🥢⁷ | meg bias
@uhgoodboy
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nsfw bts rpf writer ! • #OT7 mostly but i write all ships • sub koo enthusiast ! • 18+ ONLY ! MINORS DON'T FOLLOW OR INTERACT • pls read my rules and guidelines
he/him • 29yo • i'm black :)
Joined March 2022
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shit doms say in my fics: “open up that hungry hole wider for me baby u can do it i’ve got u”
shit my dom actually says to me irl: “if ur so hungry for cock how about u try earning it by eating some fucking food”
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remember there are only two appropriate april fools pranks to play on ur twitter community my friends:
1) claiming a thread will be pictures of min yoongi when actually it’s pictures of cats
2) claiming a thread will be pictures of cats when actually it’s pictures of min yoongi
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idk if this is comforting to anyone anxious/upset ab the new “view counter” thing but. my sister has a priv that she uses as a diary. i’m the *only* follower, no one else. saw a new tweet for the first time on there just now, and it said it had 27 views. don’t take ‘em too srsly!
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Its a fact that soulmates form a telepathic link when they first make eye contact. Namjoon and Yoongi can speak to each other in their minds. It's a fact, but it’s not the point. They’ve been doing that for thirteen years, who cares?
The point is that Namjoon's mind is /filthy/.
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todays nsfw first thought best thought is
#jikook
who are both super giggly and ticklish during sex. high on love and high on the feel of each other’s skin, all deep kisses broken up by soft laughter and sharp whines of “deeper… d-deeper, ohh right… *giggle* … right there—ah!”
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anyways ima get locked up for this so excuse my ot7 delulu-ness and pls know i’m not serious but.
song titled “seven” and it’s about being in love and fucking raw and happens to be completely in english with not one gender indicator dare i say it might be about six handsome men-
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we need to talk about the dangers of polyamory and by “polyamory” i do mean sleeping in a puppy pile of ppl who r all in love with each other and by “dangers” i do mean lack of ability to ever get up and have a productive day.
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// cw: trans ftm jimin (cock and vagina both used), open polyamory, yoonmin are married, minjoon are primary partners, vmin are vmin, taegiminjoon are all in a relationship but this is jimin focused, dysphoria, mental illness, menstruation with blood mentions, many gender feels
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didn’t even know this was a thing i’m so deep in peaceful gay army space now that i thought we all just went “neat!” as a collective
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having a community of kinky friends is so funny smh one of my fwb's doms said to "give kaine a kiss from me" and that dom always just gently kisses my cheek and my fwb like full tongue kissed me on the mouth and i jokingly texted and snitched to their dom that the kiss i got did+
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#namkook
• nsfw • primal omegaverse
// cw: arranged mating, culturally normalized
unnegotiated sex between strangers, somno, omegas have dicks + pussies, pining, heat sex, breeding kink, omegas can get pregnant (no mpreg in this thread tho), au is eventual omega jk x everyone
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“this feels so scandalous now,” hoseok says with teeth bared in a wide smile — head tilted back to let yoongi’s tongue trace the line of his adam’s apple, slow but hungry.
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// tmi
i have officially dubbed this the most hilarious polyamory moment of my life thus far:
husband just came home to be greeted w the sight of our (shared) bf actively fingering me. stood there. took it in. sighed. and said “[bf’s name], take ur damn hand out of my pocket.”
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"y'all need to stop babying jungkook" first of all thats my biological infant son who i grew in my actual physical womb and i'll raise him how i want with the help of his six other dads yes that includes spoiling him yes that includes babying him get out of my family's business??
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cw // enlistment, platonic ot7, canon idol verse, sj centric for obv reasons
The first time they’d talked in any significant detail about doing it, they’d actually been talking about /not/ doing it. Or, to be precise — they’d been talking about /not/ not doing it.
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back in my days we said “he’s naked” and it was a sliver of skin peeking out from his tattoo concealing oven mitt
back in my days we said "hes naked" and it was his forehead how are we living like this now
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jm could deadass make a song titled “i’m neither cis nor straight” and some of y’all would literally be out here talm bout “nothing about this directly states that he’s gay or trans so pls pay attention to only exactly what’s said not what ur sick confused mind thinks is implied”
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what i understand of the facts: hsk’s military division was randomly selected for a trial to see how they do w more cell phone access / more time w their phones overall so he gets WAY more phone usage
what i think Really happened: *chelsea boots click clacking in the distance*
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good news everyone i accidentally found a smoke shop full of queer poc employees who all literally just got into an argument behind the counter about who got to help me bc they all liked my hoodie and wanted to talk to me about it???
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*grabs megaphone*
WHO IS GOING TO WRITE MORE FICS WITH CORRECTIONS GIVEN IN SECRET CODES THAT REQUIRE NO SPOKEN WORDS AT ALL
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hobi to his new military bros probably: gay? no no. not me. i’m totally straight. my ideal woman? hmm… someone who looks, smells, speaks, and fucks like park jimin. especially that last part haha it’s hard being away from home am i right boys? anyway besides that i’m not picky!!
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there are thirty seven different types of pirate ship
pick one. ask me how many crewmates it takes to sail successfully. ask me if they sleep in cots or hammocks. ask me how many masts and sails it has. ask me if it's equipped w cannons. ask me how fast it is.
i know the answer
do you research for your fics? If so, how deep of a rabbit hole have you gone until now?
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not seem like it was actually from him, and he told me to tap my fwb twice on the neck with two fingers and i was like okay weird but sure let's give it a go and my fwb literally froze, blinked, straightened up their entire posture, and very gently kissed me on the cheek instead
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this is how i pictured the layout of jungkooks apartment before he started inviting us over for 4am hangouts
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« You’re atheist. »
At least Yoongi’s energy still feels amused.
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the girls in short shorts = slut narrative combined w the boys in short shorts = gay narrative really leans toward the conclusion that the human leg, on its own, no matter whose leg it is, functions primarily for the purpose of seducing and entrapping a human man. no other reason
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one thing about bangtan that makes me so confused when ppl aren’t ot7 enthusiasts is that … there IS no ship that one single night of deep diving into clips for won’t make u a firm enthusiast of. and seeing a ship that for smth and feeling like “idk just don’t see it” is fine
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// significantly more tmi
also to clarify this wasn’t like a angry stop fingering my man moment he um. gave me a lil kiss to say hi. gave our bf a lil kiss to say hi. *cough* licked our bf’s hand clean. and then told him to put it back. so ANYWAY pls know there was no malice 😅
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It’s a feeling that hormonally induced or not, Namjoon is certain, instantly, that of all the omegas he has ever had - of all of the omegas he has ever /met/ in his life time - only Jungkook is actually /worth/.
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as a super feminine preferring but masculine identifying medically ftm transgender worm the goal of being on t and getting gender affirming procedures to pass as cis male is about being able to then dress in girly things and have ppl go "that's a crossdresser" not "that's a lady"
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// cw: heavy implications of severe depression
———
the breeze nearly sends the playing cards flying the first time yoongi takes a seat across from namjoon on the front porch. he’d brought them from inside, presumably.
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i closed a 1.6 million dollar deal at work today which makes my company ab $10,000 in one transaction (as opposed to the usual $200-$1200) and everyone at work is hyping me up but idk how to accept praise so i keep just giving them a thumbs up in response and i feel very awkward
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today i'd like to present you with "things my literal actual this-is-the-highest-up-the-chain-of-command-you-can-get-until-you-hit-the-ceo" boss has said during training in my first week of work at this company that let me know i'm gonna be happy working for him for a long time.
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that awkward moment when ur colleagues are all hype to introduce u to a coworker bc u both listed kpop in ur interests so u let them video call u to be a good/normal person and their entire room is covered in bp posters and they politely change the subject when u say ur army 😂
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me thinking i am being v sexy & spontaneous as i creep into me & my husbands office w intentions to seduce him: heyyy
him, not looking up: almost done this email lay down on the couch
me: what?
him: if i turn around ur gonna be naked, right?
me: …
him: lay down on the couch
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bf: u okay?
me: my pre-bed routine got interrupted and it seems off but i can’t remember what i didn’t do and it’s freaking me out bc i feel like i’m standing here in the mirror looking right AT it
bf: so u see ur reflection?
me: yes
bf: …crystal clear?
me: OH!! i can SEE!!
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after two and a half weeks straight of sleeping with the girl every night except for one night and fucking the girl every day except for two days …
we are out on our first date 😳
she looks so pretty and the place i picked is so lovely and i’m so excited to spoil her rotten 😵💫
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okay but which one like i wanna hear more about the impersonation details bc imagine being like “it me 🥺 your hope 🥺 pwease shend the files 🥺❤️” and going to prison for half ur life
A 28 year-old man was sentenced to prison after he pretended to be a BTS member to acquire their unreleased music files.
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yikes this is gonna get me cussed out i bet but i'm just gonna go ahead and say - whether ur a fan acc or not, pls can we do smth to avoid trending things like "n0t 875" in moments like this. i get that army wants to be supportive +
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so i did sex stuff today for the first time w someone who for a Long time everyone i knew assumed i was doing sex stuff w even tho i wasn’t & we both had this moment where we just looked at e/o and went “guess all the rumors are true” & i just wonder if vmin had that same conver—
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me, nudging my partner awake: my brain is doing the thing where when i close my eyes it invents extremely visually detailed monsters again
partner: mm, c’mere baby
me: this time it’s this Long woma-
partner: don’t. describe it. i can rock u to sleep but ur demons r Not invited
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// cw: trans ftm jimin, open polyamory, mental illness, implications of alcoholism, yoonmin focused
———
the first time yoongi asks, he’s two fingers deep in jimin’s cunt — curled upward the way he loves it best, in that spot that makes his eyes water when it’s fucked just right.
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me: *gently playing w my bf’s privates while we cuddle & watch tv bc everything’s squishy & soft & textured*
bf: how much do u think our intimacy would change if we were neurotypical
me: idk y
bf: it’s the kinda thing that comes to mind when someone’s using ur ballsack to stim
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nothing is more hilarious than watching army collectively wipe away tears and sit in trembling wide eyed silence to try and pretend not to have seen smth that has already wrecked everyone entirely
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anyway yoongi was perfect big shout out to the group right in front of me who reassured me they wouldn’t let anyone push forward to fill the gap when my v overwhelmed and v overstimulated autistic ass curled up on the floor and had a full meltdown in the pit after soundcheck :D
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adult responsibilities suck and building my dream mansion to live in with my husband min yoongi on the sims does not suck do u see the problem with trying to be a grown up and owning a laptop? it’s impossible.
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owner: WELCOME how can i help u
employee 1: no i’ll help u
owner: no stop that i got it
employee 2: i wanted to help him
owner: no u—
employee 2: WHAT R U LOOKING FOR TODAY I LIKE UR JUJUTSU KAISEN HOODIE
owner: go away we’re already talking! who is ur favorite character??
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just watched my sister’s husband put gochujang on cheesecake bc he thought it was strawberry syrup but he’s trying to be a manly man and pretend that’s not what he did and he’s just sitting here eating gochujang cheesecake pretending that’s not what he’s doing should i speak
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the judges on masterchef: it’s lacking in acidity
me, watching masterchef: what does that even mean
me today, making sauce: why does it taste thick even tho it’s so thin
me: oh i forgot the lime juice
me: wait is it… is it LACKING IN ACIDITY?? IS THAT WHAT THAT TASTES LIKE??
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tmi but i’ve been on a pussy bender for like 3-4 days and the girl i’ve been fucking squirts allllll over my sheets every fucking day and i’m 100% out of clean sheets now but when i tell u i can not bring myself to care ab that in the slightest
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me: i just want to lay on my tummy and have kim namjoon lay on my back and press down with his full body weight and squish his arms under me to wrap them around my chest and squeeze me as hard as he can for as long as he’s willing and able to
my sister: u NEED a weighted blanket
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literally dildo shopping and there’s a review on a literal dildo saying “these are nicely colored in pink and blue indicating they can be used by women and men” and i just … UR ALREADY BUYING A LITERAL SILICONE PENIS I PROMISE NOBODY THINKS UR STRAIGHTER FOR GETTING THE BLUE ONE
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not to parent shame when i’ve never biologically produced another human but if ur in public w two of ur kids who r pretty much the same age and i can tell which of ur kids is ur favorite kid based on how u And the rest of ur family treats the other kid i’m side eyeing pretty hard
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me and my bf showering together while staying w literally anyone: alas, the perfect opportunity for a filthy fuck!
me and my bf showering together at our house: alas, the perfect opportunity for a high risk near death slippery and dangerous dance off slash karaoke night!
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got a few dm’s ab my gf’s pronouns and i dont wanna have numerous convos about it so ima just tweet this and link ppl back here 😬
he uses—
masc pronouns: he/him/his
femme relationship indicators, endearments, and titles: girlfriend/babygirl/mommy
ty for coming to my ted talk
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i love that cats, w their four legs and their furry bodies and their tails and their non speech… look at humans and go “thassa big ass dumb ass cat”
but look at dogs, w Their four legs and Their furry bodies and Their tails and Their non speech… and go “wut the FUCK is this?”
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me: i need nsfw advice
friend: k
me: so [bf] likes waking me up by fucking me but we keep fighting ab it
friend: wait… w/o CONSENT??
me: NO??
friend: thank GOD
me: HE MOVES MY STUFFIES OFF THE BED LIKE THEY HAVENT BEEN PART OF THIS FAMILY LONGER THAN HIM
friend: i hate u
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in a LESS delulu way,,
‘seven’ is the PERFECT evolution of ‘my time’
like. wow.
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i don’t care for the fact that a man can hurt jk’s feelings and get hugged by jm years later where as i, myself, have only ever loved and adored jk and am currently living without jm hugs. yes i’m being petty. but burger-refusal-man is not forgiven by ME no matter who hugs him 😤
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i know everyone’s sad and i apologize for being enlistment immune in the middle of ur solemn military wife tl but hobi’s hair is so cute and i’m so excited to see everyone else’s ngl like hoseok and seokjin both look so adorable and i’ve been a buzzcut joon truther ALL MY LIFE 😭
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vmin’s public foreplay for their upcoming face-release-day-fuck-fest is getting a little out of hand pls just send e/o ur nudes directly some of us r dehydrated and have no more overwhelmed tears to offer
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cw // fwb taekook , open polyamory , side vmin , side jinkook mentions , bdsm , d/s , accidental subspace , daddy kink , heavy mentions of breathplay , light conversational mention of a Lot of other kinks , trans ftm jk (pussy used) , th reads more manipulative in this than he is
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// cw: trans ftm jimin, open polyamory, mental illness, fwb jihope focused w Many little side ship cameos, possibly confusing timeline
———
hoseok is twenty two, and jimin is twenty one, and this monday it’s halloween. the blanket is on hoseok’s left shoulder, and jimin’s right.
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i Genuinely think it’s bc at this point what is even left to the imagination to fantasize? taehyung literally gets on live like “army :(( i miss my jiminie’s sweet deep wet kisses on the mouth” and jimin be in the replies like “hehehe if u come here i’ll kiss more than ur mouth~”
It'll never make sense to me that vmin is the least popular maknaeline ship
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some day it will be 50 years into the future and the only three people left that are still writing bts fanfics will be me jeon jungkook and min yoongi
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i’m also still sitting on an extreme kink wip that i just don’t know if i’ll ever feel comfy posting so y’all gotta let me know how u feel about 100% animalistic and nonverbal hybrids that ur really, really, Really not supposed to fuck getting frisky w their human owners sometime
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is it fucked up to say ur own fic bc it’s pirate au and i feel like everyone knows that
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tmrw i’ll finally be back to writing! i’m just gonna do a half day bc it’s my first writing day since the injury, but i’m really excited about it and hopefully it goes well and i can get back to writing every day and haven’t ruined the habit for myself by going nearly a month w/o
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it’s 2023 it’s time to stop giving cis men a gold star for just Wearing a dress or skirt and start giving a fuck how they style them im sick of seeing the crowd go wild for ugly dresses just bc there’s a penis under there
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y’know as a 100% platonic “that’s my baby brother” jungkook lover i can already tell the next few weeks of my social media life r gonna be very hilarious for me and i’m kinda looking forward to watching y’all slowly dissolve into absolute insanity ngl
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even more hilarious — anderson paak after SERVING HIM ALCOHOL DOUBLE CHECKED BC HE DID *NOT* THINK YOONGI WAS 21 😩
anderson paak thought that yoongi was TWENTY ONE and called him a BABY
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taehyung, and yoongi, and namjoon – they stay because they’re his and he's /theirs/, no matter what color the toilet paper turns. they love him hard, and when life gets hard ... they love him even harder.
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i feel i’ve done The Girl a disservice by ONLY talking ab her pussy.
she’s also a good person. and very pretty. and has absolutely stunning (even if currently Quite bruised) tiddies.
oh! and she can read! see? kaine values women who read. alert the press i’m not just an animal.
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me: hold on my boss is calling
my grandmother: u keep using a world that i’ll never like
me: “boss”?
her: yes
me: ya ur a taurus so u don’t really vibe w the concept of subservience
her: no i’ve hated that word since childhood
me: …how long do u think you’ve been a taurus?
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healthy relationships lowkey aren’t perfect bc i be wanting to have angry sex w my man so bad but that nigga is literally never mad at me for more than 10min. like he takes space, cools down, and patiently explains what upset him IMMEDIATELY so we never get the time to fuck ab it
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yoongi, definitely: so where tf is My cool guitar from a friendly white man wtf i can at least Play guitar
yoongi, definitely: a guitar gifted and signed by all the members is still better tho 😌💅
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smth funny ab being pansexual Specifically that i think gays And straights don't get is that when ppl say there's a body part or a gender that they're just not attracted to i get so genuinely confused by how that's even possible like i think to myself "but have u seen... people?"
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idk how many of u guys r gonna be at the prudential center show but if yoongi performs the last the sheer hydrostatic pressure of the squirt that's gonna shoot out of me is gonna launch me all the way to the moon and rain down on u like a storm y'all might wanna bring an umbrella
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they laugh bc they amuse each other. they laugh bc they trust each other. they laugh bc they feel good, and make each other feel good. they laugh bc their sex is /fun/ together; intimate and vulnerable and cotton candy sweet — they laugh bc they’re happy, and so, /so/ in love.
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“you’ll move in with me too? i can… i can wake up next to you? over and over? for the rest of my life?”
yoongi asks it so quietly, so /vulnerably/ that jimin rushes forward to kiss him.
“over and over,” he confirms. “for the rest of our lives.”
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i think 24hr post-scene check-ins r a highly under utilized thing in fics based around bdsm clubs / pro domming / ethically kinky sex encounters.
so me being myself ima talk about ‘em real quick and try to get the ball rolling w a thread later maybe :>
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@HobiWon_Kenobi
no fr this has been my thought all day gimme fanchants to learn i’ll practice 😭😭
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this isn't a thread but i can't stop envisioning pirate!taehyung lounging on the beach of ink blot with jimin and jungkook and a plump basket of ripe fruit from all three of their childhoods while they bicker ab which are more tasty and kiss the juice from e/o's lips k bye thanks
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namjoon is so thoughtful and sexy and considerate and big dicked and intelligent and delicious and good
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all i’ve said about this woman’s vagina all day on this acc and when she gets on twt today and reads it back what does she say?
“i can’t believe u exposed me for not drinking water”
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on todays episode of adhd nonsense, i need to get my guest bedroom ready for my guests.
so far i have:
- accumulated 2k exp on duo lingo
- gone to target
- gone to the liquor store
- SERIOUSLY considered trying to bake a loaf of bread from scratch for the first time in my life
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having a partner’s location on is sooo not ab them cheating or lying for me like me keeping tabs on where u r is 100% just so that when i get the clingy urge to be like “what r u doing 🥺” for the third time in a single day i can simply look at my phone and go “ah ur at the bank”
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so my next thread on here is an open polyam au that i've been building in my head for Months and i'm starting it smack in the middle of the storyline bc i think it'd be more fun to just do low-priority snippets of it than build a linear universe, lmk how y'all like it!
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as an autistic i was today years old when i learned that for many the motive and follow thru behind stealing ur partner’s big sweaters / hoodies is typically “it’s urs so i want it with me when ur gone to remind me of u” not “it’s comfy and cozy and u love me so u let me have it”
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i like that when i say things like “i think i might need someone to fuck me real quick so i can mentally turn a corner from reading smut to engaging with the real world” my boyfriend just nods like a solemn old man and says to meet him upstairs after he’s done with his tea like??
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