❀ kayla ❀
@tenmillionducks
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I am all things Philly until you ask me about football
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picking a college major based on a slight interest you kinda have is the equivalent of a kid telling extreme makeover home edition he kinda likes elephants or sum shit and getting his bedroom turned into a wildlife sanctuary
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catholic school really had CHILDREN passing out in church about once a month and we just accepted that as normal
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walking 25 blocks in wildwood: no problem! a cake walk! easy peasy!
walking 5 blocks at home: no. that’s just too much. i’d rather uber
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why stop at the jonas brothers? let’s get the naked brothers band back together too
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im blaming 12 years of catholic school on the reason why i can’t retain new information. i did NOT need to know that much about the catholic faith.
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no offense but WHY is the capital of pennsylvania HARRISBURG there’s just no point
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@Salido22
@MiMiMiyagii
@OW_SHz
@Peachy_Maia
@3piececrispy
I’m a meteorologist and I didn’t learn about asperitas until college! they’re not even on my ~fairly dated NOAA cloud chart because they’re a relatively new classification
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imagine the media snitching on you to the entire country every time you go out
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i am loving all the quote tweets of the times y’all have passed out LMAOOO if you passed out at your first communion or alter serving or at a funeral just know you’re not alone. i’m finding that there are a lot.
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attendance in college should be the students’ decision only. it shouldn’t be part of the course grade. if they can’t handle missing the classes, the lack of attendance will reflect in their work and lower their grade anyway. and if they can handle it, why bother them?
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honors kids really be taking notes for everything the prof could say “don’t forget to put your name at the top of your essay” and they’ll write in their planners 𝒹𝑜𝓃’𝓉 𝒻𝑜𝓇𝑔𝑒𝓉 𝓃𝒶𝓂𝑒
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the year is 2008. it’s 1am. you’re the only one awake at the sleepover. you lay on the couch in your bobby jack pajamas watching malcolm in the middle at a low volume. suddenly, the TV blares: “HI, BILLY MAYS HERE WITH THE BIG CITY SLIDER STATION”
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@diaryofacait
@LISAKICKME
@shanzwarma
@GomezSassss
it’s pricey but I’m a G cup and I never thought my boobs could look like this without any straps (also backless!!) best of luck out there ladies🫡
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so proud of myself for achieving my goals❤️
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old macdonald taking a scantron test
A B E I O
1. [▫️] [▫️] [◾️] [▫️] [▫️]
2. [▫️] [▫️] [▫️] [◾️] [▫️]
3. [▫️] [▫️] [◾️] [▫️] [▫️]
4. [▫️] [▫️] [▫️] [◾️] [▫️]
5. [▫️] [▫️] [▫️] [▫️] [◾️]
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i put kanye west in a picture frame in my living room and I'm gonna count how many days it takes for my mom to notice
http://t.co/9gheG95JFs
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yo we were completely sober at holy family dances doing THAT
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and in case y’all don’t know this is the ~go birds~ kid 😚
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philadelphias dedication to drinking is honestly remarkable
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if you don’t put water on your toothbrush before and after the toothpaste you’re a psychopath
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ny grandmom got me an initialed beach bag but my middle name is marie so
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I’m half asleep and thought this was brendon urie
her: u must be tyga dressed as a vampire if u think we fuckin
me:
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northeast philly did me a great disservice by not teaching me how to properly dress myself for the public
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me approximately 5 times a day: i really need to see a doctor about this
* me at the doctors*
doc: any issues?
me: nope! feeling great! healthiest ever tbh! don’t worry bout lil old me
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wondering why i, a philly girl with a noticeable philly accent, decided to take a class this semester focused entirely on water. i am afraid to speak
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@magicgoeshere
@JacobKaplan17
starbucks- free drink
dennys- free “value slam” meal
panera- free pastry
firehouse subs- free medium sub w any purchase
chick fil a- free brownie
mcdonalds- free pastry
note: I think for most of these you have to sign up w them at least a few weeks before your bday
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thinking about all the restrictions on mask designs catholic schools will impose 🤢🤢
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i was called a whore in the courtroom. the judge said since i did it once before, i must have liked it being done again. he said we’re “just kids” and that my case didn’t matter. we were 15.
#metoo
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archbishop ryan been doing this yall r late
High school banning backpacks in effort to make school safer.
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people who didn’t watch spongebob growing up are not as funny as people who did and that’s a fact
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high school: you CANNOT add me on ANY social media, it is FORBIDDEN. we must NOT know details of personal life
college prof: best way to contact me is through facebook or send me a text. i’ll pick you up for class, just send me your address
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everyone says they miss vine but there was a good few months where fuckboys were humping the ground to “grind with me” i ain’t forget
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self confidence flex: i used to get ridiculed for having big lips. i was so insecure about them, i’d try to make them look smaller in pics all the time. i even asked my mom for a lip reduction once. god i looked so DUMB. now everyone wants lip fillers and i’m out here like 👄
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@nick_berent
of all my tweets, of course the one to go big was related to my mildly traumatic catholic upbringing
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i still don’t know where fridge water comes from and at this point i’m too afraid to ask
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i do not understand the physical properties of a wawa pretzel?? i’ve never come across another pretzel like THAT
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hear me out. what if the state was pencilvania and the writing utensil was pennsyl
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nevada, arizona, pennsylvania, and georgia waiting to see who’s gonna finish counting their votes first
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not me going viral on tiktok for being a hot meteorologist
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why is “warm” pronounced like “worm” but “worm” is pronounced like “werm”
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me last night: has mental breakdown about my shitty grades and academic performance overall
me this morning: skips class
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y’all wanna venmo a sis & help me through meteorology? kaysmith925 👀🗣🤟🏼
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on my 11th birthday i tried to record a flipnote on my DSi of me singing taylor swift but my cat got one of my birthday gift bags stuck on his head and came BARRELING through the room completely blinded by the bag, running into walls and furniture at the speed of light
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when you walk into your 3rd party of the night and you’re beyond trashed
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girls who peaked in high school love using the “you’re irrelevant” argument
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god adding coronavirus to the simulation
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the band perry: *drops if i die young*
police officers that give drug assemblies to middle schoolers:
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divorce party changing ur major
🤝
not something u ever plan on but it’s lit when it happens
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#RIPMuhammadAli
this is the second time I've done a project on someone and they died shortly after so I'm bouta do a project on trump
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today in wellness class we brought up melanoma and someone whispered “isn’t that trump’s wife”
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in catholic grade school we couldn’t get 100s on our report cards for this exact reason ❤️
my history teacher doesnt give out 100s because "only god is perfect"
what the actual fuck
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me 20 times in jason derulo
a conversation
🤝
whatcha say?
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someone really took the time to carve 4 men’s faces into the side of a mountain
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*jesus picks up bread* this... is my body
*jesus picks up wine* this... is my blood
*jesus picks up the beat* this... right here... is my... pretty boy swag👈🏻😎👉🏻
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there was nothing better than a 6th grade mall trip with ur bffs. trying on dresses u would never buy, getting pics in a photo booth, hittin the food court, mayb catchin a movie... hours of fun
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might go to the holy family dance this friday night just to feel somethin
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today is my cat’s 12th birthday, so to honor her, please enjoy this compilation of her making noises when I touch her
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how did the color indigo find itself to be so important that it’s listed in the classic ROY G BIV color spectrum, yet it couldn’t make its way into my 24 pack of colored pencils
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if your religious, conservative family members don’t respect your pronouns, start referring to god as “she”
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wait i thought destruction of property wasn’t a proper response to being angry about something............. interesting!
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that awkward second “thank you” when you hold the door for someone but there are two sets of doors
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reminder that just because you pay a shit ton of money to go to a prestigious private university doesn’t mean you’re better than someone going to community college
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every older person i’ve told that my new job is minimum wage has guessed that PA minimum wage is around $11-14. when i tell them it’s $7.25 they’re APPALLED.
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every day my mom sends a new picture of my dog sitting in this chair in our backyard
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being white is exhausting sometimes. like i gotta pour my heart into sweet caroline? again?
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one of the drawers in my kitchen wouldn’t close so my roommate went behind the drawer to see what was up. not only did she find our missing oven mitt, a fireball koozie, and a measuring teaspoon that was not ours, but there was also this coupon that expired 28 years ago
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pennsylvania is flat out not testing people who most likely have COVID-19 because we don’t have enough tests. there are definitely WAY more cases than are being reported, because the cases can’t be confirmed. it’s bigger than we think.
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seeing people realizing it’s
not social posted from
distancing on their memories
snapchat
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IM SORRY DID THE NEWS JUST SAY ONE DIRECTION ARE GONNA LOOK FOR A REPLACEMENT BECAUSE I WILL THROW UP EVERYWHERE IF THEY TRY TO REPLACE ZAYN
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in eighth grade our school won $5,000 to upgrade our science lab because... we made..... a harlem shake video
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my mom would tell me to be grateful for the food on my plate bc there are people that have to dig through trash for their next meal. so when my mom wasn’t looking i’d throw out whole meals thinking i was helping the poor
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@SteckYourself
it was usually hot in the church, plus in catholic school we went to mass early in the morning, plus there’s often the smell of incense lingering which can make some people sick! a teacher would just take the kid outside & mass would continue like nothing happened
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white ppl love saying “speak of the devil!” when someone they were talking about walks in
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in case anyone was wondering what having sr alice is like
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