ive gained a total of 16kg, had a panic attack and hyperventilated in front of all my housemates, im not allowed to leave the clinic, i have daily headaches and now i keep getting nosebleeds. im so, so tired

sorry for inactivity, i feel unworthy of being on this account because im not 'sick enough' for not relapsing despite feeling like shit. im going through a lot and im trying to go back home but my clinic wont let me leave and im on the edge. love you guys <3

someone at the clinic has been leaving bloody bandaids and tissues in our shared trash can and of course all fucking eyes were on me when someone was scolding the group not to do it but it wasnt me cause im clean and now i feel like shit lolololol

so overwhelmed i had a meltdown and broke down crying once i heard the midnight fireworks! happy new year

i wish all financially stable people disappeared cause i cant talk about how ive always wanted an ipad but cant justify the price without someone going "lol its just a tablet just buy it!" ok sorry joe but i dont have the means to casually spend 700 bucks

tw sh Literally just made an account completely separate from this one just for myself to follow art and this is my tl after only following literal bl artists. What the fuck man

ik its not a big deal but its the first time Ive lost my period to stress and not being uw, and even at uw i barely lost it. i don't think my therapists understand that I'm not sh'ing because I literally don't even have the energy for my one fucking coping mechanism

any artist oomfs/non oomfs...i have done zero research into this its just some thought i always have when i see posts abt this,, pls tell me someone gets it or maybe im just completely wrong

"loyalty to my bestie!!" sorry i am snitching so hard loyalty my ass if youre cheating for no reason then i dont want u as a friend gtfo

Today staff and therapists said i need to "talk less and work more" when i explained that i dont want to do this treatment and i want to go home. They said i just keep giving out excuses. Do i have to pack my bags and leave on my own? Is that what they're trying to achieve?

i keep getting the feeling that im missing a "thrill" in life. a negative one. i need to put myself in a dangerous situation, i need to do drugs, i need to walk into traffic, i need to leave everything behind and run away. its getting louder every day, i feel empty

im mostly using them for hands/feet but i wanna have some on my lap or inside my jacket and i have scars everywhere so idk if it would impact it a lot

@moony_33333 Almond mom evolved to pea mom

honestly? have the ideal body shape/fat distribution. in this day and age, you can be any weight from uw to ow and still be considered hot as long as you carry said weight well. i can handle being fat if my fat goes to the right places

i wanna unfollow my dead friend on some social media cause her name pops up in my mutuals/recommendations sometimes and it fucking breaks me every time but i cant bring myself to do it aaafdhfdaha

@pcnyo123 i did this with no onion, 6% coconut milk from the jumbo, and for the rice i did 50/50 white rice and cauliflower rice (even less cals if its just cauliflower rice but doesnt taste as good) its low cal + vegetarian and generally healthy !!