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tom crisp Profile
tom crisp

@tomjc09

Followers
492
Following
1,137
Media
628
Statuses
7,497

of a woke persuasion 22 • he/him

Joined May 2015
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
10 months
number one listener of lonesome cowboy bill on last fm in 2023, you’ll never sing that
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 months
and if a bukayo saka bus, crashes into us
@bukayothinker
ʚ♡ɞ
3 months
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
8 months
i mean come on
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
8 months
thinking about the time i went to school on world book day in a custom made rat costume complete with tail and rat head that my dad made in a day and lost out on the voucher to a girl who wore a cardboard beak and was hedwig from harry potter.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 months
@ted_pen first of all deal with subway and their bizarre “tap the side” rubbish
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
7 months
@francesweetman @waitmanb i took it up with wikipedia and they said you were wrong
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
10 months
@sophierebeccaf my dog BLADE would never hurt a fly.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
5 years
@2jasg @ToryFibs @itvpeston @Jess__Taylor__ @Peston @ITV incredible sentiment from someone with a 'stop brexit' profile picture
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
8 months
thinking about the time i went to school on world book day in a custom made rat costume complete with tail and rat head that my dad made in a day and lost out on the voucher to a girl who wore a cardboard beak and was hedwig from harry potter.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
@spencermorgan93 @taylorbone022 the womens game is equivalent to referring to 'the mens game' not football as 'a mans game' pretty clear and important distinction imo
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
compare christies choice of bournemouth in the championship over burnley in the prem to roberts' comments about running more than everyone and earning his place at burnley, i know who i'd rather have #twitterclarets
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
10 months
@burndtjambontop i made these in 2019 lol, great minds
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
7 months
@OliverPostingLs favourite worst nightmare is the first one that came to mind that fits this category
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
11 months
@PlayerJuan96 @meme_space_nine clearly not anything to do with cash, if you actually watched his video youd see that hes donating all the money the video makes to creators that were plagiarised
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
9 months
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 months
@frankandrews__ i considered it but i decided as a sentancd it made more sense with an article so went for it regardless of ruining the rhythm :)
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
not sure how many #twitterclarets agree with it but i think holding onto dwight would be huge for us next season
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 months
@rjb_1998 cant decide whether putting ‘musician’ or ‘ed sheeran’ on the chart would be funnier. thinking maybe they got it right.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
@SadSonya4 @KatyMontgomerie reads to me like transphobia
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
8 months
@danlehnermusic this is my personal favourite
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
@Common2021Sense @StVincentGrad23 @BBCNews its not identical because the photos are taken from different angles at different times, use some common sense
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 year
@theblastedheath @gem_ste im not sure that you can be excessive when it comes to something as dangerous as mains electricity
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
10 months
@ValiantAmi @Staroxvia think the question is more geared towards the irish nation rather than the actions of irish people in the US
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 year
@superlameballs wouldnt the moon always look pretty big through a high powered telescope?
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
@JoeStephenson96 accidentally asked for henry at a nightclub and got a free jacket potato
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
8 months
@thrasheraxe i dont think its an exaggeration to say this is the moment that my disillusionment with democracy began
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
@andrew97175351 @BurnleyOfficial so true - out of order that the players and coaching staff dropped everything to ensure this got made
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
@The_Fence_Mag its buried under the stockport pyramid
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
shoutout to all the supporters, home and away, who made the journey to burnley today - those who actually travelled have understood the situation and looked out for eachother, shame the same cant be said for those sat at home
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
7 months
@thistimeisaac lol arent you that loser who had to delete a tweet making light of the situation in palestine, have you considered giving it a rest? freak.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 month
its also nice as a payday treat
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 month
love the idea of someone buying themselves a snoopy watch as a fun little retirement present i have to say
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
8 months
@grieveroadyt its a character from suzanne collins book gregor the overlander. spot the identifying scar over the eye.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
10 months
@okimstillhungry this radiohead ep
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 year
@H3reWeG0Aga1n @Agoodname467 @megamarvatron ill take from it that you hate women 👍
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
4 months
was abt to make a joke abt the fact that nacho is called nacho. quickly remembered my name is crisp. staying quiet on this one
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
6 months
@ProtonInspector its already the coolest thing in that room i say put him in charge
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
8 months
@ProtonInspector the girls parents were either teachers at another school or heavily involved in the pta or something along those lines (i dont remember exactly). defo some corruption going on
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
4 years
while obviously posting blm content isnt necessarily performative its certainly interesting to see people ik voted tory joining in. ultimately actions speak louder than words and a vote for boris was a vote for a racist.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 month
i got eyes like a hawk, tuah them even
@saltydkdan
Saltydkdan
1 month
“I got eyes like a hawk, two of them even.” -Fuckass things my dad used to say when I was a kid
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 months
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
4 years
@isiahbhh @JSNNn20 @BurnleyOfficial literally the last time burnley played utd what else was he meant to bring up lmao
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
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@chrisatecheese
brave.murder.cheese
2 years
It’s efficient.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 months
@juasanalghaib if your insurance choice is higher than AAA you clearly think too highly of yourself IMO
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 year
i actually think its perfectly reasonable for northerners to be upset about chronic underfunding in our transport infrastructure, but hey what do i know? i am only a northerner after all
@bencsmoke
Ben Smoke
1 year
watch the north collectively lose their minds over us getting some new carriages
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 months
did you know you can go into a pub and buy a pint and sit and read? what a world
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 year
before opening the picadilly line had 0 passenger journeys a year, and therefore no money should have been spent on it. i am very smart
@bencsmoke
Ben Smoke
1 year
before any of you start, manchester tramlink had 44 million passenger journeys in 2019/20 (last available data thats not locky d'd), picadilly line alone sees around 200 million a year.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 months
@beckytaylorgill i reckon being the cox in a rowing team, how hard can shouting and steering actually be
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 year
i went to school and i got a degree
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 months
free madri outside the football museum? mens mental health is so back
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 year
@HITCSevens @HullCity the official hull city account has added its own verification badge to its profile pic?? undeniably good bit
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 months
imagine how good it would be to be on your phone here
@georgie61329
emily chickinson
3 months
Went outside 👍
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
30 days
when i had just started rolling a girl at a nightclub started flirting with me and could tell i was struggling. she offered to roll for me and proceeded to roll the worst cigarette i’ve ever seen and then ran away
@mealgrrl
im meal
1 month
started rolling my own cigs to save money but i’m so bad at it. someone asked to bum a smoke and i lied that i didnt have any cause they look like this
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
5 years
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 months
rocking up in the fit from the “dress as something beginning with L” social from uni
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@elearor
eleanor
2 months
i hope all the oasis fans enjoy swapping friendship bracelets and dressing as their favourite era of gallagher brother x
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
7 days
the woke mob want to take this away from you btw
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
7 days
who remembers candy cigarettes
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
@HITCSevens burnley finishing tenth then signing only dale stephens and will norris
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
@Never_Again2020 @l_d1995x was your post on a private platform that we have been unwittingly granted access too?? 🤡
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
6 months
opened my laptop and this tiny spider was chilling in there. think he was trying to get on the web.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
🚨 new burnley shirt alert! 🚨
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
29 days
jumper season is back!!!
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
9 months
branching out from my standard old football shirt and jeans fit and experimenting with an old cricket top
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
9 months
they were held over
@DiscussingFilm
DiscussingFilm
9 months
A group of 40 people got locked in a theatre during a screening of ‘THE HOLDOVERS’ after employees forgot they were in there. “At that moment, we just wanted freedom. We didn't know how to proceed. It was like we were orphans there.” (Source: )
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
as if shes avoiding being shut down. she took a bullet to her head for her views i do not think she is scared of the consequences of standing up for what is right
@g0ldf1nch
Gold Finch
2 years
@WomenReadWomen I’m sorry she believes this. She’s a remarkable and brave young woman and it’s a shame she has to defer to this new orthodoxy to avoid being shut down.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
16 days
hairs not long enough for a fully fledged mullet so we've got this baby mullet situation instead
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
17 days
terrible influences the lot of you
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
majority of burnley fans were vocally against this and captain ben mee took it upon himself after the match to thoroughly denounce this message
@logoffbrent
Brent
2 years
Good riddance Burnley
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 month
love the idea of someone buying themselves a snoopy watch as a fun little retirement present i have to say
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 months
feeling contrarian today, heres some 2024 albums that are better than romance
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 months
the new fontaines album is good but i think some of you need to calm down a little lol
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
just been to morrisons and thought the self service machine wasnt working, turns out it was but theyve turned the beeps off for the queen. absolute joke
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 month
hope they play stickin to the floor, electricity, nettles, and sketchead, you know, the bee sides
@WWaltuhh
12,000 angry bees
1 month
Angry bees 17, 280, 89 and 1,760 have started a band!!!!
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
@Devon_OnEarth when they drop that they’re project managing their own build you know is going to be a ride
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
4 years
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
@Jblack871 @Ken_Stonger @BBCPolitics @bbcnickrobinson If the queen hadn't died and this happened I'd be with you here. Yet I'm thinking you've forgotten the context of how close the funeral was to you waking up. Of course you'd sing the anthem out of respect.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
cheers for the 𝗞𝗜𝗧 𝗖𝗟𝗘𝗔𝗥𝗔𝗡𝗖𝗘! 🛍️ @BurnleyOfficial now i've bought a shirt how about that kompany announcement eh?
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
6 months
first selfie on my phone vs now
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@ThatChris1209
Chris Deeley
6 months
First selfie on my phone vs now
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
its the only time ive ever heard opposition fans talk about our injuries and its the first time in ages we're actually doing alright on that front. bizarre #twitterclarets
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
guess the ground
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
@milesSI @JoeStephenson96 actually i think its totally fine for people to judge other countries' laws. ones against homosexuality for example, or those that allow adults to have relationships eith minors.
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
22 days
because im not working rest of the week today is actually a friday so as a result i am at the pub
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
@tomclaret couldnt disagree more - absolutely idiotic moment but hes been fantastic for us this season, hold onto him and he could huge for us in the future
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
a person who co-owns a football club, alongside the Saudi PIF, thinks that people should be allowed to own football clubs regardless of their relationship to human rights abusing, warmongering world leaders. who could have seen this coming?
@TheAthleticFC
The Athletic | Football
3 years
Newcastle United co-owner Amanda Staveley has said that it is not “particularly fair” that Roman Abramovich may have to sell #CFC .
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
11 days
yippee!!!
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
14 days
getting a new jacket sunday btw
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 month
reminder not to ever cut your hair what was i thinking getting rid of this
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@yassifiedsloth
yassified sloth from ice age
2 months
Use this tweet as an excuse to post an old pic where you looked hot
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
8 months
(after losing the christmas day truce football match) Can you tweet something like Unbelievable support yesterday and great effort by the lads! Hard result to take! But we go again!
@CaitCamelia
Cait🧃
8 months
my 16 year old sister just sent this to me, the American education system is in shambles
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
24 days
if you ever catch me saying this just know im at rock bottom
@LeahFortx
Leah
25 days
Being single btw is fucking great
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 months
the new fontaines album is good but i think some of you need to calm down a little lol
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
7 months
hate it when theres an actual fully fledged queue for a bar. you know its wrong and should just go stand at the front to get served but equally you’re breaking the social conventions of queues by doing so. impossible scenario
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
got an u18s ticket going for today if anyones after that #twitterclarets
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
these lot are proper weird
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@ftblalfie225
Alfie|Doug King’s SBA
2 years
@gudme123 They’ll be decent but every team to ever play Huddersfield( other than forest) hammer them
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 month
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@beyoncegarden
𝗱𝗮𝗻𝗻𝘆🫧💚
1 month
use this as an excuse to post how you looked in 2020 vs 2024😭
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
who wants to see the cat with no tail that has started living at our uni house
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
2 years
they make the pink cricket balls out of these guys hate to break it to you
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
1 year
watched oppenheimer to take my mind off the disappointment in the cricket theres a bit in the film where they needed it to stop raining and it did
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
4 years
@AdamHamiltonMan @PaulEmbery 5 seconds of kneeling before a 90 minute game is hardly having something shoved down your throat
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
7 months
just seen this photo from yard act at on friday and its so funny why im looking directly at the camera while everyone else is facing the stage 😭😭😭
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@tomjc09
tom crisp
3 years
@_efcluke @kglasss had to check myself lmao its unbelievable
@MarvinJRees
Marvin Rees
3 years
Great to have @AngelaRayner with us in #Bristol yesterday 🏗️ New affordable homes going up by Castle Park 💚 Our green heat pump by the River Avon 👋 Talking to traders in St Nicks with Cllr @KyeDudd 🗳️🗳️🗳️🗳️ There are four elections tomorrow -- use all your votes for Labour
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