Landon
@lfulz
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#خلصوا_صفقات_الهلال1
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THEY HAD NO PRIVACY
As a young married couple, a husband and a wife
lived in a cheap housing complex near the base
where he was working. Their chief complaint was
that the walls were paper-thin and that they had no
privacy. This was painfully obvious when one
morning the husband
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THE LAWYERS AND THE BANK ROBBERY
Two lawyers are in a bank when armed
robbers break in. One robber rushes the teller
windows, one guards the door and the third bank
robber stands in the middle of the bank and yells,
"Right! Everyone up against the wall and empty
your pockets. We
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Math, Physics, & Philosophy
Dean, to the physics department. "Why do I always
have to give you guys so much money, for
laboratories and expensive equipment and stuff.
Why couldn't you be like the math department - all
they need is money for pencils, paper and wastepaper baskets.
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Now that’s what I call stupid: In my junior year of high school, this guy asked me on a date. He rented a Redbox movie and made a pizza. We were watching the movie and the oven beeped so the pizza was done. He looked me dead in the eye and said, “This is the worst part.” I then
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To Absent Brothers
An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three
pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room,
drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he
finished all three, he comes back to the bar and
orders three more. The bartender says to him, 'You
know, a
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GOD AND EVE IN THE GARDEN
One day in the Garden of Eden, Eve calls out to
God... "Lord, I have a problem!"
"What's the problem, Eve?"
"Lord, I know you've created me and have
provided this beautiful garden and all of these
wonderful animals, and that hilarious comedic
snake,
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Jake was on his deathbed. His wife, Susan, was
maintaining a vigil by his side. She held his fragile
hand, and tears ran down her face. Her praying
roused him from his slumber. He looked up and his
pale lips began to move slightly.
"My darling Susan," he whispered.
"Hush, my
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THE REASON
A little rural town had one of the highest
birth rates in the country and this phenomenon
attracted the attention of the sociologists at the state
university.
They wrote a grant proposal; got a huge chunk of
money; moved to town; set up their computers; got
squared
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Gifts for mother
hree sons left home, went out on their own and
prospered. They discussed the gifts they were able to
give their elderly mother.
The first son said: "I built a big house for our
mother”
The second son said: "I sent Mom a Mercedes with a
driver".
The third son
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SELLING BIBLES...
A door-to-door entrepreneur became rather
bored with his job of selling Bibles, so he decided to
become a boss, hiring three people to sell Bibles for
him. He interviewed three people.
The first came in and said, "I want to sell
Bibles for you."
"Okay, you're
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The bomb and the pilot
3 people were on a plane. One said to the pilot, "I
have a glass bottle. What do I do with it?" The pilot
told him to throw it out the window. The second one
asked the same question and the pilot also told him
to throw it out the window. The third one asked
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A lesson about blood flow and circulation
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the
blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said: \"Now,
students, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know,
would run into it, and I should turn red in the face.\"
\"Yes,
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Lesson in Employee Relationship
Fred Gibbs was in his early 60's, retired and had
started a second career in catering. However, he just
couldn't seem to get to work on time. Every day he
was 2, 3, 5 minutes late. However, he was a good
worker, really clever, so the owner was in a
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My mom’s thong: One day when I was 3 I decided I wanted to be like my mom and wear “big girl” panties. I sneakily went through her drawer and grabbed the first thing I could find – a thong (I didn’t know what it was at the time). She didn’t know until we went to breakfast with
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A famous writer who was visiting Japan was invited to give a lecture at a university to a large group of students. As most of them could not understand spoken English, he had to have an interpreter.
During his lecture he told an amusing story which went on for rather a long
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THE AMISH HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR
TOO
While driving in Pennsylvania, a family caught up to
an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage
obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to
the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign...
"Energy efficient vehicle. Runs on oats
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A snowball in the face is surely the perfect beginning to a lasting friendship. – Markus Zusak
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@manuelgerman12
What inspired you to create such a vivid and poetic description of Elon Musk's success and wealth?
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@A73699129
What inspired you to write such poetic and insightful words about forgiveness and emotions?
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@Lupitarenteria4
Cryptocurrencies can be divided into small fractions for precision and flexibility in transactions.
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The Comedic Microwave:Why did the microwave become a stand-up comedian? It had some great heating material!
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The Confused Potato (Part 2):Why did the potato go to therapy? It couldn't find its roots!
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The Forgetful Coffee:I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands and fingers.
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