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my dad just called kelly clarkson a national treasure and started singing since u been gone at full volume
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balls balls balls balls
poop poop poooooop
fart fart
balls
𝘱𝘶𝘴𝘴𝘺
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i love being in nyc during fleet week. i feel like i’m in a fucking rogers and hammerstien musical and everyone’s about to start tap dancing around me. HELLO SAILOR
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she moves weird
It was you guys bringing up performances but since we’re at it, let’s continue because the expectations for swifties is in hell
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not to be cringe but i can literally feel my dreams coming true before my eyes right now. i’m finally getting my flowers and i am so happy that ive worked so hard to be here.
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being a woman is so hard because you can be the best possible version of yourself and people will always want something different. more niche and interesting and different and you can NEVER BE COOL ENOUGH!!!!
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i don’t like taylor swift. but when a MAN doesn’t like taylor swift?????? red flag. why do you hate women.
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where do you put your boob when you play guitar. this is a man’s world :(
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men are so sub par at things and they just get away with it
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i was wrong
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how did i pass my carnegie mellon prescreen what on earth
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Not to be dramatic, but boygenius wearing the pink carnation??? Just kill me right now. Oh my God.
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why do taylor swift fans get so shocked when she plays two surprise songs every night that she (surprise!) hasn’t sang. THIS HAPPENS EVERY SINGLE CONCERT OF THE TOUR GET OVER ITTTR
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“i would bully him so hard he’d kill himself” -my mom on young sheldon
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i want brian mccoy to play piccolo trumpet at my funeral
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i don’t like taylor swifts music very much but i can appreciate another blonde woman with consistently terrible boyfriends
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this isn’t a social gathering this is a fight to the death
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woke up and realized that she’s just being completely insane and i did nothing wrong. ah sweet victory
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is it normal to be with your friends and be like wow i am the worst at being a person out of all of us
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college auditions are so humbling because now i have a violent illness after spending 12 hours at pearl studios
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i wonder how non obsessive non crazy girls live. is it fun????? it doesn’t seem fun
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you haven’t lived until you’ve seen hitler getting a blowjob from genghis khan while seated next to your father
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someone needs to fly me out to italy so i can go summer in milan with my swiss boyfriend. WHY AM I HEARTBROKEN THIS WOULD ONLY HAPPEN TO ME.
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life would be so much better if everyone could read music
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i’ve been slacking on twitter becauee i have nothing to complain about
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sometimes i think i want a boyfriend and then i remember i already have a vibrator and problems
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nobody prepared me for the way i’d feel singing with a full orchestra for the first time
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rumored great gatsby run in boston w darren criss as gatsby… i
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just because i’m playing hard to get doesn’t mean im hard to get
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i could talk about legally blonde 2023 for hours on end you guys have no idea the turmoil it causes in my head
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“do you want to hang out and catch up” yes the fuck i do happy thanksgiving
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every gay woman on long island is connected by two common threads
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watching whiplash for the 5th time around im literallt andrew
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men being batman for halloween is just an excuse to wear guyliner (i eat it up every time)
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“young sheldon? how long are they gonna let this fucker tuck his nuts back??” - my dad on young sheldon
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i like to live life on the fine line between horny and horrifically sad
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who invented motor boating
??? they need to be put down via lethal injection
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how do i learn to do what i want and also develop self control. i need both but how do i acquire such????
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i have done all this work for myself by myself, and [REDACTED] just gets set up for success because [REDACTED] doesn’t have the capacity to do the work alone. WHY DON’T I RECEIVE ANY ASSISTANCE? I DESERVE IT.
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happy couples actually depress me so bad. like what how is that a real thing thay real people do
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i can’t believe i got blocked on everything because of a taylor swift concert i didn’t even go to. WHAT
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teachers don’t beat students like they used to (targeted)
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idk about these so-called aliens until they can tell me who the passwordgate narc was
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why would phoebe bridgers release graceland too. absolutely gut wrenching. WHATEVER SHE WANTS. UGHHHHHHHHHHHH
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he just liked my instragram story, what’s next??? penetration????
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girlhood is knowing all three harmonies to every boygenius song
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why does lana del rey roll her r’s in let the light in???? ok lanita
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my grandmas divorce attorney is representing the gilgo beach killer
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why are you trying to prove your intellectual superiority to me right now. 1.) you’re literally dumb and 2.) this does not matter. anything to one up me
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he does this thing where i forget about him for too long, so he’ll text me 8 good pictures of him so i remember he’s hot. it’s admirable honestly and it usually works.
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i need a win so badly everyone pray tomorrow goes well for me. all my manic pixie dreamgirling has led me to this.
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we need a sorting hat but for bfa programs so i don’t have to suffer anymore
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the mom in hereditary probably has the craziest sex
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