Christmas.
Dammit. 7/end
1/ I don’t usually tell my “Alive Day” story. It happened in “peacetime,” at least for the US, and less than 2 years later we were at war for real. My story seemed lame. But the Parkland shooting has brought it to mind again. This is why I’m one of the
#VetsForGunReform
:
“I had fought in World War II, and I once was captured by the German army, and I want to tell you the Germans never were as inhumane as the state troopers of Alabama.” - Veteran Hosea Williams in Roy Reed, "Alabama Police Use Gas and Clubs to Rout Negroes," NYT (Mar. 8, 1965)
PSA: Today is NOT the day to argue w/me about sexual assault issues. I have training, experience (including being a survivor of assault & a victim advocate), and my red-headed hillbilly temper is pegging the meter over this West Point BS.
Anyway. Piecing all this together is so much different from just picking up a book about enslaved people in Southside Virginia and northeastern Mississippi. What became of little Charles, & his sisters Margaret and Mary Eliza, & their mother Lizzy? 27/
And her family's land prob runs right up against Charles's holdings on the south side of the Roanoke. Her dowry includes more enslaved people—perhaps as many as 30. Despite the age difference, theirs was a warm enough union to produce 3 more children, 2 boys & a girl. 6/
Baby Sis thought she was picking up a sweet little Regency romance at the train station. Nope. Period erotica. By page 24, the hero is humping the heroine from behind & she’s panting. I haven’t laughed this hard in months.