Pumpkin 🇯🇲
@Andi_O
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Lover of science, dancehall, and chocolate. Works in healthcare. Funny yet serious. Follow at your own risk. 🇯🇲
Kingston, Jamaica
Joined February 2009
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Pinned Tweet
Yes, my side!! Champions on and off the field. 🏆🏅
We take this moment to recognize the stellar achievement of the Blood Strikers team at
@1bloodbankja
, winners of today’s Ministry of Health & Wellness’ Sports Day.
We also extend our gratitude to all participating teams for their sportsmanship and effort.👏🏾😁
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Jamaica Customs
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My 3 year old grandson was pleased to show off his riding skills today. "Grandma, the training wheels are OFF!"
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One you see later and the other, you'll see in a while. 🤷♀️
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All if dem light up the sky, Jamaican taxi drivers nuh business
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Why people always ah beg me? Dem nuh know seh ah pride ah keep me from out deh wid dem?
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All this talk about world champions, etc. but how comes only Earth participates in Miss Universe?
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Supermarket when yuh bruk is an extreme sport. Yuh all ah use Pythagoras Theorem fi calculate de bill before yuh reach de cashier.
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Black-Frequent power cuts
Green- Arm in the heat when light gone
Gold-When you see the light bill and you piss up yourself
What me win?
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7krave man seh him going mek sure I get my food hot. He stuck to his word. De drinks hot too.
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34 years ago on this day. Then came the happiest day of my life to date - 01/07/2001 - decree absolute.
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Yuh spirit ever just bruk yet? Like yuh cyaa bodda nuh more? Yeah!
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Started my career as a Medical Technologist on this day 33 years ago.
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When de fraudster dem look inna fi mi account, dem ah guh put likkle money in deh outta pity. 😒
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Mi baby fada need a good meal. Him ah look like a sperm now. Bere head.
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With this kind of thinking, min' yuh nuh get fi put women inna ANY position enuh...😉
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Man
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Light
Bill Gates isn't available, Can you name another Famous "Bill"?
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I've found my new hobby. Cutting off taxi germs. Just school one on HWT Road. Him going cuss me till ah mawning. Man tell me fi suck mi mada. Me tell him fi do him fada fus'. Him shut up faas faas.
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Sometimes, two people who are meant for each other will have to face some of the hardest obstacles in order to be together.
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This guy's going to drop dead on camera one of these days
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Any change in the patient's condition?
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It's officially the best day of the year!! Public holiday?? Weh yuh seh?
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Me nuh waan charge fi murdah so if yuh waan fi inna mi circle, like this tweet. If yuh ah guh drop down when me seh certain tings...gwaan drink likkle wata and guh siddung and nuh badda.
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I lost over 200. Divorce is great.
Me: I just lost twenty pounds!
Husband: Please stop calling the baby that.
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Changing mi name to SuperStar because me ah nuh ordinary smaddy
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Heard of a woman who said she can't breathe in the mask so she stopped wearing one. She's no longer breathing.
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People still watch Rising Stars? If I had the choice between watching it or darkness, darkness would win every time.
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Please say a prayer for my granddaughter as you go along your way this morning. She's sick and most likely will be admitted in hospital. 😪
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Hundred stab t'ousand juk
pull up to her house on a rainy night w a loud speaker, what should be playing?
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Well, there you have it. Straight from Brownies mouth.
Me: Who yu love, Brownie?
Brownie: YOU!!!
😂😂
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Little boy on Spanish Town Road on Friday: Auntie, me love you. Remember that night when you sang with a little boy by Devon House at the light? Ah me.
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Went to see my grandkids just now. Poor Grandma had to draw for her inhaler. Bout me ah play football. Yuh waan fi see me. 🤣🤣
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Ah suh Twitter bruk? Not even 1 balloon to baxide. Times hard.
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Ah 15K worth ah gas me buy Sunday, another 5K tideh, and me ah guh country ah mawning so haffi guh buy more gas. Back Road, here I come!!
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Tell yuh what...if Twitter goes down, me going stand up inna HWT and wave ah mawning time cause me really going miss unnu. How dat sound?
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All this wedding talk on the TL. If I ever get married again, I'm either going to elope or have a very small wedding on the beach. Simple for the ceremony. Big on the actual marriage.
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Well...lizard jump pon me just now. Gender reveal soon. Stay tuned.
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If unnu know weh me know, unnu keep unnu baxide quiet tonight. But since unnu cyaa hear, thanks for keeping me in a work.
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I am begging you. PLEASE FOLLOW THE PROTOCOLS!
1. Wear a mask.
2. Maintain social distance.
3. Wash your hands and sanitize frequently.
#TanAhYuYaad
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Police draw down pon me on Shortwood Road. Block de road wid de pickup enuh and come out wid long gun. Me seh "Officer, me just done send off over 1,500 covid result. Nuh bodda wid it tonight." Him look pon mi ID and wave me on.
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People are upset because, in their opinion, not enough samples were tested. They think you just put on the sample on the machine just so? There are pre-analytic processes that must be done before that.
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Long fi a gentleman come pick me up, open the car door fi me, and hold mi hand while we drive. Sascrise man!
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Sister and I were in Prep school. Daddy worked night shifts and weekends at times. One day, he came for us early, told our teachers we had doctor's appointments, and took us to the beach.
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Never too frighten this time. Ketch me later when me and de sleep ah tump it out.
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Spoon
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Drove through HWT earlier and I laughed at everybody wearing a Brazil shirt. Me laugh till mi belly bottom start hurt me. Imagine...dem haffi wear dem till dem guh home. L every weh! 🤣🤣🤣
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"This way to our casket showroom."
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Opened the camera to make a video and the damn thing was in selfie mode. Sascrise, me frighten yf. Me just lock it back.
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