Michael Katagaya
@mkatagaya
Followers
6,369
Following
3,617
Media
852
Statuses
8,956
•Co-founder @evidence_method @makanikadotcom • Ford Fellow • @UNLEASHLAB SDG Talent •Author • Colossians 3:23 • Data • Civic-tech • @newvisionwire Top40Under40
Uganda
Joined February 2012
Don't wanna be here?
Send us removal request.
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
Jack Smith
• 460598 Tweets
FEMA
• 449115 Tweets
Messi
• 168089 Tweets
SURPRISE FROM BECKY
• 142344 Tweets
Kalafina
• 97635 Tweets
Maui
• 93991 Tweets
Padres
• 76644 Tweets
Royals
• 61938 Tweets
Junior
• 59435 Tweets
Orioles
• 44570 Tweets
Inter Miami
• 43494 Tweets
GOLD RUSH
• 35460 Tweets
Brewers
• 32329 Tweets
Braves
• 31461 Tweets
プロデューサー
• 27037 Tweets
学園アイドルマスター
• 26383 Tweets
#नवरात्रि
• 23309 Tweets
岡田監督
• 22032 Tweets
Sant Shri Asharamji Bapu
• 21163 Tweets
梶浦さん
• 19008 Tweets
Shakti Upasana
• 18570 Tweets
#今年も新作スイーツラテ飲みたーーーーい
• 18301 Tweets
Saint Dr MSG Insan
• 17991 Tweets
ميسي
• 17636 Tweets
Mendoza
• 16574 Tweets
渋沢栄一
• 15192 Tweets
マナー講師
• 15164 Tweets
#もうすぐ三角チョコパイの季節
• 14982 Tweets
マナー違反
• 13630 Tweets
藤川球児
• 12997 Tweets
Dalmau
• 12301 Tweets
Here is a good Ugandan story I must tell!
Yesterday (Sunday) evening I transacted at an ATM at Total Kyanja, but I only picked the card and drove away. I was exhausted and distracted.
When I reached my destination, I realized I didn’t have the money and surely I must have left
478
671
4K
Am a very happy parent! My askari (guard) scored 13 points!!! Am teary!
Context: I asked someone to get me a guard. When he reported, I realized he was young. We chatted about education & agreed he goes school & that I’d pay fees! Just as we’d done with the househelp. Am glad!🕺
261
325
2K
Ooh yes!! Someone has finally said what many others know but fear to say about Uganda 🇺🇬!!
166
653
2K
You remember the COVIDEX people
@JenaHerbals
?
They made this ka thing JENACOF DS!! Goodness! 10mls and the boy stops coughing, instantly! 🤣🤣
Uganda has so many things that are underrated!
211
407
2K
Wuhu wuhu!! Wulululu!
Remember this my guy?! My askari that I took back to school? He’s been admitted at
@Makerere
!!! He wanted to study Bachelor of Procurement and Supply Chain Mgt, and he’s got it! Yayyy!!!!!
Am a happy parent!
Now, Lord give me tuition! 🕺
Am a very happy parent! My askari (guard) scored 13 points!!! Am teary!
Context: I asked someone to get me a guard. When he reported, I realized he was young. We chatted about education & agreed he goes school & that I’d pay fees! Just as we’d done with the househelp. Am glad!🕺
261
325
2K
70
196
1K
A Ugandan chef, Dorcus Kirabo, commonly known as Mama D,
@Mama_d256
, is trying to break a world cooking record, by doing a “marathon” of cooking spanning several hours non-stop. She’s preparing different meals, serving the food to mostly urban poor and supporters.
Here to cheer
30
256
1K
Arrest anyone who serves tea 🍵 with just tea leaves.
No ginger. No kisubi. No mujaja. No cinnamon. No mint. No cocoa. No vanilla. No hibiscus. Not even just grass grass. Just tea. In this uganda.
Arrest!
59
241
1K
🤣🤣🤣🤣bano abato mujja bawuliramu.
You kept us millennials and our parents in fear of Kony and past regimes, naye bano?
What are you going to lie to them? Nti Amin and Lakwena will return if you leave power? Nti you attacked and killed sleeping sickness??! Wapi! 🤣🤣
We are NOT your grandchildren!!
And for goodness’ sake, stop with your patronizing long speeches and history! If you want to teach, get a USE school. Ooops, you’re past retirement age!!
Ugandans are NOT your children. We are CITIZENS, and you owe us a duty, not patronage!!
135
1K
3K
49
336
1K
Someone asked her “not to include politics in her content” - basically she should be twerking and joking like other TikTokers from here, right?
“The politics is personal, the personal is political”! The day we appreciate that “everything falls on leadership” we will be better
55
251
964
So emotional 🥲. It looks like this is a child and parents who gave their all to go through school just like majority of us. Congratulations to them.
I know the job market is rough, and even tougher for folks like these perhaps with less connections and other privileges.
I am
This is the cutest video I have watched on Internet today. Success must be celebrated in the simplest ways possible. I don't know you but congratulations Vanessa. May God's favor be with you as you embark on finding a Job incase you don't have one already.🙏🙏
248
755
4K
49
151
934
FINALLY!!! After I stormed
@nwscug
offices in Kasangati with jerrycans last week asking for water, the engineers and managers have been busy finding a solution to our water problems!
Don't tell me
#CitizenAction
doesn't work especially if it meets
#ResponsiveAuthorities
!
33
149
659
Oooh!! Heartwarming! The coolest thing you’ll see/hear on the Internet today.
Yes, she’s right. That’s what it’s like to live in Uganda 🇺🇬
Source: Internet
30
148
670
On shooting suspects:
The Kenyan govt held me as a suspect for the 2010 Kampala coach bombing in Nairobi that almost took my life 🙉😭. Partly coz when the bomb went off, I dropped my travel documents as I was rushed, with fellow victims, to Kenyatta Hospital for treatment.
1/3
23
256
635
Remember that story about Geoffrey the guard who kept and returned my money at the
@AbsaUganda
ATM?
The good people at Absa picked interest in it, invited Geofrey and I to meet, THE MD. The MD guys! He listened to the guard’s story - it was teary btw
Earlier this week
@mkatagaya
shared a story about how Geoffrey who works as a security guard with
@G4s
at our ATM in Kyanja had returned funds left in the ATM dispenser. I was honored to meet Geoffrey yesterday and learn his life story.
I was particularly impressed by his
32
68
410
60
116
634
You work in Bugolobi, why are you renting in Kira and not Kitintale or Mbuya??!
63
56
564
Convert it into affordable one bedroom units at UGX 1M. About 600 units would fetch good income while saving city dwellers the long commute from dusty Bulindo.
70
79
574
Many Ugandans fear “sensitive” topics. If it sounds a bit “political” then they’d rather avoid it.
The debate on the quality of roads is important to all of us, whether you like your maize boiled or roasted.
26
120
558
Last night I found out that a friend has been dealing with a chronic disease for years. Sometimes we chat late in the night because they’re awake battling medication, insomnia. It broke me. How did I miss the hints? How didn’t I notice the abrupt weight gain? How…? 🥲
To all my
29
112
565
I told a boda guy that he couldn’t ride with me on the wrong side of the road - on a one-way lane. I told him it’s not only illegal but also dangerous because there’s on-coming traffic - we’d easily get knocked.
He asked me who I think I am 🤣🤣🤣
It’s becoming harder and
133
69
522
2
362
500
When you stop at the traffic lights at this time, almost 3:0am, the guys from behind you think you’re foolish. Everyone hooting! What a community!🤣
94
34
475
Whoever took the decision to downgrade this section of Saddler Way, infront of
@kampalaparents
school, to murram you’re a genius - this country doesn’t deserve you!
@KCCAUG
@UNRA_UG
if you guys did this, pothole problems would be solved in the meantime as you look for money.
47
45
426
Learnt something new this week:
“Wekake olowooze”
(Force yourself to think. Try!)
Kampala!
🤣🤣🤣
12
86
429
You’re not even turning over $150,000 a year but “book an appointment with my PA”. I mean even if you are 😳😳🤣🤣🤣
Abaana mweyagalidde mu zi startups.
Anyway, Mr Busy, I’ll take the opportunity to someone more humble.
51
46
406
Life is harsh to everyone. A 23 year old male colleague says he’s already tired of dating! He says:
- You take out a girl thinking she likes you kumbe she just wants to change diet - all she wants is food!
- Girls in his age range are dating wealthy men, so sweet things like
108
80
400
I ordered for a trampoline. Ladies and gentlemen, online plug has delivered. I said the word several times while placing the order 😂.
What next? Because, I can’t accept dat!
108
38
367
A suspect is a suspect and they should be treated as such. As someone who was MISTAKEN for a terrorist & freed after thorough INVESTIGATION, it brings me tears to see a person killed upon being suspected of participating in crime, even as big as terrorism.
3/3
8
77
338
“I said I, not you”
Hahaha reminds me of when Hon. Aggrey Awori said Museveni has sleeping ministers.
When he was asked to apologize on the floor of parliament, he requested the speaker to ask all the sleeping ministers to come in front so he’d apologize to them, sending the
VIDEO: Richard Sebamala: I rarely debate shallow.
Dr Tanga Odoi: Who is debating shallow?
#NBSMorningBreeze
#NBSUpdates
282
300
1K
14
72
349
As soon as I entered the living room, the two female family members (early 30s) I found there moved out, smiling.
Me: Ba dear, where are you going?
Them: Outside. There’s fresh air. We don’t want to watch news.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Young people don’t like news. Shall we change
106
26
317
I am for digitizing, any day any time, but for taxes I think the problem is not who’s paying and who’s not. The big issue is what we do with what we collect. We have too many leakages. First fix the holes in the basket.
People must see what taxes do. It’s senseless to pay tax,
VIDEO: We are going to digitize the entire tax system. - PSST
@rggoobi
#NBSMorningBreeze
#NBSUpdates
24
29
145
24
94
314
I sent a male friend to buy Scrabble and it has arrived. It's now clear why ladies must draw on shopping lists.
22
56
305
The country is celebrating a conference hall. Conference hall? Gypsum and lights?😢
Not that it’s bad (kudos btw) but confirmation that we’re many years behind and need to work harder and faster till a time when a good road, classroom, hospital etc doesn’t surprise anyone.
21
80
305
@nbstv
“I said I, not you”
Hahaha reminds me of when Hon. Aggrey Awori said Museveni has sleeping ministers.
When he was asked to apologize on the floor of parliament, he requested the speaker to ask all the sleeping ministers to come in front so he’d apologize to them, sending the
40
41
303
@_LeratoMabuzaM
Love God, build spiritual habits - it becomes harder as you age with more world pressures, when you need a stronger boy to rely on.
Read about money. Study it. Get obsessed with keeping and investing every penny you make. Start by reading Robert Kiyosaki’s Rich Dad Poor Dad. It
3
30
272
Whoever reintroduced bowling in Kampala wants me broke.
If it’s it involved shooting targets, am the guy for the job.
30
15
269
Four ministers under Ministry of Trade, Industry and Cooperatives, a Permanent Secretary, and the URA Commissioner General (almost with the power of a minister) couldn’t resolve this impasse with the traders? Honestly that’s a small thing that required basic stakeholder
77
53
267
I’d love to go to Mandela National Stadium. Not to just watch a match but to also tour. I’d love to see sculptures of Uganda’s favorite players from the past, touch
@masindeonyango
’s gloves, see Massa’s boots with which he shot a ball that tore the net, even that ball and torn
27
60
266
About last night. Stocking JESA for the enumerators. Btw are we supposed to feed them? How many are coming? Any food allergies? 🤣
39
20
231
When other people were busy stealing land in Kololo in the 60s, my grandparents 👇🏿in bell bottoms 🫢😳🤣
22
54
212
Have you guys seen this campaign by
@AgoraCFR
called
#TextTheThief
?
Yeah. June has decided to end like this. And, July is going to be a busy month for many leaders 🤣
9
54
209
Afande brother
@AKasingye
call your friends to release people’s children. They have no crime. They should instead focus on fighting the criminals giving Ugandans sleepless nights and bad days.
Make that phone call.
#UnpopularOpinion
#312
. Inspite of the differences in strategy, the voices are so clear. Corruption must end. I pray that the
@PoliceUg
release those arrested. This will help build a mass movement against the corrupt. We lose focus when we fight each other than the perpetrators.
378
990
3K
2
76
206
@UncleBob256
@G4S
Indeed. We were both too excited to even talk about the schedule 🤣🤣. But I guess he works there at night - they’re usually rotated.
4
2
202
Yes, the househelp. Similar story with the boy. Her story is even more complex. She also passed her O level in the recently released exams!
3
16
196
For men only. Honest men.
Here is the perfect back up plan. Oba ani yatonda JESA?!
33
24
193
Happening now:
Armed men arresting members of various youth focused organizations who were about to address a press conference on corruption.
@denis2pato
of
@vijanacorps
and at least 4 others have been taken to unknown locations.
@GovUganda
@JudiciaryUG
is it now a crime to
15
156
188
@erich_mboowa
So emotional 🥲. It looks like this is a child and parents who gave their all to go through school just like majority of us. Congratulations to them.
I know the job market is rough, and even tougher for folks like these perhaps with less connections and other privileges.
I am
17
15
183
After treatment I went to police to pick the documents and they held me.
Long story short. They investigated and realised I was innocent and released me. They apologized on their behalf, on behalf of the government and the people of Kenya.
Imagine they had shot me???!!
2/3
2
35
153
A whole bank MD made time, while these ends in the ghetto, people with startups are sending us to their PAs 🙈🙈🤣🤣🤣
15
11
158
Banks declare to the regulator that they’ve written off loans, then send contacts to debt collectors to harass customers 🤣🤣🤣🤣.
Era if
@BOU_Official
was an institution that responds to tweets they’d have a lot of customer feedback and have evidence to debate with banks.
22
39
157
@melvinnasasira
It actually surprises that Ugandans pay a lot of taxes but lack the agency to hold government accountable and to push for better service delivery.
Anyone who complains has “lugezigezi”.
10
29
137
Tia has already taken sides. Now trying to understand if it’s DP or NUP. Kyoka she looks yellow! 😳
@JoelSsenyonyi
(NUP),
@norbertmao
(DP) and
@norbertmao
(yellow) I’ll be coming soon for initiation whenever she clarifies.
5
8
134
Guys! Why do you allow a boda boda to carry you on the wrong side of the road?! Why?!
Just witnessed two accidents in a space of about 150 meters in Kisaasi because of this problem!
@PoliceUg
@Akeda4
@MakanikaDotCom
@KCCAUG
@UNRA_UG
et al. We have a lot of work to do!
32
29
129
My 7y/o son just told me he’s now chosen a team to support. Manchester United. Yes, Man U🥹🥹
I’d like to apologize to him and anyone who looks up to me for failing as a father.
Anyway, it might help him with character development 🙏🏿.
29
20
122
Bwahahaha I asked ChatGPT if heaven exists. Then based on the answer I responded in Luganda wondering if “Chat” won’t go to hell. The response! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
28
10
119
Am overwhelmed by your feedback. You guys this world has good people! Thank you all for whatever you’re doing for the least of our society. Be encouraged.
1
3
116
Hi
@KFCinUganda
your billboard in Kyanja has fallen down during the heavy downpour moments ago. Notify your contractor. It’s likely to disrupt traffic. Sorry and good luck 🤞🏿 🙏🏿
12
11
112
Ugandans who are angry about this because of how she describes some of our food, may you heal. I also hope you’ll understand that some cultures and languages are direct in their expressions.
9
2
111
@CanaryMugume
Someone introduced me to a ka tablet called mosedine - the lady said if it doesn’t work come back for your money.
It does wonders.
If you fancy natural medicine, blend a pineapple with no water (okay you’d add a few drops for your stomach). It’s Drinking it before going to bed
13
17
111
@MalingaIr
Friend, am overjoyed! I have paid fees for countless folks, but these two stories?! Oooohh!
1
0
109
If they don’t invite you to eat rice today, just drink your JESA and chill. Today I recommend the strawberry 🍓 milk. Same colour as pilau but even more nutritious, tastier - plus you don’t have to wash dishes 🙏🏿 🤣
13
9
108
Basil’s Dental Clinic is the GOAT of dental care! I am not their influencer am just a happy client. They’re super organized.
I only wish I (and other citizens) were getting such good service for free (or at a subsidized fee) from a public hospital.
18
18
104
But you guys Jinja is organized! On maps and in reality streets look like somewhere in New York.
Unfortunately only about 1 or 2 roads are passable. No functional government hospital. What used to be great public schools have now wasted away! 😳.
You people are bad!
15
20
97
I support eviction of people from wetlands. But ensure that it’s EVERYBODY, EVERYWHERE. Selective application of the law is unfair.
Also after they’ve been evicted, don’t give the land to yourselves or your investors.
6
19
90
Imagine instead of trying to gamble with manufacturing vehicles we created a garbage plant that converts it into things like pavers, road/house construction material etc - for sale! It would create jobs and revenue faster, while saving lives and environment.
Who’s running this
25
25
90
@SarahBireete
@Educ_SportsUg
@JanetMuseveni
@JosephSsewungu
@Thomas_Tayebwa
Tough. But surprisingly this is how some of us managed to turn into responsible human beings. Many parents would hand over kids, they failed to discipline, to schools schools to manage.
Obviously, our current generation of parents picked trauma from that and now we won’t touch
4
9
87
About 2024 years after Christ, Saddler Way Naguru, the road in front of Kampala Parents School gets some tarmac! Yay!!
Kati folks asking for tarmac on Jinja-Luuka-Kamuli road……maybe another 1000 years? To be realistic?
18
10
82
How’s it even possible?! So many negative DNA tests these days. Could it be that there’s something wrong with the tests?
We might be fearing women but when the real issue are faulty tests. This is me trying to be openminded 😏
Ugandan Man Working in Europe Left in Shock after DNA Shows all 6 Children are Not His |
#ChimpReportsNews
31
37
191
39
9
80
@GODFREY_Kutesa
My brother, yes texting can be weird especially for formal communication but;
1. If you’re dealing with younger people you’ve got to know that this is the texting generation. Just like our parents or grandparents were the “walk there” generation and we were the call bundle
9
8
79
If you can’t hold a decent university election, you’ve not reached the maturity and discipline a society needs to manufacture cars and generally innovate to change tomorrow. You can’t compete with Japan, Korea etc.
5
17
77
Yap! And a huge portion of the funds goes to other “less privileged” churches and communities in and outside Uganda.
@watotochurch
has a very unique model on how to be “the church”. Highly recommended.
Watoto guys gave 34.4 billion to God in 2023 and Watoto Ntinda alone gave close to 5billion.
119
145
1K
2
14
76
A very short JESA JUS story. I hope JESA is planned to make a bigger version. Ka thing is nice!
7
11
76
The roads in Western Uganda! Like Bad Black says, wo wo wo wo!! Kudos
@UNRA_UG
,
@GovUganda
and partners!
Meanwhile, Luuka district does not have a single kilometer of tarmac. The road from Jinja (via Magamaga) to Luuka to Kamuli is like a garden.
34
18
75
Listen, in a country like Uganda, having a driver’s license, passport, bank account, one additional professional qualification & skill places you ahead of millions of people. Yes, just that. Do it. Do it now. Do it for you & yo kids.
I’d explain but you won’t get it. Just do it.
1
16
75
Government perfectly displaying the collapse of citizen engagement.
People are fighting over EFRIS (a not-so-bad thing btw) because government didn’t do proper engagement.
Now, you want to mess up census, first by failing to do proper citizen engagement (folks down here have so
13
23
73
@PoliceUg
a thief has just stolen my side mirror about 5 minutes ago, right infront of the Jinja road cameras next to Electoral Commission.
Please help get him, surely those cameras should help. You got the one who kicked someone, you should get this one too. Tia is the second
25
47
71
Could this country’s hope on citizen agency be in the younger generation? Show me 30 and 40 year olds who’d do this? We’re selfish bana 🤣
I’m so proud of these students
They did an heroic act to fight for their fellow students
140
494
2K
7
12
69
@MustaphaMugisa
If you spend 300K on Umeme you have capacity to run a washing bay or a small radio station.
Also, show me an ordinary Ugandan who pays a househelp 400K. I have done a survey on this before among several families. Most folks pay 100K.
But yes. It’s generally hard to live a
7
4
64
7
7
61
@DrOtileUg
@G4S
Hahaha silly! Of course he’s from where you think he’s from. But have police stations there closed because there’s no crime? Anyway bambi he’s an honest guy.
1
1
59