Robert Mays
@robertmays
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Host of The Athletic Football Show. Formerly of Grantland and The Ringer. maysnfl @gmail .com
Chicago, IL
Joined May 2010
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Here's my updated Chicago restaurant list for 2023.
These are all the spots I've visited over the past 2 years. It includes more than 100 spots.
There are pages by cuisine, neighborhood, and for my favorite restaurants.
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Greatest Bears QBs of all time:
1. Sid Luckman
2. Jay Cutler
3. Erik Kramer
4. Russell Wilson saying he'd play for the Bears
5. Jim McMahon
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Good thing Tom Brady doesn’t seem like the sort of person who’d be motivated by a perceived slight and endure an entire NFL season to prove a point.
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I have a lot of respect for Ryan Gosling's refusal to mail in anything ever. The man had a legitimately legendary performance in a fucking SNL digital short.
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Josh Allen is like a human monster truck with the soul of a labradoodle that's fueled by Four Loko.
A singular, unhinged experience.
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Huge for the Seahawks to get those two 1st-round picks.
Gives them the ammunition to trade for the next safety who hits the market.
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Some thoughts: The Bears trading a 4th-round pick and giving $20 million guaranteed to Nick Foles when Andy Dalton was available in FA only to sign Andy Dalton a year later — with Foles still on the roster — is objectively hilarious.
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And at least that game had a good excuse.
The Vikings beat the Raiders 3-0. It's the first 3-0 victory in the NFL since Pittsburgh beat Miami in 2007
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The kid at :08 is incredible.
Every child in Philly is born with the soul of a recently divorced dock worker who goes to the job with two Yuenglings in his pants pockets.
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Curtis Samuel and Terry McLaurin in Washington with Ryan Fitzpatrick is pure entertainment. Just speed and a QB with zero f—ks left to give.
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If Josh Allen were my team’s quarterback, I’d lose my mind every single Sunday but argue that he was good every time I had two beers.
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Rashod Bateman has been slowly shrinking since high school.
Comp: Keenan Allen/Benjamin Button.
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Lot of respect for Sean McVay pondering retirement and a chill life at home by age 37. Because that's also my 3-year plan.
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Just turned off the heat in my apartment. The flames coming off this take can warm an entire city block.
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The Seahawks putting all 4 of their running backs on the field at the same time just to throw an interception is the funniest thing that's ever happened on an NFL field.
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Let me repeat this: The Titans didn’t feel great about their QB situation, traded pennies for Ryan Tannehill (and his nothing contract), and they’re about to be one game from the Super Bowl.
YOU DON’T NEED TO ROLL WITH YOUR QB FOR THE SAKE OF IT.
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This has been the worst “Assemble the crew for one last job” movie ever.
The
#Jets
signed Allen Lazard for $44 million this offseason.
It's Week 12 and he's about to be a healthy scratch.
Not ideal!
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"So if you fumble out of bounds at the 1-yard line, you just get the ball back?"
Yes.
"And if you fumble out of bounds one yard closer, the *other team* gets the ball? At the 25-yard line."
Yes.
"Cool. Makes sense."
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I’m still thinking about Four Seasons Total Landscaping.
It’s objectively the funniest thing that’s ever happened.
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Hi friends. I’ve got some news to share:
After 4 years, I've made the decision to leave The Ringer for an exciting new opportunity. Moving on from a place and people I care about so much wasn't easy. And I can't possibly thank everyone in a single tweet. So I didn't try.
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You mean other than where your life went wrong?
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If Joe Brady can save Sam Darnold, I think Adam Gase has to leave the country.
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How bout this? If you score a goal, or hit a home run, or score a touchdown at the highest level of your sport — a place that took you a lifetime of work to reach — you can do whatever the fuck you want. I’d throw a goddamn parade.
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If the Bears actually trade anything of significance for Carson Wentz, I might stay in Tampa, buy a house boat, and just let myself drift out to sea.
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Sean Payton leaving the Saints as they're about to stare down the consequences from years of YOLO spending and draft-pick trades is like bailing after you and your buddies burned down an Air BnB following a week-long rager.
Gotta respect it.
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This dude in this uniform has an argument for the coolest player aesthetic of all time.
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3 years without a drink.
Getting to that first day was a long, tough road. But asking for help and getting sober truly changed the course of my life.
I'm so grateful for everyone who believed this could be me.
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In 2022, Justin Herbert and Khalil Mack — combined — will cost about $3 million less against the cap than Carson Wentz.
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Glad the Bears nabbed Nick Foles while they could. If they hadn't traded a fourth-round pick for Foles and his $15 million salary, they might have been forced to do something desperate. Like not giving up a draft pick and signing Cam Newton.
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Patrick Mahomes has now played 17 playoff games, so a full season.
His numbers in that "season" ...
67.4% comp, 4802 yards, 39 TD to 7 INT
.23 EPA/dropback
It's pretty much in line with his 2022 MVP numbers. Against the best teams, on the biggest stage, over 6 years.
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I cannot believe how much energy some people wasted arguing if Dak Prescott was really an elite quarterback.
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Dak Prescott sharing these feelings and his struggles was incredibly brave. Using his platform like this normalizes the conversation around mental health, and that matters. It's OK to admit that you're not OK.
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Then he'd comfortably be the best Chicago Bears quarterback of the past half-century.
Trevor Lawrence was viewed as a cant-miss quarterback.
Caleb Williams is being viewed as a can't-miss quarterback.
From what we know now, what's says Williams won't be the next Lawrence?
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Joe Thomas is the best player from a draft that included Calvin Johnson, Adrian Peterson, Patrick Willis, Marshawn Lynch, and Darrelle Revis. He was an All-Pro nine times in 11 seasons. He is, quite simply, one of the best players in NFL history.
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The league office should just step in and rule that Davante Adams is a free agent, and the Raiders get the 33rd pick in the draft. No financial ramifications for Vegas. No trade necessary. Just do what’s right for the sport.
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The Dolphins trotting out the 2 fastest guys in the league only for them to average fewer air yards per target than your typical TE is going to rule so hard.
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It’s been almost two years since Colin Kaepernick kneeled for the first time, and that choice still dominates conversation about the NFL. He hasn’t taken a snap in more than 18 months, and he’s the most influential player in football.
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Tired of people ignoring external factors when they talk about 4th down decision-making. The game isn't played on a spreadsheet.
Niners were clearly worried about the Slime Monster.
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4 years without a drink.
If you’re struggling and want to make a change, know it’s never too late. Telling the people close to me, “I have a problem, and I need help” changed the course of my life. I’m so grateful that I got that chance.
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So excited to finally share the news:
I’m joining
@TheAthletic
as the host of their new flagship NFL podcast. I’ll be hosting 3 times a week, with a cast of amazing co-hosts and guests:
@Nate_Tice
,
@bylindsayhjones
,
@SheilKapadia
,
@FB_FilmAnalysis
, and more. Please susbcribe!
🚨 Introducing The Athletic Football Show, featuring
@robertmays
🚨
Listen and subscribe for free wherever you get your podcasts or enjoy it ad-free on The Athletic.
🏈 Apple:
🏈 Spotify:
🏈 The Athletic:
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Playing against the Dolphins defense just doesn't seem fun.
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League leaders in carries of 10+ yards this season:
1. Nick Chubb (24)
2. Lamar Jackson (21)
3. Josh Jacobs (19)
4. Saquon Barkley (17)
5. DANIEL MF'ING JONES (15)
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I’m about 15 times more afraid of Bran at this point than any Night King.
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I'm in a remote part of the US right now, watchin the Cubs on an iPad at a bar. A 72-year-old man came up and asked if he could watch. His grandpa was blind and listened to Cubs games. He continued being a fan because of WGN. Don't listen when people tell you sports don't matter.
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Ya don’t say.
Jets QB Aaron Rodgers (Achilles) unlikely to play this year despite positive week, via
@RapSheet
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I'd contend that no great player in the NFL makes utter dominance look as casual as this guy. He looks bored doing this.
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The Bears picking Adam Shaheen over George Kittle is more embarrassing than picking Trubisky over Mahomes.
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Ten years ago today, I said goodbye to my dad for the last time.
Some days, it’s impossible to believe it’s been that long. Other days, it feels like it happened in another life.
Do me a favor: If you can, call your dad today. For no other reason than just to talk to him.
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“We were willing to trade 3 first-round picks for Burrow when we could’ve given up nothing to draft Justin Herbert instead” isn’t as good of a look as the Dolphins seem to think here.
Congrats on recognizing the QB with the best college season ever was a good prospect, though.
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The “Actually, Deshaun Watson isn’t that good” crowd has checked in, and they are hilarious.
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It’s gonna be more impressive than ever when the Patriots somehow win the Super Bowl this year.
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Re-watching Jordan Love from last Sunday, and I've got some rough news for Bears fans: I think it's officially done. He's just good. It really happened again.
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If Jamal Adams is worth 2 first-round picks, Deshaun Watson is worth *at least* 5. And I think that might be underselling it.
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This is one of the most athletic plays I’ve ever seen a quarterback make? The pump fake to flip his hips back and then just run AWAY from dudes for 50 yards?
SHEESH.
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Explaining football to curious little kids is revealing.
“What are they doing now?”
“This is called an extra point.”
“Why do they do that?”
Honestly, kid, that’s a great question.
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One of my least-favorite things about myself is how much I enjoy the “turning into your parents” Progressive commercials. Gotta do better.
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I’m on Eastern time for the next month, and do not understand how people consume the NFL in this time zone. It’s almost noon, and the games don’t start for another hour. This is a hellscape.
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Jay Cutler started 102 games for my team. I promise you this isn't true.
Kristin Cavallari says Jay Cutler unclogged her milk ducts by "sucking harder than he's ever sucked"
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I’m pretty sure Joaquin Phoenix just gave a speech about the dangers of egocentrism and didn’t thank a single person.
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I lost my dad 12 years ago today. Lately, I've been listening to the tapes he made me when he was sick. They sound so different as I get older. He's been gone a while, but I'm grateful that my relationship with him can still grow.
Do me a favor: If you can, call your dad today.
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Guys, the thing is, when you're down 8, you need to score a TD. And when you're down 5, you...still need to score a TD.
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Jay Cutler made $125 million playing football. I'd probably spend some time on the couch too.
Kristin Cavallari divorcing ‘lazy’ Jay Cutler because he was ‘unmotivated’
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Huge offseason for the Raiders.
Having Antonio Brown and Tyrell Williams to stretch the field really gives Derek Carr room to find Seth Roberts on underneath routes 15 times a game.
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The Saints now have Drew Brees and a backup quarterback who's better than like, a third of the starting quarterbacks in the league.
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Cameron Smith is every Australian guy you meet in a European hostel that convinces you to stay out drinking until 5 a.m.
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If you liked that game, just WAIT until you see Joe Flacco against Derek Carr.
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In the Garden of Eden, they lived life a quarter-mile at a time.
Scientists at Princeton University have reconstructed this 3D model of how Adam, the first human being created by God, might have looked
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I’m currently watching Travis Kelce play Richard Sherman at a live Madden event, and he’s throwing to himself on every play. You have to respect it.
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The Patriots letting another team pay Trey Flowers $16 million a year while they pay Michael Bennett half that (and not screw up their comp pick) is the most Patriots shit ever.
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It’s me. The idiot who finished a podcast about the Dak Prescott negotiations like 20 minutes ago.
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If only there was a reality show camera crew with unfettered access that could have provided some behind-the-scenes insight into the Antonio Brown saga in Oakland.
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Antonio Brown is gonna be a Patriot in like 12 minutes, and I’m gonna break stuff.
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Somehow, 23-year-old Gardner Minshew looks like your 58-year-old uncle that has a Coors Banquet permanently attached to his right hand.
Jaguars QB Gardner Minshew: “it breaks my heart” to see what happened to Nick Foles.
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Every primetime Bears game feels like I’m taking a poorly behaved relative to a party and being really worried they’re gonna embarrass me.
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Starting to think that Dak Prescott throwing for 400 yards a game might not have been the Cowboys’ problem.
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I can confidently say that Ed Reed is the coolest man that’s ever lived.
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Guys, the Bears are only a QB, three offensive linemen, two WRs, a safety, CB depth, a new defensive coordinator, and a different offensive approach away from contending. They're close, and the leadership knows this.
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Rob Gronkowski is the greatest player to ever play his position. He has the best per-game receiving stats ever for a tight end, could physically dominate anyone in the run game (through his last game), and he was endlessly enjoyable to watch. His legacy is that he was peerless.
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This is Leighton Vander Esch’s high school football field. He’s now starring in a billion-dollar palace.
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I’ve said this before, but:
Cincinnati is a consistently underrated American city. Every time I’m in Cincinnati, I’m happy to be spending time in Cincinnati.
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Lost my dad 15 years ago today.
Missed him a lot this past year. Wish he could've met my wife. Wish he could see how my life turned out. Wish we could talk about the Bears.
If you can, and you want to, give your dad a call for me today.
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Dabo Swinney, on college players getting paid: “That's where you lose me. I'll go do something else, because there's enough entitlement in this world as it is."
Also Dabo Swinney:
Breaking: Clemson has rewarded coach Dabo Swinney for leading the Tigers to two national titles in the past three seasons, announcing that they have agreed to a 10-year, $93 million contract.
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There has never been a quarterback like Patrick Mahomes. Not in terms of quality. In terms of the combination of arm strength, creativity, AND quality. He’s willing — and able — to play the position in a way we haven’t seen. We’re watching something.
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It’s gonna be a bummer when Rey slaughters all those Padawans for no reason.
The next
#StarWars
movie in 2022 will be from
#GameofThrones
showrunners David Benioff and D.B. Weiss
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I witnessed Brian Urlacher's entire career and got to watch Julius Peppers wreck shit for a few years.
And I still think Khalil Mack might be the best Bears defender of my lifetime.
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My little brother ordered almost $1,000 worth of Taco Bell for the late-night food at his wedding tonight, and I’m honestly not sure I’ve ever been more proud of him.
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