gently used ass rag
@mastergoobway
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What’s up with movie theaters encouraging us to fuck the popcorn
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Fuck it I just don’t care anymore what’s the point
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He’s the groundhog of white boy summer
BREAKING: Chet Hanks has confirmed that there will be a white boy summer in 2024‼️
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Just got fired from the Gambling Hotline for helping this guy cook up a fucking wicked 15 leg parlay
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Top 3 duos
1. Retarded people and WWE
2. Black guys and overweight white women
3. Me and an 8 ball
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Red Wings new draft pick seems like a good guy
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How it feels to have one beer left in the fridge
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Just had a cracker hit me with a “I shit you not” I know he’s not fucking around
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Changed my body from the way god made it, it reflects my altered mind.
Changed my body from the way God made it,
It reflects my altered mind.
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Cold Beer Sunday
Cold Beer Monday
Cold Beer Tuesday
Cold Beer however you fuckin spell it
Cold Beer Thursday
Cold Beer Friday
Cold Beer Saturday
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How I’m leaving county jail after my 4th dui arrest
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Sup girl, you trynna comeback to my place? Or should I kill myself right infront of you
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Will this count towards his fantasy points?
NFL player Xavien Howard allegedly has 4 women pregnant at the same time
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You actually don’t need VR to do this guys
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I have the opportunity to do the funniest thing with my bitch of a wife
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At the end of the day aren’t we all the Alabama State Treasurer
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Last nights stats:
Beers drank:35
“Damn she’s bad”: 11
Eye contact made: 9
Women talked to: 0
Gay thoughts: 3
Pants shit: 1
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Blowing raspberries on the dead hooker I found behind a motel 6
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Me: I’d do anything for you
Her: Stop drinking Beer
Me: *shoots her 37 times*
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If anyone can guess what animal this is I’ll drink 14 Beers tonight
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My rizz is getting too drunk the first time we meet
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My bitch of a wife dragging me to another party with the in-laws
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Took the fattest shit in my hotel room. nearly grabbed it by the lip and pulled it out of the water like a Largemouth Bass
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Getting pulled over on the way home from watching Monday Night Football at the bars
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15 Beers on a Sunday will have you feeling like this
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That’s what the fuck I’m talking about
Congresswoman Lauren Boebert's Handjob/Groping Incident At The Theater Happened On a FIRST DATE
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Wasent how I expected my Friday night to end but hell yeah brother
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Neighbor said hi to my wife just great now I gotta fucking kill him
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Cold Beer Sunday
Cold Beer Monday
Cold Beer Tuesday
Cold Beer (However you fucking spell it)
Cold Beer Thursday
Cold Beer Friday
Cold Beer Saturday
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To all the young bachelors out there this is how you do it
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Imagine being retarded and watching this live…holy shit
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I get in the pussy and start talking Business Ethics
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If any white passing latina’s need a place to stay please DM me
❗🌋🇲🇽 - This is the current situation at the
#Popocat
épetl volcano in Mexico this morning.
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If you don’t got a Beer or Your Cock in your hand right now what the fuck are you doing
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This is gonna be the Denny’s Grand Slam of DUI’s
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This is nothing compared to when my drunk uncle doesn’t win anything from the scratch offs
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Writing another post about Drinking Beer and Gambling
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Delivering the news to my neighbor that I just ran over her 5 year old child
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Hunting: 15 Beers
Gathering: Catalytic Converters
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Cracking open a Ice Cold Beer when my bitch of a wife is trying to get me to sign the divorce papers
No more unpopular opinions. Tell the world something that brings you joy
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You gotta get rid of one
A. Beer
B. Grandma
C. Rock
D. Cheating
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What do you mean a possibly autistic alcoholic isn’t the type of guy you’re looking for
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Just Drank 12 Beers at the Bar, Time to Drive Home
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I let my dog maul whoever he wants
Opinions about pets/pet owners that’ll have you like this
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Whoever said white people can’t jump clearly haven’t seen those 9/11 clips
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Me and Beer Team 6 are about to Drink Two Thousand and Twenty Three beers before the clock strikes 12
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We at the Ketamine Wellness Center getting hope back
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Her: I hate you and never wanna see you again
Me:
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I jack off right into my own fucking mouth
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Back in the day I used to sling that pigskin over the mountains. Now I just get the shakes if I don’t have a Beer before 2 pm
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