Navin Noronha
@HouseOfNoronha
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637
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Touring with my new show. For bookings, email utkarsh @lasoonlive .com.
Mumbai
Joined April 2011
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Today marks three years since I had to leave my home because a cousin shared a pic of me kissing my partner with my entire family.
Today my partner and I have a great life, our three cats, and our families still accept us.
My cousin is currently bankrupt.
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Him - What are you into?
Me - BDSM
Him - I like the sound...
Me - ...BRING DOWN SHAH MODI
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Can't believe Emraan Hashmi is the least controversial of this trio now.
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I lived inside the closet and died every day for 23 years. Last week my mom told me she wished I had come out sooner. I owe everything to my mom and her infinite patience.
To all parents out there, your kids look up to you the most in times of peril. Please do not abandon them.
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We are so used to glorifying working through misery in this country. It's sickening.
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We hung a rainbow flag outside our house and now my neighbour brings his toddler to our door to learn the colours. This is the cutest gay moment of our lives.
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Make your gay characters complex. Problematic. Nasty fuckers who do bad things. Unapologetic. Evil. Manipulative. Unlikeable. Three dimensional. Villainous. Not just the ‘cute’ teens holding hands.
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If HBO can leave a coffee cup in Game of Thrones, then you can go right ahead and send that email to the wrong client!
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Ria sweety you're expecting too much from the woman who wrote a Chinese character called Cho Chang.
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Mom - So Section 377 is gone, do you still need to go to a Pride?
Me - God's son already came down to Earth. Do you still need to go to church?
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The existence of a Top Ramen suggests that there is a Bottom Ramen somewhere.
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I've had it till here with
@bookmyshow
and its incompetence.
I don't know on what basis their customer care is dictating whether queer couples can enter MY show. A queer comedy lineup ffs.
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IT'S GONE!
Section 377 has been decriminalised by the Indian Supreme Court.
This is monumental and brings so much relief to so many queer Indians.
Homophobes, don't even come at me today, I swear.
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Someone called Pragya Thakur a Babri Girl and I haven't stopped laughing since.
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This is what 5 year olds do at Catholic weddings.
#WATCH
: Bajrang Dal members create ruckus at Hyderabad's Manjeera Mall on
#ValentinesDay
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Young comedians in India. If you're out there thinking that one day you'll make it to the stage of
@canvaslaughclub
and you'll finally be paid, let me tell you that you should lower your expectations. For almost two years now, majority of Mumbai's comics haven't been paid. (1/n)
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Don't beat your kids if they tell you they're gay.
You never know which one of us is into BDSM.
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Fellow spineless comedians. Please speak up. Use your fucking blue ticks.
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This is also a good time to observe how all your engineering buddies who ran to the USA the first chance they got are conveniently quiet now. They aren't pulling a Swades any time soon.
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At this point, Indian democracy is exactly like reality show. Each month, another state doesn't proceed forward to the next round in the Superpower 2020 finale.
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Straight dudes who haven't eaten dick can shut the fuck up and stop recommending "trying" pussy to me.
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Straight dudes: so you won't hit on me right?
Me: No, you're not my type.
Straight dudes: Oh really? Then what's your type?
Me: Gay dudes.
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Found a gay porn star who looks exactly like Sambit Patra.
100 rts and I'll post screenshot I swear.
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Never forget this vile creature Shefali Vaidya referred to countless deaths of innocents as "pandemic porn".
There isn't a place deep enough in hell for the scum that she is.
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Queer people - we want to have equal rights.
Tushar Mehta - but i want to fuck my sister.
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Amul will do a 'Tu Juicy Main Makkan' pun this week I'm telling yall.
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Gay till I die.
Today marks a new beginning for many more like me, who have lived in constant fear and denial.
No more.
I'm done hiding.
We're done hiding.
#ByeByeSection377
#outandproud
#gaysexforall
PC
@qgraphygroup
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Sorry I missed your call.
It's 2019. You should have just texted.
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I love that there's a right wing homosexual working so hard to make sure that even bhakts don't vote for BJP.
Hazrat! Hazrat! Hazrat!
To encourage Maharashtra to vote for
@narendramodi
&
@BJP4India
my special BJP dance from the historic heart of Mumbai - ideated, choreographed and brought to you by
@modioncemore
#AbkiBaar400Paar
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Me - passes by a hotel in a rickshaw.
Google Maps - How was your stay at Grand Hyatt?
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This country runs on poverty porn.
Chandigarh Police Constable Priyanka Controlling the traffic with her baby in her arms at Sector 23-24 Intersection.
Hats off to the Spirit 🙏
@ssptfcchd
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My college did a "Time Capsule" theme for the 2012 annual fest. It was supposed to come out ten years later so we could reconnect with our 2012 selves. Well, this is what came out yesterday. Turns out a bunch of engineering students couldn't figure out how to keep water out.
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This guy is pure fucking supervillain level of nasty.
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2009 me was busy adding everyone on Facebook while the 2019 me is busy deleting everyone on a monthly basis.
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Hi everyone, working on a piece that aims to tell stories of abuse and sexual assault from within the LGBTQ community. If you know someone who has accounts of the same, do reach out to me.
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Hotstar has all the good shows.
Too bad Torrents offers a hassle-free user interface tho.
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The person even sent me an audio recording of the call. It just breaks my heart that after striving to create an inclusive environment in comedy, some dumbfuck at a ticketing portal thinks it's cute to chime in and discourage queer couples as audiences? What the actual fuck.
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@notkidd_
@sibaileyus
@saiwengshima81
@troychifan
@ampol_moment
Yeah because he's an impeccable example of a global leader.
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Yeah he is a leading man in films and you write for 6rs per word at mensxp.
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Let the kids believe in Santa. After all, there's grown ass men in India who believe in Achhe Din.
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I have been in comedy long enough to know nothing will change and they will go back to featuring on each other's podcasts and live streams, and jerking each other off. No homo.
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I have been waiting for months to type this. But I've been afraid that they will make me wait for longer. But I am done. I give absolutely no shits whatsoever now. These people are vermin. Using comedians and their talents to further their venue and not paying them. For shame.
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There's no bigger tragedy than seeing a comedian trying their viral tweet on stage and watching it bomb beautifully.
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.
@ShefVaidya
just outed queer people from a closed group without their consent in a bid to expose the memes made on her.
Remember this vile creature.
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I went to a South Indian restaurant in Amritsar and ordered a Masala Dosanjh
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If Paresh Rawal doesn't get punched in that Farhan Akhtar boxing movie, then I'm not watching it.
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Indian Government thinks our culture doesn't recognise same-sex unions.
Well, I don't recognise the Indian Government. So there.
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Who called it the Sunday Mass and not 'issues with Yeshu'?
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Boy they are gunning for Anurag Kashyap next. This cheap ass government's low life techniques are worse than a 90s b-grade revenge drama.
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Housing society uncles act like if they don't play patriotic music at 8, Pakistan will come and capture their building premises first.
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It's because we have a spine.
Remove sex jokes and politics, the 'comedians' will only be standing and doing nothing else.
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New stand-up video!
Please watch, like, subscribe and share with your train groups.
Link:
#comedy
#standupcomedy
#bhayander
#SOBO
#keepingitqueer
#navinnoronha
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Normalise saying "no" when someone calls and asks "is this a good time to talk?"
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I miss the time when men asked you for a dick pic on Grindr instead of "did you scream slogans at the Mumbai Pride you commie homo?".
Calm the fuck down daddy.
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.
@thequeenpri
is a ray of light in this gloomy world. I got to interview her for
@viceindia
and had goosebumps throughout.
Read it here:
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You'll find a Piyush Mishra feature in places you'd least expect. TIL that he is the male vocalist on Chhaliya (from Tashan)!?
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When I get married, my wedding card will clearly mention - Bring gifts. Your blessings can stay home.
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I met the beerbiceps guy at my podcasting job once and it changed my life forever.
I realised I was way better off chubby and funny than whatever he turned into.
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Akshay Kumar romancing Saif Ali Khan and his daughter with equal gusto. A true king.
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Hello Twitter,
Working on the third season of my podcast, Keeping it Queer.
If you think you know or have met queer (LGBTQIA+) individuals from India (and otherwise) who are amazing and need to be featured, do let me know.
Hugs in advance.
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New comedy video.
Shot this back in 2018. You know, when things were good and a room could have 300 people.
Watch here:
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Dude looks like he used to chill in a pond till a princess kissed him.
“If you create panic out of the crisis, every government has a right to control the panic.”
As Covid critical posts are removed on social media platforms in India, the BJP's
@gopalkagarwal
responds with “tweeters have to comply" with the country's content regulations
#Newsnight
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Dutee Chand is an Olympic sprinter and her family is giving her a hard time for coming out.
Now imagine what it feels for an average Indian to come out.
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That BJP cover-up manifesto can be summed up as - India has too many people and we feel not enough have died tbh.
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Supreme Court to declare the verdict on
#Section377
tomorrow. It's going to be a sleepless night. Fingers crossed 🤞
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India, a nation of grown-ass kids still playing statue with each other.
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Hi friends, many of us comedians who rely on live shows for income are currently jobless because of the pandemic. If you can, support your local artists in some way or another. YouTube is one way some of us pull in money. Just share one video with two people and start the chain.
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Turns out if you're unhappy in Mumbai, you'll be unhappy in Goa too.
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Why can't the Lucknow police AI recognise horny expression on men instead?
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I know my comedy sends at least one bhakt to sleep agitated every night, and that's all I live for.
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Our dear friend
@sidudeja
hasn't been paid for a shows he did in 2017 to the tune of 1 lac. When confronted they just keep passing the ball from one person to another. I've given everything when I went to perform on stage. And to treat comics like this, it's only fair (2/n)
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You may not want to believe it, but YRF never made films for Indians. It was always for the NRIs, and local Indians just happened to be the fallout. I'd reckon their films are part of the reason so many brown kids outside grow up in sanskari echo chambers. Asli India ka no clue.
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Most of my exes were closet cases. One of em would say - if anyone ever sees us together, instead of us being boyfriends, say we met at Shiamak Dawar's dance class.
Yeah because that's not gay at all.
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That most people prefer working in a company instead of doing standup. Your big guys will get paid from corporate gigs, but if you're a mid level comic, you might as well wait tables after your set to pay your bills.
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Problem with these dude Bros is that they have never seen hardships in their entire lives but want to be the first one to shit on others with said hardships. These are some of the worst men in India with money given the power and limelight that they don't deserve.
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Because we don't fucking live in Pakistan chodu
Anti-CAA protestors should raise their voice against Pak's atrocities of the past, says Modi in Karnataka. Asks what stops them from protesting against Pakistan
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OML comics being worried that what happened to Munawar can happen to them as well is the funniest thing some of them have written in a while.
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