G. Calvocoressi
@rocketfantastic
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Just a non-binary lesbian in a Greek man’s kaftan. Harvard-Radcliffe Institute Fellow 22-23 . Opinions my own always.
Old East Durham, NC
Joined January 2010
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Woke up in a state with a lesbian governor. My hair feels shorter. My boots seem shinier. The birds are singing Joan Armatrading.
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Harsh writing advice: Poets said terrible things about Mary Oliver's work. She wrote her poems, had a deeply loving partnership, sold out 5,000 seat theaters in less than 30 minutes, and crawled through the forest to see what the foxes saw.
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Today 35 years ago my mom took her life. Tonight I’ll receive the Lucille Clifton Legacy Award at St. Mary’s College. I wish I could tell that 13 yr old kid poems will help save them. Lucille Clifton’s poems specifically. That hope & love & generosity exist. The future exists.
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The days I don’t kill myself are extraordinary. Thanks so much to The New Yorker and Kevin Young and Hannah Aizenman for publishing this poem that’s truer than true for me.
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I feel that my COVID-era bio should be: I am currently unreliable and doing my best and I assume you are too.
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Not one person in the highest levels of administration at
@unc
stood publicly with
@nhannahjones
. That’s not on the BOT & BOG (monstrous as they are). That’s on UNC Chapel Hill.
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Wrote first poem in two years & it got accepted somewhere great. I have such a privileged life in this community & still: I really thought I was so broken I’d never write again. If you are feeling you are so broken you will never write again I want you to know I know you will.
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@chelseabwrites
One time I read in an auditorium that sat about 250 people. It was just me, the host, one audience member, the catering person, and a spread for 250.
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I stood in front of them. Stared. Paced back and forth. Picked them up put them down picked them up put them down. Stood almost catatonic staring. It was my own Bergman film. I didn’t get them. Now I am home and bereft.
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@nktgill
Thank you so much for reading and sharing my poems. I really appreciate you and everyone who is reading and opening the portal. And sending love to all who are missing and missed.
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Kids playing ding dong ditch in the neighborhood. Walked out & found them out back. In a nice way asked them to stop. Then the most homophobic transphobic stream of language imaginable directed at me. Could not have been more than 10 yrs old. This world. It’s a heartbreaker.
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There’s no way to bury the lead on this one. Today during outdoor office hours I looked down. And a possum was sitting on my foot.
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My plan
@unc
today for what it’s worth. Because classes are not cancelled I’ve told students class is totally optional & no assignments are due this week. I’ve said I’ll be in the room if there are people who think the structure of having somewhere to be would be helpful to them
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Thanks to
@su__cho
&
@PoetryFound
for publishing these poems of missing. I’m thinking of it as a communal form. So: write a poem that uses the phrase “Miss you” over & again like breath music. Can you get the poem portal to open btwn you & the missed so you’re together again?
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Thinking of starting my own university. We’re going to focus on lesbianism, social justice, and carbs.
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So excited to be in The New York Times! Thanks to
@VChangPoet
for featuring my poem! What a boost!
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Does anyone else feel so far behind they don’t even know how to begin to catch up?
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Taking a break to say, once again, that not being taught how to write a grant/fellowship application when I was in an MFA program was the most shortsighted and elitist pedagogical omission imaginable and I think about it every time I pay my student loan.
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Memory eternal Randall Kenan. Beloved friend. Beloved colleague. Best next door office neighbor. Best heart. Best angel in the history of angels I am sure.
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33 years today since my mother took her life. I pulled cards as always. 33 gongs sounding now into the yard for every year she’s been gone. May all beings be free from suffering. Stay if you can. You are loved without judgment no matter what.
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Locked down again
@unc
. I am locked down and secure. F these guns forever and ever. God bless these students, this staff, these colleagues. I certainly haven’t had any training in the last two weeks. We are keeping us safe. And we are safe right now.
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By the power vested in me I hereby grant you NO GUILT as it pertains to grading, getting things done, being on time, missing the ___________.
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Cannot even believe I get to spend next year among these amazing scholars, artists, beings as a
@RadInstitute
Fellow! Cambridge here I come! Endlessly grateful. I’ve dreamed of this my whole writing life.
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27 years with Angeline today! So sad to be in different places this year. So lucky to be in the same life together for so deep and long.
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In the first days of my 48th year I realized Moby Dick is a page turner.
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My partner keeps getting the Wordle in 2. Organizing the witch trial now.
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Sir, I was raised by Adrienne Rich and 80's power ballads. Do not come for me.
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What are movies you’d call poetic in terms of the strategies they use or the effect they achieve. I’m doing a class on Poetry & Movies. I’ve got the films set but I’d love to add to the recommended list. If you like I’ll put your name & book beside the rec on the syllabus Thanks!
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Perimenopause in a non-binary masculine presenting/imagined/dreamed of body has been __________. Destabilizing to say the least. Thanks to
@su__cho
&
@PoetryFound
for giving me space to work into it. Thanks for reading these new poems.
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Right now on the bus a woman got on who, it turns out is also a bus driver. She’s delivering biscuits to our driver who’s her boyfriend. He said, “When I met her I stopped looking” & the whole bus cheered. She’s along for the ride. Now half the bus is talking abt shrimp etouffee
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I hate this Op-Ed so much my pancreas hurts. Maybe if writers had money for healthcare, elder/childcare, time to write. Most of us don’t. Money is time. Money is healthcare. Also get rid of the rec letters
@GuggFellows
. And stop rewarding dudes like this.
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If Michael Phelps calls the female swimmers girls one more time
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A thing I never want to do again is walk out of a building, hands on our heads, surrounded by heavily armed police. God & angels & everything bless the students, faculty, & staff at
@UNC
. Bless that faculty member & their family.
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I’d love to try my luck sending poems to some journals I don’t know about yet (which I’m sure is a lot!). Where do you love? Trying to read and send only to places I don’t know/ have never sent to this next year. A good way of attending to my literary myopia!
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I feel a good rule of thumb is: Stevie Nicks can cover whatever she wants, nobody gets to cover Stevie Nicks.
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One of the greatest nights of my life. So honored to win the Publishing Triangle’s Audre Lorde Award for Rocket Fantastic. Just so thankful to everyone. And always always my love and gratitude for my love Angeline.
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The days I don’t kill myself are extraordinary. Thanks so much to The New Yorker,
@Deardarkness
&
@ghazalblues
for publishing this poem!
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Nothing will remind you that you’ve never learned to love yourself like a project statement on a fellowship application.
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This is Elizabeth Bishop and Lota. And now we can all drop dead.
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The meeting is canceled. They wanted me to tell you.
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The number of Black lesbian poets we’ve lost this year is a tragedy and a crisis that needs to be honored, named, and attended to.
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This morning all over the South organizers are waking up and getting out there again. Like they do everyday no matter who wins any given election. I've lived all over and I've never seen organizing like I've seen since I've lived in the South.
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So excited to be the new director for The Conference on Poetry at the Frost Place! We have an visionary, joyful, boundless week planned! Come join us. Cannot wait to make poems and worlds with you.
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It’s
#SuicidePreventionMonth
. My mom took her life when I was 13. I’ve struggled & struggle. If you’re having trouble staying: I love you, I see you, I never judge you. National Alliance on Mental Illness is great: Helpline: 800-950-NAMI
Or in a crisis, text "NAMI" to 741741
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Poetry Foundation and The Academy of American Poets each only having one poem by Vievee Francis on their sites is what's wrong with today and every day in Poetry.
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What if every single person on every recommendation letter simply and only wrote, “Please call me.”
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Tell me you live in the South without telling me you live in the South
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Dear Guggenheim Foundation, Asking for letters is exhausting and impossible. Please stop requiring so many letters. And just be honest if recommenders need to have received Guggenheims. Sincerely, Literally Everyone
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I thought I knew about the South before I moved to the South. I didn’t know anything. Best grassroots organizing game on the planet. Relentless passionate pragmatic insistence on a new & better world. Unbreakable & brilliant movements always led by Black people.
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At some point it might also be worth talking about the fact that AWP is another example in the poetry world of one organization/entity controlling the economic health of a majority of (in this case) presses. It's hard make good decisions when you're reasonably worried about money
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Everyone else may leave you, I will never leave you, fugitive.
— Jean Valentine
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Full of love. Free of pronouns. Proud of this many gendered Vessel. Full of anger and fight and alive. Existing. Here.
#TransRightsAreHumanRights
#Resist
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A poetry world where people’s response to my having been in an active shooter situation is to make sure I will have their ______ submitted in time is not a poetry world I want to be part of anymore.
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Getting the J&J shot today. Grateful and excited. A little nervous but I’ve heard it’s basically just a rough couple days. Here’s to getting to hug and high five and dance around together again!
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Bleeding basically everyday for 5.5 months straight. The doctors say, “you’ll get a hysterectomy at some point” but say insurance won’t cover it without even more procedures. This country is so messed up. I mean I know we all know. But here’s one small example. Worn out.
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That look she gave him made it all the way through the embalming fluid.
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Dear
@nytimes
articles where faculty are seen as the problem standing between students & a real education are overly simplistic & dangerous. They prove you don't have the first clue what professors do,how hard we work,& how much we care abut your children
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One of the best parts of the
@UNCResearch
piece about me was the amazing photos taken by Alyssa LaFaro. I felt so seen. Especially these outtakes that I think of as “Your Lesbian Grandpa Will See You Now”. Transitional lenses are here and I’m thriving
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Last day at
@RadInstitute
. Best walk to work for 9 months. Little goodbye feast. Please apply. This was the first fellowship I applied for in 23 years & got. I have a great life & have gotten other things but I’d given up on applying for stuff. Try one more time. Then once more
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Harsh writing advice: there are no more sour cream and onion chips in the cupboard. Go back to your desk.
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I’m having such a great time at
@breadloafwriter
. People keep saying to me, “I never get in.” You know what? I never did either. Now I’m teaching there. Keep on your path & doing your best. You’ll get there. And “there” is lots of places. And it’s almost never how you imagined.
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Ross Gay’s new book Be Holding is one of the best books of poetry I’ve ever read. September cannot come fast enough.
Rumpus Exclusive: Cover Reveal for <em>Be Holding</em>
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Like what if there was a fellowship where you got 600K and had to give 500K away to other artists/organizations/businesses you loved. That would be so cool. A philanthropy grant. And you could keep some for your own work & time. But also you could help others .
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First day adornment me and the trees! A prospective student walked by and their Dad gave me such a look of disgust! Well, Sir! You’re the exact argument why classes should find a way to be in person. Thank you for reminding me.
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Remember when syllabi were a page long and we still wrote good poems?
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Why am I not the kind of lesbian who knows how to fix a leak? I bet Adrienne Rich knew how to fix a leak.
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The Rona Jaffe Foundation is closing the prize and giving those funds to institutions to use. Which means the granting monies of Poetry are narrowed even further into the hands of a small number of Institutions/Judges. That’s not progress, folks. That’s predatory capitalism.
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Perfect 48th birthday weekend in Cambridge with Angeline. Tonight we’ll roast pumpkins! Later this week home for meeting w/doctor & surgeon. Lots of unknowns & sort of scared. And also so lucky! And glad for all the years & wanting lots more. Life! Who knew?
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Couple at Logan made a comment about my bow tie and got up and moved. Too bad. The woman’s Texas flag cowboy hat matched my ensemble perfectly.
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The first day I walk into any classroom (and many times after) I look around & try to figure out how I'll protect/save students if a shooter enters the room. So to say I'm not willing to risk my life for my students would be inaccurate.
#COVID19
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I think he’s trying to get out of the next debates. I think he’s going to tell his supporters that he’s had the virus and it’s nothing. I think this is really bad news.
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Bookstores should put a bookmark in every book they sell. I hope you have enjoyed my dissertation.
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Anyone who is leading anyone to believe that a person brandishing a gun in the STUDENT UNION at
@unc
is not a big deal because no one was shot is why we are nowhere on gun control in the United States of America.
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Not judging anything for 5 years soon. Instead, I'd love to just read & hear abt your manuscripts/poems. If I did 5 hourlong FREE consultations (read, listen, & talk : no written comments or edits) a month for BIPOC/LGBTQIA+/Folks living with disability would that be of interest?
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I just want a stylish pair of plaid pants thats not cropped flared gussied up. The kind of plaid pant you see a handsome woman at the Dallas airport wearing. An elegant librarian. A dapper butch art thief. How hard can it be?
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Gotta say: it’s always going to be a white guy whose brand new poem takes up 15 minutes at the protest when everyone else has talked for 5.
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I thought I’d watch less news but it turns out my favorite mode of self-soothing is watching Joe Biden do pretty much anything. Swearing staff in, folding paper, eating chips. Bring it.
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“ At the event, Gabrielle Calvocoressi will receive the 2023 Lucille Clifton Legacy Award.” ” The event I’m most excited for in 2023. To honor Lucille Clifton & to receive this award. And be with my first & forever teacher Mark Doty. “
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The national media is not saying that 40,000 citizens of Southern Pines, NC are without power because domestic terrorists used weapons to destroy a power substation in order to SHUT DOWN A DRAG SHOW.
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Omg. If you saw Randall Kenan walking across Sarah Lawrence’s campus in the 90’s? The elegance & ferocity & so fucking handsome. No one could look away from him. And I’m talking about a campus full of lesbians. In a day of deepest morning I do not want to forget he was a GOD.
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Last week I had to give up a part of my career that really mattered to me because I just couldn’t balance my job, my visual disability, and this thing that I loved doing. I think it’s important to tell those stories too. It’s difficult managing difference & keeping your job.
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Thanks to The New Yorker for featuring this poem about empire & self-hatred. And thanks to Stacey Schiff’s witches, Ross Gay’s Puritan , and Dickinson’s gun in the forest for helping me get into these hard new poems.
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Two days after uterine artery embolization. Painful still but on the mend. Thanks for all the texts, treats, kaftans! And thanks to
@whitewhalebks
for the coziest sweatshirt in the world! Piece by piece. Hope it works.
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When this terrorist event is over the Senators who supported and incited these people should be tried for treason.
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When I tell you you’re not ready for this book. You are not ready for this book. But also thank every god and angel in Heaven because we have all been waiting for this book.
#RossGay
#BeHolding
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Nothing in this world makes me angrier than working as hard as I have worked in my career only to be treated like an amateur.
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Back to solo life in Cambridge. Eating dinner at the single table at Thai Hut. Prepping for my talk this week at Smith: Mary Oliver: A Handsome Life. Queerness in the Poems & Essays.
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The new gold standard for: how empty were your office hours? So empty a possum sat on my foot.
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My cat passed away yesterday so I can eat as many Klondike Bars as I like is my entire curriculum vitae.
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Dream reader. Locked.
my mom reads poetry that makes her cry to get eyelashes out. i eventually decoded that this was a request for
@rocketfantastic
's wonderful poem "Miss you. Would like to grab that chilled tofu we love."
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Just a daily reminder that you are awesome. None of this is normal. It's insane that you have been asked to do ________ by ___________ o'clock during this time.
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7 months today I had my OBGYN procedure. 7 months of bleeding basically every day. 7 months of doctors acting like it’s no big deal. 7 months of drs refusing to do tests because of insurance. 7 months of trying to get new doctors. This system is so broken. We need another way.
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I just want to go grade at a coffee shop. First world problem beyond compare. Also I just want to go grade at a coffee shop.
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Sometimes you go down the Stevie Nicks Lindsey Buckingham Youtube rabbit hole and that's the afternoon
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