*entering the 30th minute of a driving test, the examiner leans in to their walkie talkie* RELEASE THE HORSE.

Finally started Yellowstone so if you see me cutting about in a Stetson and Levi’s just mind your business it’ll pass.

Yma o Hyd

@KingBobIIV @implausibleblog If somebody can walk in to your town with no qualifications, no contacts, no CV and basic English, then take YOUR job and buy your house - you are a resounding failure of a human being and should be embarassed to complain about it lmfao.

This is what the wokes want to take from us

HOW THE PYRAMIDS WERE MADE …

@allforthanookie I remember thinking Sam Harris was cool

Awful lot of JOIN THE ARMED FORCES KIDS adverts poppin up on YouTube which in my extensive experience as a sucker for ads and the wastrel failson in a military family means a massive pointless war is just on the horizon 👍🏼

Absolutely huge scenes in my house as Ray Liotta turns up in the film and I watch my girlfriend Google “Rayleigh Otter”.

My dog just ran out of a bush carrying a jock strap. He’s clearly found the dudes rock area of this particular woodland.

There’s a missing person post going around my area in which the lad is described as “handsome with an athletic build” and tbf if I ever go missing just throw that on the poster and I’ll resurface in seconds.

HOW DO YOU LIKE THOSE FUCKING APPLES

My gf has been a Utd fan for 21 minutes (since the start of this match) and is already calling Rasmus Hojlund, “Rasmus Toilet”. She’s a natural.

Just did a pomegranate face mask if that’s ok with the woke brigade

Watched Heretic. Hugh Grant having the time of his life. Thought there was a good twist but it turned out to be neither good or a twist. Still worth a watch. I will be watching Conclave, Loves Lies Bleeding, Civil War or The Substance next, pls feel free to suggest which one.

Somebody’s posted in the local residents group that a group of teenagers threw snowballs at their 8 month old baby. Sorry but this is very very funny.

@JoeStephenson96 Smells like a nice little Air BnB in the York Moores to me. Maybe even get in on some Flamingo Land action.

I’m obviously supposed to be taking care of my severely disabled son this weekend but in many ways, Shawn Michaels is the father he craves and deserves.

Don’t be Nosferatu curious just go and see it. It’s so silly and sexy. Nobody is taking themselves 100% seriously and this makes it even better than you anticipate. Orlok face reveal got a huge pop (looks like me). Willem Dafoe and Simon McBurney are a million bucks in this shit.