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Pinned Tweet
For a cat with a weak heart you gave me so much love and happiness. I’m going to miss you so much Joey, and I’ll love you forever ❤️💛💚💙💜😞
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britain can’t operate a functioning train from london to near london, get real
🚨 NEW: Russia is now claiming Britain is responsible for the terrorist attack in Moscow
[
@Telegraph
]
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apparently ‘mild fatigue’ is an omicron symptom. i’m 30 years old - ‘mild fatigue’ is all my body knows
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i too aspire to having everything i own smell like cooking
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IF YOU’RE ADVERTISING A JOB VACANCY PLEASE PUT THE SALARY ON IT DON’T ASK APPLICANTS WHAT THEY EXPECT TO BE PAID FOR A ROLE THEY KNOW VERY LITTLE ABOUT
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reform vote doing a great job to highlight the real no go areas in the UK
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guarantee in the next 5 years there’ll be some kind of revelation about them. tax evasion? being paid off by the tories? there’ll be something
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why do all gays seem to have money to fly business class? is there some kind of bursary i’m missing out on?
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go to [horny] jail
go directly to [horny] jail
do not pass GO
do not collect £200
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Happy reimposed COVID measures I’m preparing myself for 6 months more shameless bathroom thirst pics!!!
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can we just admire the wallpaper / floor / bathroom wall / bathroom ceiling combo ?
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got ID’d in lidl (i’m 32 next week) - she took one look at me, one look at my driving license, gave me a filthy look and called her manager over
like fine im baby but also if i was 17 and trying to get served underage why would i use the ID of someone in their early 30s??!?
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when i was young, if i were ill the cat would come and sit on my lap and my mum would always be like ‘aww he knows you’re not well and has come to look after you’
i now realise the cat isn’t on me to look after me, he’s waiting for me to die so he can eat me
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6ft 2in and mostly leg
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a (very attractive) guy in the gym asked what my arm workout was and i was so flustered i just said ‘weights’ i am so embarrassed im hiding
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if this is dad bod then im a fukin hippo
If you didn’t want me at my twink bod, you don’t deserve me at my dad bod
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