No more "young man can't keep up with his horny old boyfriend", more "young man has so much stamina his old boyfriend fears he's going to die from too much sex"
Devil May Cry 5 release AND International Women's Day on the same day and dudebros still wonder if this fandom contains women???????
This game was MADE to honor us
Woke up thinking about some of the DMC4 cutscenes in the pachinkos that have upgraded graphics and specifically, I am going insane by how ridiculously fluffy and soft they made Angelo Credo look
Really want Dante and Nero to fuck in the middle of the Fortuna church in some weird sex ritual way where Dante tells Nero he's a better worshipper of Sparda than anyone else in this hellhole of an island because Nero brings the son of Sparda himself to his knees
Guys I can't do this.
I need to get this out of my system.
Reboot Dante looks like he says "no homo" while he's in the middle of a gay orgy, sucking off like, five guys at the same time and getting DP'd
Dante having one of his "I'm going to isolate and hopefully drink myself to death" episodes that is sabotaged by Nero who was called over by one of the girls or like, Morrison. So, in an attempt to get him to fuck off, Dante becomes extremely cruel towards him
"Stop feminizing this masculine character. Stop writing this character OOC. Stop pairing this character who already has a partner in can---" Oh my god who fucking CARES
WHO CARES WHO CARES WHO THE FUCK CARES!!!! THEY'RE NOT REAL THEY'RE PIXEL DOLLS!!!!
Do you think Dante gets a thousand yard stare and/or dissociates when Nero flirts with him because he has finally understood how Grue must have felt like when HE was 15/16 years old trying to bang a depressed 38 year old widower
One of my most favourite hcs continues to be that Fortuna has like, a FUCKTON of ridiculously horny and sexy art/statues of Sparda that nobody really blinks an eye at
Deeply, DEEPLY obsessed with the idea of Nero admiring Dante, but also *fearing* him on an instinctual level. Nero's demon knows this man is *dangerous*. That he's *stronger* than them. Can easily dominate and tear them to shreds. And yet. Nero can't help himself.
Tossing Vergil in there is so funny because all you have to do to calm this motherfucker down is to simply drop his brother or son in front of him to tell him "you stop that right now"
While Nero's on his knees, Dante presses two fingers still dripping with his own blood against Nero's lips. When the kid snarls, Dante simply smirks and finally pushes those fingers deep in Nero's mouth.
"It's just like taking communion, right?"
You ever think about. This. And go. Slightly insane. More feral than a coyote in a bear trap while also suffering from end-stage rabies.
Just asking. For a friend.
"Nero's 19 in DMC4"
"No he's 18"
You're both wrong he's 16/17 and my proof is that it makes me horny as shit thinking of Dante being a gross uncle lusting after this 17 year old
I don't think we talk about Nico and her tattoos enough, in my opinion. Specifically, how extremely, indescribably fucking hot her pistol womb tattoo is like. Oh my god. Oh my fucking god.
Imagine saying, with a straight face "the people who want two pixels to kiss are the real pedos" while every single one of you goes around and distributes ACTUAL CSEM because "omg bestie lemme look!!!!! 🤪 I wanna see if it's real 🤭"
Nero: Sure the Order used to beat me into obedience but they also gave me a punishment kink so who's the real winner here, huh
Dante, who has Nero bent over his knee, in the middle of spanking:
Dante: Can we not talk about this right now
When the fuck did fandom go from shipping every single character together under the sun and having fun with it, as well as discussing the deeper meanings/themes of said relationships, to "we cannot ship anyone together EVER lest their Purity And Innocence Be Stripped Away"
Sitting... Thinking about the fact Nero used to be a teenage assassin.... To people he was led to believe were demonically possessed but were, in reality, perfectly normal people who just happened to be political enemies of Sanctus......
Dante once convinced Nico to wire all the demon corpses and heads mounted in DMC up like they're one of those singing basses
The chaos this ensued cannot be described into words
Self-shipper anti-spardacesties are so fucking funny. "Our bf/husband Dante is back!" Dante is too busy breaking his son-nephew's hymen, babygirl. He won't answer your texts. Just give it up
[TDJ] Card Reveal
"Nero"
<Shield>
When HP becomes 5 or higher for the first time: Gain +1/+1 for each different Tribe among friendly units.
<Coordination>: 1
Gain <Spillover>.
#TEPPEN
#DevilMayCry
If you ask Nero what's the scariest thing he's seen he won't say the million times he and Dante have almost died but the time he found Dante naked in the kitchen, 3am, eyes glowing, and drinkimg straight out of the milk carton
I think the Spardas should become more feral and animal-like the angrier they become, ESPECIALLY in their triggers. Just absolutely overtaken by instincts and /rage/
Dante & Trish: This kid was raised by humans, to behave solely like humans. There's NO WAY he has any kind of demonic drive like we do
Nero's demon in his mind: **Munching and gnawing on its own legs like a severely understimulated dog*
Suddenly deeply obsessed with the thought of a Nero in heat that wants to get knocked up so badly he forces himself on everything and anything that has a pulse
Once again thinking about that part in the second Urizen fight where SDT Dante swoops in to protect Nero and it's like... He's spreading out his wings and doing a full protective display. Like. What the fuck was THAT.
All my mutuals and followers are such cumbrained chads I can literally say whatever the fuck and they'll pull their dicks out and agree with me
Watch
*Clears throat* Nero's holes getting bred
The queer and freaky side of the fandom has been trying to tell you guys this for literal YEARS now and you all brushed us away as "porn addicted fake fan fujos"
DMC as a series is unironically more subtle in its character writing than a lot of people give it credit for. DMC3 directly never tells you that Vergil is primarily motivated by the death of his mother to try and gain power in order to never again feel that helplessness,-
The people in the qrts going "yeah! That's right! I'll make that [insert the most boring vanilla "cringe" shit here]" are missing the point so hard its funny
My dudes this tweet is about proshippers. OP means write your disgusting fucked up agegap/incest shit
are you really going to spend your one single life on gods green earth not drawing or writing whatever deranged thing is in your head you enjoy just bc some teen with a enstars pfp on a website with a 2 years remaining lifespan said it would make you ontologically evil. get real
Cap/com trying to make Nero look like some cool-ass fuckboy who gets mad pussy in certain art is soooo funny. This man nearly pissed himself when he saw Gloria. He was a split second away from tearing his skin off when Morrigan was in the same vicinity as him
Certain people in a certain art tag: Anyway instead of supporting gross shit support my sexy as shit art uvu
The sexy as shit art: *Literally the ugliest chicken scratch you have ever laid your eyes upon. It brings sickness on your body and bile in your mouth*
Need Dante post-Hell to be SO clingy to Nero because he's missed him so much. Drapes himself all over Nero in bed. Becomes Nero's shadow. Refuses to leave him alone for even a second.
"You're a sinner, Nero." Whispered softly against a hot ear. It sounds loving coming from Dante's mouth. Like it's a *blessing* & not something foul that has turned his very soul rotten.
Will literally NEVER stop thinking about Nero secretly boiling with jealousy seeing DV happy and together again, while he'll never get to have that with Credo. Credo is gone & dead & unlike Vergil, he will NEVER come back. Never tell him that he never truly hated him
I think Nero should feel so fucking *weird* with his new, regrown human arm that he cuts it off all on his own at some point. It feels *weird*, it feels *wrong*. It doesn't belong on his body. His arm used to be demonic. It should have been that, or a prosthetic at the very least
The queer dmc community took one look at Nero's DT and we all collectively agreed that this man has a pussy in that form and I think that's beautiful. Teamwork. Hivemind.
Imagine being a normie and tagging your friends under a piece of spardacest art. What's wrong? Itty bitty little baby so scaaaaaawed of some lines on an art program that you need your friends to hold your hand and give you emotional support? God you're so embarrassing
I love how DMC antis keep alienating themselves from the fandom to the point where the only art they can retweet is ugly tumblr fanart with fugly noses and caricature-ish features
You're only harming yourselves here, guys
And for that, I'm grateful <3
Absolutely obsessed with Nero being treated like he's a proper angel. Dirty talked about it while in DT. Praised about his wings. His long, silky hair. His elegant body and horns. There's no way he's a demon. No way something so beautiful shares the filthy blood of Sparda
I find it extremely funny that Trigun x DMC crossovers never mention or include Nero in it. In my opinion, it's a really good idea that he's not mentioned because I think he'd basically be
Every once in a while, an Asian artist who draws legitimate MASTERPIECES gets obsessed with DMC and specifically Credo and draws the most breathtaking art you've ever laid your eyes upon
And I think that's the funniest fucking thing in the world
Credo sitting with his head in his hands, pulling his hair. When Nero and Kyrie rush to ask him what's wrong, he doesn't have the heart to confess he's Fighting Demons.
(Wants to make a nest for the three of them. NEEDS to preen Nero HOLY SHIT HOW DO YOU WALK AROUND LIKE THAT)
Sometimes I think about how, at the beginning of 5, it was shown that Nero had grown SO comfortable with his bringer. He was no longer hiding it!!! He was showing it off as if it was just a regular arm!!!! He was accepting his demon identity!!!
Only for Vergil to take that away
Devil May Cry V - Dante Black Label 1/2 Scale Statue is up for preorder at Prime 1 Studio ($4,299)
Standard $2,699
features Dante from the Devil May Cry series
Will literally never stop thinking about the possibility that DT Nero is THE sexiest motherfucker in demon society solely because he's just SO FUCKING COLOURFUL
Anyway. Do u think demons, like cheetahs, have a specific sound they can make that will cause their partner to immediately start ovulating/become fertile as fuck?
I hope Dante abuses the shit out of it and pisses Nero off soooo bad. He doesn't need tHIS IN THE MIDDLE OF A JOB
Dante using Nero's wings to pull him back onto his cock when fucking him.... Grabbing at the bases of them in a near-bruising, crushing grip and dragging him back onto each thrust
Every time Nero whimpers "oh, Sparda" during sex, it makes Dante fuck him so much harder just so he can hear him call out Dante's name in the same holy, reverent way
Hnnrgh Dante grabbing DT Nero by the hair, twisting the rest he's not holding around his arm. Then, as he tips Nero's snarling head back to face him, he sticks a thumb on the side of the boy's mouth, prying it open, and spits into it.
Nero shouldn't have regrown his amputated arm at the end of the game. It was basically like Cap/com giving people a disabled character and then being like "sikes bitch you thought"
"DMC5 is the ultimate DV game" WRONG. DMC5 is Nero stuck in a harem anime against his will. All these bitches want to fuck/get fucked by him, meanwhile he's going through a Very Bad No Good Day after one of the bitches called him useless
Man, I love being a big, nasty incest shipper that scares away all the innocent children from this r18/mature-rated game with explicit violence, gore, and the EQUALLY EXPLICIT implication that the main character has fucked the clone of his mother, as well as seen her naked
I know that the first Urizen encounter was the very first time DN saw each other again after DMC4. I KNOW IT. And yet. I can't stop thinking about Dante visiting Nero while in a coma. Seeing Nero without his arm. Hooked up to medical machinery /he shouldn't need/. Hough.
He is "an unwanted mistake who should have died after being born"? Oooh, that's a nasty one. Unfortunately for Dante, this isn't the first time he's heard something along those lines hurled at him. Get more creative or shut the fuck up and let Nero clean up the place & help you
Sorry kid, daddy can't fuck right now. Daddy is busy having a mid-life crisis thinking about HIS chases after a 38 year old widower when he was at your age
5Nero is the epitome of the "jock fuckboy who acts and thinks like he's the straightest boy to ever straight discovers that he's actually a massive slut after getting pounded stupid by an older man" kink