Sam Pink 👎
@sampinkisalive
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Premier Entertainer Sam///pink////is////alive///g////mail
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Should I get my brother a 3000 dollar olive garden gift card for Xmas.
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Somebody in email: 'oh wow I can't believe you wrote back!'
Me (shirtless and wearing a potato sack for underwear while grilling a hotdog over a lightbulb): 'no problem, thanks for reading my stuff.'
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Posted essay on Fuccboi. Doing podcast on it too. Would be willing to do one or two more podcasts if people are interested. And then I'll drop it and let Sean enjoy his
money.
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If you've made a creative thing because your heart told you to, and you listened, and you made it, and no one else ever could've made it, you are a success. A huge success.
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I have some good writing advice, and it's the only advice I'll give on the topic. Buy a special hat. Cowboy hat/tiara/sombrero, etc. When it's time to write, put the hat on. Boom, youre a writer, in writing mode. When you're done, take it off, writing time is over. Now get at it.
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Scared the virus might remind us the majority of our daily occupations are bad distractions at best and evil scams at worst and that the only checks written on the way to the eternal bank, is time spent with loved ones spraying love like so much champagne, taking care of things.
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Nephew took me on tour of my brother's basement to show me every spot where he's seen a spider, including some lengthy and, I believe, totally fabricated explanations.
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I'm gonna be on The Daily Show. Which of these author photos should I use.
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Been writing for ten years now. Thankful for all the cool people I've met and the help I've received. Looking forward to doing more
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Final covers for 'the ice cream man & other stories.'
The cover will also contain, I am told, a 'gloss spot.' now just what exactly is a gloss spot, you say. And to that, I say, shut the fuck up.
art by Ben styer. 3/3/2020. Soft Skull Press.
'the night ahead & no real fate.'
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feeling more and more glad to have foregone building any kind of wealth or assets, when all of that will become readily available to me and my roving gang of outlaws after society collapses
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recommend, if youve done drugs consistently/daily for more than half of yr life--in an attempt to escape the pain & overwhelming emotion of life--to stop, be brave, eat the pain & emotion like so many tic tacs, & graduate towards feeling other peoples' pain & emotion, in service.
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Going to write and self publish a small run of a book 'on writing' but nothing technical, only social/psychological/pragmatic.
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The only writing award there is, is when someone urges their friend to read your book after reading it.
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Soft Skull will be publishing KETCHUP in Fall '22.
Very happy to share that the inimitable
@sampinkisalive
once again joins forces with team
@softskull
! KETCHUP reads like a love letter to small towns, diners, wayward animals, and people who feel out of place, relying on the care of a narrator who offers a sympathetic ear 🦆
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You follow celebrity dating like the stock market, treat a wedding like the super bowl, venerate actors to the level of thinkers/philosophers, treat an election like a circus, and wonder why shit sucks
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The ice cream man and other stories (soft skull, march 2020).
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The book I'm working, KETCHUP, will be the last one. If anyone's interested in putting it out/good deal, let me know or I will put it out myself. I also own rights to the older books. Will keep everything in print one way or the other. Mission complete. Xoxo.
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Thinking about how much pain comes from not being able to accept or give love, which everyone needs. And how the crafting of defensive egos is viewed as an accomplishment rather than the cause of pain. Too scared of embarrassment to surrender and be seen. Others acting the same.
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looking for funding/help for a nonfiction book where i follow the 'juggalos' around on tour, from a perspective other than 'hehe stupid white trash.' if you can help, let me know. and thanks.
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considering posting screenshots of this argument i'm having with someone on instagram trying to shame me for publishing with a press named 'lazy fascist'...'in this political climate.' folks, please, i'm beggin you, don't be a fucking cop.
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Always tempted to end an otherwise normal/regular book with 20-40 pages of the main character dramatically fighting off hundreds of people by hand
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wildly successful encounter with softspoken/mumbly gas station cashier who said a tattoo of mine reminded him of a 'crash bandicoot' character then concluded by staring out the window and whispering 'everybody liked crash'
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The first night of any house/dogsitting I observe a ritual called 'night of the locust' where I deliberately eat all the food in your house, like even shit I wouldn't normally eat like crackers/marshmallows, everything except spices.
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This is the year I become a romance writer, and focus on writing a very long romance novel.
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Nonfiction book where I spend a year living with/profiling various grandmothers
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Happy New Year. Thankful for my friends, my physical and mental shape, being able to live off of drawing pictures/writing, and for being able to be thankful at all. Thanks for the support and good luck on your mission as well.
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'midwestern politeness' is just powdered sugar on a brick.
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writers: oh my god my life is a mess i can barely take care of myself!
also writers: but here's the key to effective politics for millions
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Released KETCHUP (a fairy tale) today. I'll be selling copies myself when I get them in, otherwise you can order thru link. Went thru kdp to help with mailing & international orders, but you can always buy thru me. Thanks/enjoy. (Design by
@amerikanakia
)
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i like some people who make shit i dont like. i dislike some people who make shit i like. i like some people who dislike things i like. i dislike some people who like the things i like.
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I dont like that type of tweet/sentiment that's like 'how to write: drink coffee and stare at wall, get back in bed, fml' or whatever. That doesnt help anyone. If you don't wanna write then don't. Nobody is asking you & ur just alienating/misguiding others. Do it, or dont do it.
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If you want the opposite of Twitter, get into an obscure/mechanical hobby and read forums. It's very comforting and rewarding.
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Momentarily confused about whether the 'F' grading for 'crime' in the neighborhood I'm trying to move into meant people are good at crime there, or needed to improve how good at crime they are
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Thinking about checking out an issue of The New Yorker. Do I have to read the previous ones or will I understand it if I just 'jump right in.'
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The Event, an epic joke, is available today. Thanks to
@eyerarat
for design/layout. And
@BeebyDeeby
and
@manwellperkins
for proofreads. Enjoy.
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Discovered I often don't get along with people with large friend groups not because I'm antisocial but because it usually indicates a person who has many options for blind support of/distraction from their shitty behavior, allowing them to never develop or face anything.
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New poetry chapbook. Up for sale. Here's the table of contents.
Thanks.
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Ummmm, wow, ok, so....I'll be teaching at NYU this spring?
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a 'life coach' who follows you around and says nothing, only hits you with a stick once in a while.
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I will help other writers/artists in any way I can. I don't have many answers or much power, outside of my own experience, but I'll help if you think I can. (Laces fingers underneath chin and blinks rapidly) I'm not a gatekeeper. I'm a door holder. Hehe
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Couple excerpts from KETCHUP coming out next month. Here's a cover I mocked up for do one day. Considering putting it out myself but not sure. Either way, the pilot light is always on.
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the final stage in mental health is realizing there was never anything wrong with you, you are healthy and beautiful, and the problem was just an aggregate of outside pressures, some necessary, others unpleasant, but most downright malevolent, and the pain was in trying/worrying.
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A healthy-feeling thing to do is to be serious when you're serious and joke when you're joking, and not some constant mix of the two, leading you to wonder if you have any real convictions, or any real joy.
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Heres the poem Other Cops somebody mentioned recently. Enjoy.
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Probably one of the only times I've felt like a genius was when I texted 'fuck you, dumbass' from my mom's phone to my younger brothers phone.
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I'll never forget being at a temp office applying for a job and seeing some guy's resume for a janitor position and under experience he wrote 'janitor' and under duties he wrote 'what a janitor do'
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Today is the day someone posts something here that is going to solve every problem for everybody, I can feel it.
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Proof of good credit? Proof of income? Ma'am please, I've twice been a pushcart nominee.
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happy to announce the forthcoming publication of 'The Book of Ornaments: Collected Drawings.' hardcover 8X11, 150 pages of drawings & handwritten.... somethings. selling package deals/preorders here. out nov. 30th.
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Three poems from a book of short poems I'm working on, called '100 poems to cure whatever's wrong with you or create the problems you need' (things to hum on the way to the pile) if anyone's interested in publishing it, preferably for $$$ then message me. I got goo.
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Community is a word people use to get you to do something. It is never spoken as a responsibility of one's own. It's like when you hear xylophones or ukelele in a commercial.
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I don't know who needs to hear this, but if you're bartending a wedding, & you complain about making a Shirley temple (let alone hide the cherries and say you're out), you will NEVER be part of my crew. You are everything wrong with the world. I spit on yr fucking grave.
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Painting for sale. 'the process of haunting your sunlight completely.' acrylic on acrylic paper. Message if interested.
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At the wedding I worked tonight this kid would order a sierra mist and as I poured it he'd express excitement by slapping his hands together and rubbing them vigorously, then clamp them beneath his armpits.
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Predicting you're gonna see more of the grew up connected/rich/expensive schools/major publisher authors doing the 'writing should be controversial yall' thing in interviews as the attention fades and the mechanism of the publishing industry continues to fail.
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Me, in six months, to an attractive stranger: 'man, it's crazy, before all this shit I had a house, good credit, like ten jetskis, a pony, multiple vehicles, and now, fuck.'
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Whatever you're into, you gotta broadcast it hard, and then other people will think that's who you are, and then you'll think that's who you are too.
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briefly imagined a show called 'america's next top elder' where people over 70 compete in 'telling tales' 'home remedies' and 'settling disputes among the youth' for the position of america's next top elder.
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People love this one. God bless.
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The way I interpret the myth of Sisyphus is that it's just fun to watch the boulder roll back down, because what else is there.
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If you're too dumb to realize that you don't need towels, that the clothes you are about to put on will absorb water, then I don't know.
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in spring of 2018,
@softskull
will release 'the garbage times' and 'white ibis' in one book. (swirling liquor in glass) let the games begin
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People are talking about their advances so here are mine:
Person- nothing
No hellos- nothing
Rontel- nothing
Witch piss- nothing
Garbage times/white Ibis 13k (this was originally including reprints of person/witch piss too)
Ice cream man 8k
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For a real spook this Halloween season, try being generous to a complete stranger, or asking someone questions about themselves without using those questions as a gateway to answer them yourself, and/or lastly, being open at all times to be hurt
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Found some drafts then started writing in the drafts section.
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The brotherhood of eating lunch in idling cargo van and looking across parking lot at someone else eating lunch in idling cargo van.
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Sometimes I look at shit, like on here or somewhere else, and lm just like, what is this shit. What the fuck is this shit. I really have no idea.
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I hope everyone is having a nice early evening, and whipping up some killer writing, or just chuckling with their loved ones. 😜
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The things u make are bread crumbs leading to your heart. Some will follow them & simply look inside & say 'neat' & leave. Some will knock & ask to be let inside. And some will find they've been lead to their own heart, to knock on a door already open. Either way. Success.
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If you write reviews after reading a book, that would be great. Even if it's a screenshot. It helps a lot. It doesn't have to be a formal review either. Also if you know how to get a book on Goodreads let me know.
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i'm going to laugh so hard when the first robot commits suicide from replacing a human at a job.
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one of the most beautiful moments of my life happened when i opened a bag of chips in the car right after grocery shopping and the guy parked next to me looked and nodded his head.
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Celebrating pub day--after a day of flipping burgers and navigating my drunk boss--by having some ice cream in the cab of my truck, staring forward as it idles.
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the thing is the thing. i make the thing & then i dont matter. i dont speak for it. it speaks for itself. after it's made, i dont matter. i'm no more/no less than having made the thing, which doesn't need me anymore; it belongs to anyone else. but i'm not it; it's more important.
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Email from guy: hey man, enjoyed that book, keep up the good work
Email from girl: hey I enjoyed that book, keep up the good work and also I'm going to kill you/will you kill me.
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