Hazel, who really is quite tall | London
@tallhazel
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not that you can tell, but I have really great eyes | @klecollective
London
Joined July 2019
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Pegged a person for the first time today, and you can consider this tweet as my call out for *more, more, more pegging bookings*.
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Consider this my formal announcement: I cut my hair. To see it in person, you know what to do.
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Psst. All for research purposes, I've decided to return to offering regular incall days in various London locations.
- the West End
- near Regent's Park
- London Bridge
For more information on the dates I'll be visiting:
📸
@atglamourlondon
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You know what they say: when one door closes, another hot blonde opens her legs
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Some *thrilling* news:
Pass me the highlighters and colour-coded stationery, I'm going back to full time education.
From January 2022, I'll be starting a two year long Masters course that has been my focus on obtaining for the past year. I am squealing with glee.
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Was I more carefree when I was fringe-free? An analysis.
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An afternoon I will remember fondly for a long time, after almost two years of waiting to meet him - the kindest soul.
And, my god, the orgasms.
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God bless the bisexuals and our ineptitude at sitting in chairs
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Mirror mirror on the wall, bet you wish you could snog us all
@MeetVivianGrace
@seekingeve
@MOliviaSinclair
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I’m just a girl, looking at a country house, and asking it to belong to her
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Please see attached my evidence for why London should have summer weather more often.
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While I’ve been relishing my hibernation, I think it’s time for me to rejoin (twitter) society, don’t you think?
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Oh daddy dear, you know you're still number one
But girls they wanna have fern
Oh girls just wanna have
That's all they really want
Some fern
📸 by
@ScarlettMayKink
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According to news reports, the warm weather has perpetuated a short supply of modest clothing in the Hazel residence
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Last night I had my first ever couple booking and, frankly, it will go down as one of the hottest experiences of my life 🥵🔥
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On a mission to dominate all circular mirrors
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alexa play Eartha Kitt, Want to be Evil
💫 A thoroughly delicious meeting today. For those who would like details on my incall dates & rates, email: hazel @ tallesc*rtlondon dot com 💫
* replace with o
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Say ‘threesome’s a charm’ three times in the mirror and I’ll appear to haunt your bed.
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PSA: From now on, I'll be swapping out my bras for rope harnesses.
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Admittedly I’ve been having far too much fun since I’ve turned 26.
But I’d like to have more. Won’t you join me?
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Get me back to evenings of marble baths,
@MsLouisaKnight
and lovely gentlemen immediately please
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My historic tweets have been wiped in order to *comply* as best I can with the new TOS.
If you want to catch me, you can do so over at
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A coffee-table book
(noun)
a large, expensive, lavishly illustrated book, intended especially for pre-coital reading.
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Longing for the return of sunshine, spas and lazy Sundays with no to-do lists
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Everyone talks about ass/feet worship, but no one ever talks about décolletage worship 😤
Kiss. My. Neck.
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A step by step guide to a thriving workplace environment:
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My favourite position?
‘Riding bough girl’
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Let’s play a game.
What famous painting do you think this photographic masterpiece by
@StudioMedusa1
resembles the most?
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It’s been eighty four years… and I can still smell the last tweet (I posted on this account).
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Last night at an outdoor music event, I kept shuffling to keep space between myself and a group of dancing men. A very hot woman nearby leaned in close to ask if I’m gay. I keenly shouted back ‘I’m bisexual! How could you tell?!’
Turns out she was asking if I was okay.
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You can all take up your rage with twitter and their TOS at the travesty of not witnessing my unbridled hotness in this Bordelle harness
Thank you to the new dalliance who generously gifted it, you have a well-trained eye🔥
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Blown away yet again by the collective hotness of my colleagues at the
@KLECollective
shoot yesterday. Here’s my small contribution:
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Would you rather:
a) I caught you watching me
b) Announce yourself and find out I knew all along
📸
@ScarlettMayKink
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As I am currently stuck under a sleeping cat, who is using my left arm as a mattress, I thought I’d write a thread I’ve been meaning to for a while:
on the infallible hotness of vocalising in the *bedroom*.
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The only tiered approach with any longevity in this country.
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Lie back, relax, and gorge yourself on the blogpost I wrote about the roleplay
@ScarlettMayKink
and I created recently.
Read on -
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Well this picture was not how I expected my double jointed fingers to expose themselves when in the presence of
@ScarlettMayKink
, but life is full of surprises. Right?
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I’m not sobbing over the fact humpback whales can have friendships that last forty plus years - meeting in the same place each year to hunt fish together - you are
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There’s very little that I love more than a good soaking.
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The Al Fresco Challenge: to watch a sunset from as many of London's best rooftop restaurants and bars as we can before indoor dining is possible again.
AND you'll be able to ogle my jawline the entire time, lucky you.
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New blog on the block: thoughts on self-care, and how I practice it.
Newsletter subscribers saw it first, sign up to have my words delivered straight into your inbox <3
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A spectacular date involving delicious board room roleplay, English sparkling wine and a reciprocal view that certainly gave some Southbank pedestrians something to remember.
More, more, more please 💦
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