sahej m
@sahejjm
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She/Her | mid-life crisis expert By-lines: @ArreTweets @Food52 Writer of: Rhythm in Blues, Amidships
Brussels, Belgium
Joined October 2018
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Your 20s are all about loss. You lose your friends, you learn to lose the idea of what you thought your life would be. You shed the skin of youthful careless. You lose hope, money, even your mind.
But it’ll get better. It’s a rite of passage.
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half of twitter types like they're writing an academic paper the other half writes like they're on drugs
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why brown parents gotta call relationships "affairs" 😡
sounds so scandalous
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I think we're all a little heartbroken by how this universe has treated our mothers
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Some of us will only live our 20s in our 30s and that's okay
I guess
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Not me sending "you up?" texts to my friends in different time zones like a regular fuck boy
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“Like a compass needle that points north, a man's accusing finger always finds a woman. Always.” - Khaled Hosseini
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This Cred guy is single-handedly responsible for turning Twitter into LinkedIn
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it's like someone asked grade school nick to write an essay about his wife
My wife is Indian. She is Hindu, and she is incredible in every way. She has taught me so much about her culture and religion. I love and admire her so much, and as you can see we have fun together. Happy Karva Chauth to everyone!
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my biggest flex for the day has been my ability to seamlessly read
@diljitdosanjh
's tweets
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Thinking about this man on the flight who told me he loved my hairstyle because it made me look like Rambo
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how many of your relationships would sustain if you stopped being a giver?
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bumped into a classmate who was weeping in the college washroom today. I stayed with her and talked to her till she was okay. just got a call from a Swiggy guy asking the directions to my house. she's surprised me with cheesecake :)
lowkey weeping 😭😭
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if john krasinski can look bangin' with that pakoda nose, so can u. don't lose hope.
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I know your 20s are SUPPOSED to suck but this is far beyond anything I could have imagined
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My partner often indulges my silly questions by saying "ask what you like, there's no such a thing as a stupid question" - so now I'm on a hunt for the stupidest question in existence. One day I. Will. Break. Him.
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the sheer number of men that have responded to this saying "only some men" 😂 I have only one word for you: b u t t h u r t
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When I was a kid, I wanted to grow up to be Miley Cyrus.
As an adult, I DEFINITELY want to grow up to be Miley Cyrus.
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no one who owns a mac ever says "let me get my laptop out" it's always HERE I'LL SHOW IT TO YOU ON MY MAC
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how do you mourn the loss of a friendship that died in front of your eyes?
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my mum who has absolutely NOTHING to do with my room will walk in, open the window, and walk out
????????
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@ whoever needs to hear this: you don't need a boyfriend/girlfriend, you need therapy
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don't fucking romanticize the rains if you don't have to travel in public transport 😡
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As a woman I'm genuinely afraid of being polite towards men because they ALWAYS get the wrong idea
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I have these 2 friends who have been dating for a while now but the guy is in army training camp while the girl is back in my city. he gets 10 minutes A WEEK to make calls, out of which he needs to call his fam and her. and they're making it work! 😭 it just really fills my heart
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Who's one conventionally good-looking person that you don't find attractive?
I'll start. Bradley Cooper.
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reminder: Hasan Minhaj is not a journalist. technically, it's not his duty to inform people about the exact goings on of the world. the fact that he's doing it for some things is good on him. but he's still a comedian. he still has a business to run.
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My partner has forbidden me from buying new books until I finish the ones I have.
So now I just buy it for him and say "I really want you to read this one" and then "borrow" it a few weeks later.
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Indian men don't want done unto their daughters what they do to their wives
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my dad, as an act of resistance, wants to turn ON all the lights in the house.
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McDonald's has become far too expensive for something that's meant to ruin my body
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some mornings I wake up and think "today I'm just going to dress like a lit student" so I put on my kajal and bindi and kurta w ripped jeans and kolhapuris and hope the world knows that I read good books
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Restarted my phone, switched wifi networks, used data only to realise that the problem wasn't mine 😡
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today, my mom complained about being hungry. I smugly told her to have a fruit. she said 'who eats a fruit when they're hungry?' to which I said 'if you're truly hungry, you would eat anything you get.'
life has truly come full circle.
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I fail to believe any other cuss word in any language has the same power and gravitas as chutiye
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Should I comment "pandemic chal raha hai bhau" under every Instagram post celebrating holi today?
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dear good folks of twitter,
after months or hardwork, I have finally launched my own little service.
now accepting orders 🤗❤️
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sorry I unfollowed u it was nothing personal you were just fucking annoying
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body! positivity! includes! penis! sizes!
stop putting men down by commenting on the size of their dicks
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I remember being 15 and telling my dad that I wanted to get married by 23 😭😭😭 what was I on
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living in India basically means watching out for both sides of the road even while crossing a one way street 🤷🏻♀️
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I remember back in 12th, I topped the state in French.
The government offered me a scholarship to study science???
🤔🤔
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I find it incredibly stupid when people say that they don't care. why don't you? I think my biggest strength is that I care and I care deeply. you're barely a person if you don't care.
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men can continue crying to themselves in my mentions but I'm done dealing with their idiocy. muting this BYE
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I think this is also a good time to remind men that the first time most women saw a penis in person was not consensually.
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Last year during the lockdown, I still wanted to do things, make shit happen and not let the world around me weigh me down. This year, I have given up. I just can't.
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DUMBFUCK BOAT EARPHONES IF YOU DON'T SPEND SO MUCH BATTERY TELLING ME I'M RUNNING OUT OF CHARGE, MAYBE I WOULDN'T RUN OUT OF CHARGE
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planning your commute in Mumbai is basically also factoring in the time you would waste by getting rejected by auto wallas
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Wanted to treat mom for how helpful she's been with my business. I gave her my card and told her to go crazy. She got back with a bag full of things for me and nothing for herself. 😭 Why are mothers like this?
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at what age does watching a sex scene in a movie, with your parents stop becoming awkward?
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please avoid ordering food via Z*mato/Sw*ggy today - don't want to imagine what it's like to ride in this downpour
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made a chocolate cake with a plum cream cheese filling and a dark chocolate mousse icing
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if I were a lawyer I would just go around suing anyone who is mean to me
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I just think everyone should see this picture of me and my cat holding hands (and paws)
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It's been close to 6 months of my business. I've worked my ass off doing everything online and offline; while also managing my podcast and writing.
Today, my Xmas orders went out and the love is pouring in. Ngl I'm tearing up and lowkey proud of myself for making this happen :)
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If ur in a position of power at a workplace, please be kind to those who work below you. The world is falling apart & it's extremely difficult to do your best. Some might not come out of this at all; it's your prerogative to do enough to get by by inflicting the least damage.
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seen this movie so many times and just realised that miranda priestly is wearing jhumkas
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making a thread on tips on for the protest on 19th:
1. first and foremost, please tell someone you trust that you'll be going for the protest with complete details. so that SOMEONE knows where you are and who you're with, in case they need to get in touch with you.
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ever see a picture of yourself and just,,, I look like that and people still talk to me?
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under grad kids in my college are so peppy and alive. their soul hasn't been violently sucked out yet
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dear united, please don't lose today. I won't know what to do with my boyfriend.
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why don't Instagram shops put their prices in the caption? genuine question.
as someone whose primary business presence is on IG, I make sure I put prices and other details up because I don't want a potential customer feeling sheepish about asking prices.
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I am my own indie boyfriend bye
okay where’s my indie boyfriend that wears this kind of outfit at
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ban people from using horoscope as a means to justify their shitty behaviour and unresolved issues 2019
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