Alice Mills
@millsalice144
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Following
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Statuses
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Jesus. Art. Literature. Healing. Snark. Shaking it up in Alaska...Married with 6 kids. Writer for TruPlay games.
Eagle River, AK
Joined April 2015
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My latest blog. I’ve never written on hell before, but there’s always a first time…
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I have a joke about modern worship music.
I have a joke about modern worship music.
I have a joke about modern worship music.
I have a joke about modern worship music.
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The Bible is the only book whose Author is always present when we read it.
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Could use prayer. Lady threw herself in front of my car on the highway to kill herself. I managed to almost stop but her leg was injured. Please pray for her.
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The CEO of IKEA was just elected Prime Minister of Sweden.
He’s currently assembling his cabinet.
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My step-daughter just checked herself into rehab. Please join with me in praying for her healing from addiction and mental illness.
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Urgent! Please pray for 19-yr-old Otis who is on life support after an attempted suicide.
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Praise Report! I just got a job at the University of Alaska as a part-time professor. I was really praying for a certain salary and they offered me more than I would have asked. This is a real answer to prayer for me. He is a good, good Father.
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My youngest, Polly, is quarantined in her dorm room with a bad case of Covid. Would love prayer for her.
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Please pray for my mother-in-law, Pauline. She is in the hospital with Covid. She is 92 and I don’t know if she knows Jesus. I am trusting God for healing and salvation.
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Someone need to hear this:
Even to your old age and gray hairs
I am he, I am he who will sustain you.
I have made you and I will carry you;
I will sustain you and I will rescue you.
Isaiah 46:4
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How many times do you have to click Accept Cookies before they send you the cookies?
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Last night I was attacked by the enemy while I slept. I awoke to feeling as if I was being choked. I managed to just say, ‘Jesus, Jesus’ over and over and gradually it left. I was not afraid but the warfare over this women’s conference is rough. Please pray for me and the women.
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It’s kind of ironic that computers now ask humans to prove they’re not robots.
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Have a prayer request: am counseling a disabled woman whose husband is abusing her. Please pray that she would be able to break free, that her pastor would support her, and that God will grant safe haven for her and her children. My heart is broken for her and her kids.
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As I walked through a hotel lobby, I saw a group of chess enthusiasts playing in a tournament, each one bragging on how good they were. I guess you'd call it chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.
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These gas prices are probably why those armies in Revelation are riding horses.
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Praise report: My son just cleared a big debt, the doc caught pre-cancerous polyps in my husband in time, and my last chapter is coming along nicely. To God goes all the glory. What’s He doing for you?
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Why are there PopTarts but no MomTarts? Because of the pastryarchy.
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It’s sad how Wile E. Coyote is remembered for his failure to catch Road Runner and not his brilliant paintings of tunnels.
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My husband asked me to put peanut butter on the grocery list. Now I can’t even read it.
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Puns require intelligence to write, to communicate, and to understand. Not everybody can excel at it. Among the puns in the world, few have been written about steak. Therefore, if you successfully amuse people with such a pun, you could call that a rare medium well done.
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I debated a Flat Earther once. He got so mad he said he was going to walk to the ends of the earth just to prove me wrong.
He’ll come around eventually.
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Could use some prayer: I suspect I am developing an abscessed tooth. Would love healing and/or a dentist to call me back. Can’t get a call back on even their emergency numbers.
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My fifteenth anniversary is today and I am so grateful to be married to a kind man who I can really respect. It’s not perfect, but it’s really good.
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I bet you 194726494 dollars you didn’t read that number. You didn’t even realize I put a letter in it.
No, I didn’t, but I bet you went back and checked.
You owe me a like.
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My community could use some prayer. Avalanche separated 100 families from town without electricity. 80 ft of unstable snow makes for dangerous conditions for rescue teams.
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Eagle River hike today. God’s creation is so glorious, even an 11 mile hike is a worshipful experience!
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Does it offend you if someone says ‘God told me ...?’ Do you believe that God speaks to us individually or only through the Bible?
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At a costume party-
Host: What are you?
Me: A harp.
Host: Harps are much larger than that.
Me: Are you calling me a lyre?
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I remember when it was free to pump up your tires. Now it’s $1.50.
Must be inflation.
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I got to minister to a 16 year-old girl named Zowie. She accepted Jesus into her heart tonight. Please send up a prayer for her that the Word would take root and bear fruit in her life. She is a precious Hawaiian girl that Jesus reached tonight for His kingdom.
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I just got a job in a bicycle shop. I'm the new spokes person.
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I changed my GPS voice to Bono. Now the streets have no name and I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.
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My teacher told me that in the future I wouldn’t have to worry about spelling because of autocorrect. And for that, I will be eternally grapefruit.
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Wanted: Someone to brush their teeth with me because 9/10 dentists say brushing alone doesn’t prevent tooth decay. No weirdos.
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Thank you all for praying for my 92 year old mother-in-law. She was discharged from the hospital today. It is a total miracle.
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I got stuck behind a car with the license plate G4ND4LF.
I don’t know who it was but he wouldn’t let me pass.
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*baby crying on a plane*
Man sitting next to me: There’s nothing worse than a baby crying on a plane.
Me pulling out a kazoo: Let’s test your hypothesis, sir.
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Abraham was the smartest man in the Bible.
He knew a Lot.
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Praise report: with our prior insurance, my husband’s meds were $500 a month which was very hard. But today, with new insurance and coupon, they are only $10. Praise the Lord. This is a real answer to my prayers.
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I’m not bored during this time of social distancing... I just find it interesting that there are 10234 grains of rice in one bag and 10438 in the other.
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Worried about your smartphone and laptop spying on you?
Your vacuum has been gathering dirt on you for years.
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Due to the quarantine, I wil only be telling inside jokes.
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I hear that the Flat Earth Society are worried that social distancing will push people over the edge.
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To all who prayed for my daughter, Polly, she has finally turned a corner. She is able to get out of bed after two weeks of misery.
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A truck carrying a load of Vick’s Vapor Rub overturned on the freeway.
Amazingly there was no congestion for twelve hours.
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When God created the heavens and the earth, He knew what He was doing. A moment of His peace for you to enjoy...
#Alaska
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I am meeting the woman who attempted suicide in front of my car and her family. They have asked me to come pray with them. She suffered from schizophrenia. What the enemy I ted for evil, God can use for good.
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Abba, I pray for all the bloggers using social media to promote the Gospel. I ask for protection from hate and the endurance to keep writing for the sake of the 1,not just the 99. I ask for the fresh wind of your Holy Spirit to breath new life into our posts. Inhabit our words.
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70% of Earth is water and most of it is non-carbonated.
Turns out Earth is flat…
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I started a band called 999 megabytes… we still haven’t gotten a gig.
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If 666 is the most evil number, would 25.8069758 be the root of all evil?
*not a theological statement. Don’t ruin my funny.
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Praise Report: Just found out I don’t have to move. This is a direct answer to prayer! Am so grateful!
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Praise report: My shoulder got healed at church today after prayer. I am so grateful for our healing Lord!
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If I had a nickel for every bread pun, I’d have a pun per nickel.
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If you take a social
media sabbatical, don’t announce it. Just make your last post something fun like “I wonder if there’s a bear in this cave?”
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When I found out I was holding the taser the wrong way, I was stunned.
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Prayer request: Monday I go to court as a support to a woman divorcing her abusive husband. We need protection and justice. He is one bad dude and she is very afraid of him. He has a lawyer but she does not.
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If the mantis are always praying what is their faith?
It varies, they’re all in sects.
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If there is no Mr. and Mrs. Potato Head, does that mean there won’t be any more tater tots?
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It's a shame nothing is built in the USA anymore. Just bought a TV and it said
"Built in Antenna"
I don't even know where that is.
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I couldn’t find my pizza cutter so I used my Bryan Adams CD.
It cuts like a knife.
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I saw a microbiologist today. He was much bigger than I expected
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I got my paycheck and the envelope was full of parsley…
Someone garnished my wages.
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I dislike it when people act all intellectual and talk about Mozart when they haven’t even seen one of his paintings...
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I’m so Pentecostal, I won’t even eat pizza unless it’s been delivered.
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If you clean out a vacuum cleaner, do you not become a vacuum cleaner?
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My husband said I have no sense of direction. Made me so mad, I packed my bags and right.
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Mandatory temperature taking at the Foreigner concert.
If you are hot-blooded, they will check it and see.
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Can anyone tell me what concise means? Please be short, brief and to the point.
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Lord, Cause a spirit of generosity to fall on our nation. Help us to be kind to one another, rushing to give each other needed aid. Give us a spirit of wisdom and send your Spirit to help us discern what is right. Help us to choose love over fear. Redeem this time. Heal us, Abba.
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I predict a baby boom in about 9 months. Then 13 years later will come the rise of the quaranteens.
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Lord, let me be as familiar with the flow of your Holy Spirit as the eagles are with the currents of the wind.
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I would like to start dieting but I just have too much on my plate right now.
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Update on Otis: Limited brain activity. Family being prepped for end of life decisions. Please keep praying for him and his family. 19 is so young and suicide so heartbreaking.
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Show respect to people who wear glasses.
They paid to see you.
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Me: This show is boring.
My boss: Again, this is a Zoom conference.
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Hats should be spelled HATS because it is all caps.
Hope that didn’t go over your head.
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My boss wants me to join a 401k, but no way am I running that far.
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Could use some prayer. Ministering to women today about different kinds of abuse and it’s effects.
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Can someone tell me what 'omnipresent' means? I keep seeing it literally everywhere.
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Praise report: The abortion hasn’t happened yet. Rescheduled for Thursday. Pray with me, saints, that God will place a love in the mother’s heart for the baby and give the grandmother wisdom and power to intercede mightily for this precious life.
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Someone threw a bottle of Omega-3 at me.
I only have super fish oil injuries, but I'm lucky I wasn't krilled.
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According to my chocolate Advent calendar, only three days til Christmas!
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Hey Twitter Fam... Calling all Intercessors: 1. Please pray against a specific abortion scheduled tomorrow at 10:10am.
2. My daughter and her husband’s drug-addicted roommate has admitted to wanting to kill my son-in-law. They are moving out ASAP but please pray for protection.
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If womb is pronounced woom, and tomb is pronounced toom,
then shouldn’t bomb be pronounced boom?
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I signed up for a 401K, but I'm a bit nervous.
I've never run that far before.
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I asked my German friend if he knew the square root of 81.
He didn't know.
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The Black Eyed Peas can sing us a tune, but the chick peas can only hummus one.
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