10:00 am ur alarm labeled “McGriddle Time” goes off, you go to golden McDonald’s and sit behind a yee yee truck for 15 minutes, you come home with 10 McGriddles. Your mother cries
the fact that UNC isn’t requiring a 2-week quarantine for all students before classes start is a clear indication that they aren’t even really trying and they know we’ll move online but it won’t happen till after everyone has paid their full tuition ✨
I’d probably make sure you aren’t doing a half-ass job of social distancing yourself before saying how much you hate the people going out to parties. Eating dinner with 8 of your closest friends at an indoor restaurant isn’t a good look either ✨
only CO theatre kids know how to steal like an artist give to the people. only CO theatre kids know how to make art my friends make art make a world my friends make a world
also so that when you inevitably catch Covid-19 in our crowded unsafe facilities that we’re deciding to open before it’s safe in order to take your money, we can say that we told you to wear a mask 🥰✨
UNC athlete insta bios b like:
sko BEARS🐻, COVID survivor, ALWAYS row, NEVER drift, the ROW never STOPS 💯
“that’s my goal, to blow up then act like I don’t know nobody”🙄
❤️Abby 4/15/20
🙏🏻Romans 8:11
every day i wake up and i lay in my silly little bed and then i sit at my silly little table and eat my silly little food and get my silly little stomachache and then i lay in my silly little bed and then i sit at my silly little table and then i lay in my silly little bed
that scene in glee when the deaf school is just trying to perform their arrangement of Imagine and the new directions decide to...sing over them??? And we were supposed to find that uplifting??? 🤢
hey it’s me! your high school acquaintance who took up rock climbing in college! would you like to see a closeup video of some brown rocks that pans down to show that I am high off the ground? would you like to see 5 more?
TSA agent: do you have any other metal on your person that I should know about?
me: well my nipples are pierced
TSA agent: oh my god bitch no way 🤭😳😉 haha omg did it hurt????
if you were working at centennial ikea click and collect today this tweet is to apologize for not putting my cart back I couldn’t find where to put it there was nowhere for it to go I’m sorry
male-identifying friends in the room: objectifying women around your “cool” female friends hurts them. Hurts their personal feelings and self esteems and ESPECIALLY hurts their ability to trust you. Lets them know you’re even more misogynistic when they aren’t around.
also i saw a tweet earlier that said if you’re a man and you see a woman being harassed in public you should walk up and pretend to be her boyfriend to get the harasser to leave...don’t do that? do something else that is not that
thinkin bout all the times i said smart correct things as a child and the adults in charge of me laughed them off because they didn’t immediately get it, they didn’t have to take the time to understand me, and i was smaller than them
here’s my mt hot take for the day. The key of Hard Knock Life is too high. Have you ever heard that song where all the children were hitting the note and none of them were screaming? take her down a whole step. let the children rest
imagine giving one of the worst auditions of your life and then it being immortalized next to a clip of the producers cringing in that montage of horrible At The Ballets in the chorus line documentary
“dude, we’re getting band back together” and “ready for the bettys” are BOTH in season one of phineas and ferb, I can’t believe they just...peaked immediately like that
it’s all “acapella is dumb” “acapella is stupid” until
@LilNasX
makes all the sounds with his mouth and then suddenly everyone is horny for an acapella arrangement
if you are thinking of playing an entire frank ocean album for that girl you’re trying to bone...go for it bro 100% she’s gonna love it congrats on the sex
Imagine: You graduate from Denver School of the Arts. You end up on the bachelor. He likes you and comes to your hometown. You lie and say you graduated from East
Imagine: You graduate from Hug High School. You end up on the Bachelor. He likes you and he comes to your hometown. You drive the McCarran loop twice and go to the view. You do not get a rose.
nobody is calling out your friend Brad The Good Cop saying he specifically caused slavery by himself, the POINT is that the system he works for (and chooses to continue to give his labor to) is built with malicious intent toward POC
Greeley people be careful on 10th between Gunter and Frasier at night, last night an older man yelled at me and then followed me and didn’t stop until I was visibly on the phone. Maybe he was a confused old man who really wanted to know the time but maybe he wasn’t so stay safe
Socially distanced Sociology! Very exciting to see some of our
#UNCBears
students on campus in
#uncosociology
courses with Dr. Angie Henderson and also with Dr. Rebecca Beals. As Dr. Beals’ mask indicates, “Everything is Fine” 😷 👍 🐻 📚
Bonus photo for the year: an alligator watches a rocket launch. In nearly 20 years of setting up cameras around the pads, I have never captured a gator in an image before. And more than just the eyes, they seem to be watching!
ladies...if a rando messages you on Instagram asking you to be his sugar baby.....it’s a scam....if you want a sugar daddy go find one, don’t send visa gift cards to some internet stranger.....
by far the most unrealistic thing about harry potter is the tables being separated into houses, anyone who has met an Adult knows that the students would b “sitting by someone you don’t know :)))”
this is my brat child who I don’t like. they are a brat because they sleep all day, don’t ever find the motivation to do the things they’re supposed to do, and have no appreciation for the life that I gave them. This is clearly because they hate me and wish I were dead xx
If I were JK Rowling I would’ve immediately thought of a spell that replaced caffeine and the fact that she didn’t do that tells me she’s clearly neurotypical