Fall Out Mom ✨🖤
@wimpymomdiary
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music & mom shit 🤘🏼🖤✨
Chicagooooooo / 31
Joined May 2021
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In a local mom group. The comment section is not going the way she planned 😂🤣
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@Meisterfaith
oh my gosh stop!! I never thought this would blow up and someone else in that group would see 😅
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I avoided dishes all weekend so I could be outside with my kids. So worth it! The dishes will be there, your kids will never be this small again 💛✨☀️
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My husband thinks I’m overreacting by not wanting to send our 4yo back to pre k next year but I don’t think he realizes every single morning I’m afraid she won’t come home. Every single morning I’m the one that takes her to school bc EYE need to be the one to see her off. My
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A few of my fav housekeeping hacks:
-I do NOT clean up toys during the day, they’re only going to be taken back out. I was spending 1/2 my time worrying about toys now they only get cleaned up at the end of the night
-I run my dishwasher every night even if it’s not totally full,
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I’m 4yrs & 2 kids into parenting, I straight up tell my husband I’m not going to an event bc I know I’ll get stuck running after the kids while he enjoys his time. He just took our 4yo to his friends sons (8) bday party and he’s like “you & 1yo arnt coming?” FUCK NO 😂 I would
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WIC needs to chill tf out with cereal honestly! And believe me, my 1 & 4yo eats cereal every single day 😭 I could really use more eggs & fruit/veggies tho!
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I wish you could simply ✨unsubscribe✨ from your period when you’re done having kids. There is no use. Wasted energy. Wasted products. Wasted money. I’m over it.
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Who remembers those Chicken Soup for the Soul books? Had a hold on the early 2000’s!
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My period is 2 days late so why am I worrying like my husband didn’t have a vasectomy 15m ago 😅
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My SIL sent a huge back of hi chews home for my FOUR YEAR OLD?? Straight to the fucking trash 😂
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I need to know if I’m totally bugging. If your a SAHM, does your partner do things around the house? Do you have to tell them to do the obvious things that need to get done or are they able to see for themselves what needs done? My husband and I can be looking at the same room
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Ya’ll my SIL said she works too much and is too busy to visit her niece & nephew for ONE HOUR ONCE A MONTH. Imagine having your head so far up your own asshole that you cannot spend 12 hours out of an ENTIRE YEAR with your niece & nephew. I can’t believe I ever fucking named my
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I was in the middle of making lunch & my 4yo comes up to me & says mommy look at my pretty rainbow bus! And hands me this, her brothers birthday present he got 4 days ago 🥲 I was quiet and stone faced for a good 30 sec before I paused the music & got on her level. I told her it
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and I could name 10 things that need done and he’d say “nah looks fine in here”. “Just tell me what to do and I’ll do it” IM NOT YOUR MOMMY I SHOULDNT HAVE TO WRITE DOWN EVERY STEP FOR YOU. Bro it’s your house too! I worry what this place would look like if I weren’t around.
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@MegStEsprit
This is such a great response. I’ve already been wanting to hide the messiness of life to my nearly 5yo but like, she gets it! Explaining things in real and age appropriate ways makes all the difference. “Life is messy” idk I just really appreciated that in this moment.❤️
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My FIL leaves for his yearly Guatemala trip today and just like my in laws, instead of bringing their grown adult selves here to visit our kids before he leaves they’re making my husband bundle up our 1 & 4 yo to go there. They live 5min away. The feels like is -33 my kids aren’t
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anxiety is at an all time high and he doesn’t get it. Life is far too short to send my baby away for a few hours a day to “socialize”.
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What’s the funniest thing your kid has slept with?
My 2yo currently sleeps w his Hot Wheels Target semi truck 😂
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much rather he take 4yo and they can have a good time & me & 1yo stay home, go for a walk, just chill. Also otherwise I’d be pushing him to leave early and I hate doing that too! Please just enjoy your time away from me!! LMAO
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If you smell your child has pooped why on earth for any reason would you wait 15min to change them? Gross behavior.
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If you have a partner that snores, like really loud, how do you deal w that?
Years ago I tried earplugs and that was fine but with kids now I feel like that’s not safe. I’m at the point too where I’m frustrated it’s my problem to deal w and he won’t try anything..
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was indeed a pretty rainbow bus! But we don’t use crayons on toys, right? We use them on paper only. She agreed and repeated what I said. And that was it. My bad for leaving the crayon box on the table. It may wash off it may not, it’s a toy and it still works exactly the same.
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Can’t stop thinking she doesn’t get to hug & kiss her babies as they wake up this morning. The girls are probably wondering where their mama is. My heart is so fucking heavy. 💛 🐝
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Housing market is fucking insane.
We bought in 2020 for $169k
A friend in our subdivision just sold his home for $310k
A house down the street, not in our subdivision, just sold for $410k
Bro I’m so fucking happy we bought here when we did. I’m so fucking sorry for everyone else.
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Kids will do kid things and it’s so important not to yell & reprimand them for these small instances that, in the big scheme of life, mean nothing! Anyway. Maybe a magic eraser?
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Cute little reading goal this year! Last year was 12 and I wanted to push myself to do more than 1 a month 😊 more reading, less phone 📚 who wants to be good reads friends??
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My child’s pre school gave a box of food to each family that came to the winter event today!! So much produce😍 not to mention each student got pajamas, socks, a hat, gloves & a new book!
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-Put the butt of the bread inside the sandwich & cut it into shapes & they’ll never know! (It’s worked 3/3 times so far 😅)
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I don’t think the letter is true
Fuck Verity she got what she deserved
My first CoHo book and wow she did not waste any time!! Literally cannot put it down. Mark my words I’ll finish the second half tomorrow (I started Tue night)
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then I can empty the clean dishes every morning so I have an empty dishwasher to load my dishes into as the day progresses so I never have a pile up of dishes in/around my sink.
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Fuck the kids at weddings topic.
I’ve been w my husband since we were teenagers. My cousin got married and I asked if my boyfriend could come and they said only partners that were married could.
Definitely harbor some resentment 12yrs later since my husband & I are married now.
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During my 1st pregnancy we hoped for a boy so that our future children would have that ‘older brother protector’ type thing going on. But let me tell you..NO ONE is going to be messing with my son bc his big sister means business when it comes to him!! She loves him so fiercely.
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@makaylaxmarie_
My 4yo loves when she’s the only one at the gym daycare 😂 it’s harder to get her to leave when there’s kids and she’s been making friends for an hour!
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If 50 of you hotties like this tweet I’ll send it & get my nose pierced when we take my daughter for her ears at the end of the month 👂🏼👃🏽 👂🏼 🪡
I’ve wanted it for so. long. but I’ve been a little bitch and putting it off lmao
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I buy my kids clothes a size up so they can grow into them the. out of them. Little kids grow too fast to be buying whole wardrobes every 6m!
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This is my sink after breakfast and I have no plans on touching it until after we make & eat lunch 😌
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My mom got my 4yo a Dr set with ONE HUNDRED PIECES. That’s obnoxious. Not to mention most of the toys were..useless? Originally I gave her about 1/2 of them that I thought made sense. But it was just too overwhelming for her to manage so she now has 12pcs (including the case!)
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For the record we live in the SAME TOWN! It’s less than a 10min drive between houses!! The ONLY time any of my in laws see our kids is when WE bring them over. 5 years of this bullshit. We’re done. It’s going to be nice not having so many of the same family get togethers!
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-My kids each get 1 snack bowl a day, so as long as it’s a dry snack I reuse the bowl for their next snack time! Otherwise I was using like 8 bowls a day that all seemed barely even dirty. Bowls get rinsed & set on the drying rack until next snack!
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Do you have to pay for you & your family’s (ie you, your spouse & child(ren)) food/plates at a FAMILY party?¿?¿ We we’re told there was a party for my MIL birthday, we showed up, they cooked burgers, salad & baked potatoes. CHARGED US $35. Tell me I’m wrong for being so upset…
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Damn ya’ll really mad that I spent time w my kids huh? 😂
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Our photographer told Olivia to whisper in Santa’s ear what she wanted and she said it LOUD AND CLEAR instead, it was so cute 🥺😭
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Pre school teacher asked for play doh donations, say less girl I GOT YOU!🩷 Teachers do not get paid nearly enough, and for what they do?! As long as I’m able I will always contribute whatever my kids teachers need.
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At the end of the night after I’ve wrangled two toddlers for 13hrs and they’re finally in bed I just want to be Jessica. I don’t want to be a mom or a wife. I don’t want anyone to need me or to touch me. But I don’t get that. I’m the only one that wakes up with the baby at night.
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My parents bought me a 1990 Grand Am in 2010 & it lasted a year before totally shitting the bed & I needed to buy a new car. We will definitely be buying our kids reliable, used cars. They will also definitely be working to pay for the gas or insurance. We’ll cover the other
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He works 9-5, I SAHM 9-5
We both parent & take care of our shared home 5p-9a
All I’m saying is if you agreed to be a SAHM, then you should expect to be doing it alone. That’s just my opinion.
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Do you purchase/coordinate your parent in laws Christmas gift? This is the first year I told him to purchase his parents gifts himself, I’m just doing TOO much and with 7 days until Christmas he still hasn’t purchased anything. Not my problem lmao
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My child is 4, this is a highly inappropriate candy and amount to give to her. No one in our house will eat these. She gave them to my child because she herself doesn’t eat them anymore and probably just didn’t want them around her room. Hope that helps 😘
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My 2 nieces(4 & 7)are sleeping over for the first time for my daughter’s 5th birthday and this is what I’ve been waiting for!!! Auntie hosting a sleepover!! Each girl has an LOL Doll, LOL pajamas, matching BFF lockets, play doh mix ins, a coloring pack & bubbles🥰
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She hates me sooooo much but she’s seeking out my alt account that she never even followed me on. After she blocked me on my main and every other social media back in Feb. What an obsessed fucking weirdo.
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“Someone brought this to my attention” lol okay baby keep stalking me 😘
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I can’t stand a “30min is too far to drive” person but maybe that’s just the Chicago in me lmao
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Made the cutest little basket for O’s pre k teacher! 🍎🖍️🌈✨
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I absolutely ate shit going down stairs earlier and my tail bone hurts so bad but I can’t stop laughing at the terrified run my 1.5yo does 🤣
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4yo gets out of pre k at 12
18mo typically naps at 12
Day 3 of school, I got the baby to fall asleep in the car (he sleeps through being transferred inside) only for him to sleep 20min before his sister got in the car & started being loud 🙃 it’s going yo be a long school year!
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O has been potty trained since Nov, just wearing pull ups at night. She wakes up dry 99% of the time so I didn’t buy a new box this month. Last night was her first night without a pull up & shes dry! She wakes us up once/twice a night to go to the bathroom. She’s so big now 🥹😭
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This is an iced coffee no matter the weather stan account
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I stay my ass out of twitter drama and you know why? Bc sometimes I think “oh yeah I agree w that” then the person gets dragged and I get to learn from the sidelines why that way of thinking was wrong and can change my ways w/o ever looking fucking stupid lmao
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like mouth guards or lose weight (doctor said it would help, not me) or anything! So honestly most nights he ends up getting kicked to the couch. I’m up so often during the night that his snoring makes it soooo hard to fall back asleep. I feel like idk what else to do.
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My fav kitchen kitchen hack, love love love having the big set out of the drawer!
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omg she’s so pretty 😍 guess it was worth the 2 month wait and one cancelled order 🙃
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WHAT THE FUCK YOU GUYS I did not even know what or if I should respond but I knew I needed to let OP know none of this was okay 😩
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Never in my life have I heard of this?! In my family it’s more like everyone brings something and everyone eats…right…?
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I went out of my comfort zone at the gym this morning, TWICE! 🤩 I finally started using weight machines and even took a picture in the gym, not just the bathroom 😌🖤
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Parents! Here’s you’re reminder that the holiday season is ✨quickly✨ approaching. Keep an eye on the toys your kids do & don’t play with over the next 2 months so come December figuring out what to donate won’t be so hard!
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Maybe it’s just me but I will never understand the “let me set up my camera and video tape myself crying” thing lmao
Okay well first of all, those are cupcakes, so jot THAT down
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My 4yo is going to FREAK when she sees this Sally dress after school!
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Our 1.5yo has been in his bedroom w our 4.5yo for a few weeks now and we finally upgraded him to a big boy bed and this is how our daughter wanted their beds🥹 I just freaking love those tiny humans SO FUCKING MUCH🥰💖
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See also the smiley face she drew on my frame like 2 weeks ago, so cute!! How could I even be mad? He gets to stay forever 🥰
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