Sakshi Shivdasani
@ughshutupsakshi
Followers
39,713
Following
21
Media
73
Statuses
2,110
one day I’ll voice a cartoon character and millions of people will find my voice annoying instead of thousands🥰🥰
Mumbai, India
Joined July 2020
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my grandparents ran away and got married at 18 only to raise a kid that doesn’t allow his 24 yo daughter to go for sleepovers chee ya
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all our tax money going straight toward beard oil
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the guy who writes zomato notifications deserves a raise
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you can’t always be the prettiest girl in the room but u can always be the most annoying
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my boyfriend isn’t allowed to light diyas i am the light of his life
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bro i literally posted about how loud firecrackers are unpleasant at 12 midnight and people are telling me to leave the country??? hahahah
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you tell ur parents you want a dog and they say ‘we already have you’ OK but who do i have
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my sister is covid positive and i’ve been using it as an excuse to stay at home when people ask me to come out but she lives in canada hahahah
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can’t believe ncb was gonna check aryan khans chats so srk shut down whatsapp
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4 girls from my school have had their roka meanwhile i’ve literally had my 4th dhoka
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why are delhi people so proud of their winter like what have u contributed to the weather
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my mans ex followed me for a day and then unfollowed me sis we literally have the same taste kya pasand nahi aaya
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i am living proof that the indian education system is a fail bc i got like really good grades but am actually dumb as shit
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23 years ago two idiots decided to go raw and now i have to live
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i just got verified so whatever i tweet is obviously legit um the earth is flat
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loud fire crackers are so unpleasant like pls stop
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when ur parents don’t mind u marrying the boy of ur choice but the boy of ur choice minds marrying u
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my takeaway from watching indian matchmaking is that my kids may or may not have a better life in the US but they will def have a better personality in india
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u ever lay in bed and break ur own heart by overthinking
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dads be yelling at you for never being at home sir you weren’t there for my entire childhood please
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i have gotten two skinny shaming comments and two fat shaming comments today can people make up their minds so i can decide what to have for lunch accordingly
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‘if my career doesn’t work out i’ll just become a stripper’
babe idk how to tell u but that’s n o t an easy job
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If I change my name to condom will men stop using me
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people who share beds w their significant other: where does your laptop sleep
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my toxic trait is not confronting people when they do smth to upset me and just slowly phasing them out of my life 🥴🥴
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nothing is more powerful than a kid w one gujarati and one sindhi parent in mumbai during college admissions
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also i manifested this so basically i’m a marketing genius and y’all are dumb
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yo brooo who got you crying like thatt??? living w my parents
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feel like dating an engineer bc if they can understand so much math they can def understand my feelings
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being a hot girl is a mind thing not a body thing
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i love mumbai’s lockdown strategy they just dug up all the roads so people don’t feel like stepping out only
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broo?? so i’m setting up a house and it’s so frustrating like the men working on the house do not give a single fuck about anything i say they’ll ask my male broker/my male partner/my male dog for approval before they do anything i say like excuse me?? i’m right here
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meme pages being like her content is cringe bro ur content is literally just reposting my content with a reaction meme please if it wasn’t for me u wouldn’t have content sit tf down
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good morning ladies just remember there’s someone out there who thinks ur super hot and that someone is prolly my boyfriend he will like ur ig pictures as well :)
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bro chalo i’ll acknowledge my voice is annoying now can y’all acknowledge loud fireworks are annoying
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omg yest was childrens day happy childrens day to all the kids i’ve swallowed
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this talking to the moon reel trend where people zoom into their school like yuck if someone shows me my school i will vomit
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if by ‘be a patakha’ you mean be loud and irritating and a nuisance then i am a patakha
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last night i was at this restaurant and some guy was like omg dude that chick is an influencer and i turned around bc i also wanted to see the influencer but he was talking about me
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february morning routine:
1. play the wordle
2. play the globle game
3. see what kanye has posted on instagram
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i swear boys drive like they’re auditioning for dhoom 4
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my sister has lost 15 kgs since the pandemic and i have lost my hair and my sanity
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tomorrow that one person is gonna be like ‘ohhh??? i didn’t even realise anything was down hahah i was living my best life i don’t even check my phone that much !!!!!’ and im gonna scream
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started talking to a boy last april fools day he is now my bf this prank has gone too far when do i tell him
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Why talk to ur dad when you can slam ur head against the wall and experience the same thing🥰
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it’s like you buy jeans and SUDDENLY u don’t have tops u buy tops u don’t have dresses WHWRE DOES IT END
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the feminine urge to leave the city and start a new life where nobody knows u
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how do i explain to everyone that i want a wedding not a marriage
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fashion bloggers be like HOW TO ELEVATE UR OUTFIT!! first thing grab a blazer and trousers and silk shirt and gold accessories bro woh sab hi toh nahi hai na humaare paas
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i mean thank you for sponsoring my life qt
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whoever said atoms were the smallest thing in the world clearly never saw my tiddies
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me randomly: do u think karan johar will launch me if he thinks i’m aftab shivdasani’s daughter is it nepo enough
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does ur family also fight in the car on the way to places or are u normal
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why is NOT FUNNY trending in india i didn’t even post anything that went viral today
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if a man goes missing and you put his actual height on the missing poster he will magically reappear and go like ACTUALLY I AM actual height + 2 inches
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life’s too short to pretend to be interested in a football club just because your boyfriend is
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‘anybody can be a content creator’ ok then do it bestie we will collab
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dan and blair was the WORST plot of gossip girl
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at first i was like ‘i have no friends’ as a joke but BRO i don’t think it’s a joke anymore
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yikes nobody ever texts me so i didn’t even realise whatsapp was down for a bit
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bitches be ordering one new york style cheesecake and put 🇺🇸|🇮🇳 in their bio
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how do people play hard to get lmao some of us are hard to want
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a casting agent once told me my face is too big for my body and my nose is too big for my face so the voice comments are rlly not going to affect me
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me for the next 2 weeks: hey sorry i had replied but i think that day whatsapp was down so you didn’t receive it
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if zomato released smth like a spotify wrapped it would be so embarrassing
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shower sex is whack asf did you even ask me if this is my hair wash day??
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wishing u guys nice juicy thicc booties this new years
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do boys actually think they are subtle when they check someone out
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why is everyone getting married except my boyfriend
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bro period trackers are great i was ready to slap a bitch and flo sent me a notification that i shouldn’t be alarmed if i feel extra grumpy today this is like a horoscope wow
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is twitter getting banned it was the first platform to verify me and i am emotional
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an upgrad course where they teach everyone on shark tank how to pronounce entrepreneur
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if
@spotifyindia
hired me to do their ads i bet so many people would buy spotify premium honestly i think it’ll be a great deal for them
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imagine being in a relationship w a delhi boy and during a fight he asks u if u know who his dad is lmao nooo bc you don’t introduce me to ur family
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if u think buying condoms are embarrassing try buying this at 11 am in the morning😭😭
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these crypto boys are always like ‘did u see what elon musk tweeted’ mf ive been subtweeting you for 3 days did u see that??
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i’ve been doing the daily wordle since the last couple months + watching shark tank everyday i really feel like im earning my twitter verification now
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i bought 8 thongs and got a bikini wax and got laid 0 times this month what the fuck
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i just want you to know that if I ever said men are trash I meant it
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why tattoo someone’s name on ur body when u can just tattoo chutiya on ur forehead and give the same message
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my friend just returned after 2 years in the US and she asked me why we cant go to juhu beach in our swimsuits like bitch shut the f up i can’t deal w this today or ever really
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Brown boys saying she belongs to the streets like they don’t stand in every empty galli to smoke cigarettes and drink chai every evening like YOU belong to the streets
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all the jonas brothers are so in love w their wives i want it
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change my name to dhol and bang me while tunak tunak tun plays in the bg
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my bf is actually rlly smart but whenever he tries to explain smth to me my brain automatically goes haa chal chal baap ko mat sikha
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should i get tattoos under my tits that say big tiddies it’ll be such a fun party joke
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i tweeted ab how my dad was absent thru my childhood and everyone’s like btw he was working hard for your family okkk my mom also worked full time???? + my dad sees my twitter and he says ‘but he found it quite funny’
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shaving your legs before your long distance boyfriend comes so that he can feel a leg with prickly stubble instead of soft hair <<<< big L everytime
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stalking bella hadid is so fun like do i want the outfit or do i want the body
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i got so drunk last night i couldn’t find my phone and i’ve gone down in my building to look for it while holding my phone in my hand for the flashlight happy diwali
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honestly i would rather live in a world inhabited by zombies than crypto bros
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