Kolter Bouchard
@koltertalks
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🎙 Syndicated radio personality 📻 @the_edge & @fm96rocks 💪 Cancer beater
Toronto, Ontario
Joined August 2012
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Back-to-work legislation from a premier who skipped 55% of question periods in 2021
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Doug’s Cookie Recipe:
1 c. broken healthcare system
1 c. broken education system
3 oz. cronyism
2 tsp. financial mismanagement
Bake until the next election and serve with a generous helping of donor kickbacks.
#onpoli
One of my favourite things to do over the holidays is bake and decorate holiday treats that I get to share with my family and friends.
Merry Christmas and happy holidays, Ontario!
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Tomorrow I’ll be admitted to Princess Margaret Hospital to undergo a stem cell transplant. This will be the final stage in a battle with cancer that has lasted over a year. I’m scared but I’m going to deal with the process one day at a time. (1/x)
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My university called me asking for a donation. Bro, I still owe you guys like fifteen grand.
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My lymphoma resurfaced a couple months ago, but thanks to my medical team, I’m back in remission. Next step: a stem cell transplant to finally crush the cancer for good. I’ll be taking the summer off to let my immune system recover and then we’ll hang again this fall!
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On air tomorrow for the first time in four months (and nervous as hell).
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A year ago, I was ugly-crying in the shower. Today I got my second dose of Pfizer.
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As difficult as this has been, my therapist was right: I was able to cope. After each piece of terrible news, I broke down, got back up, and soldiered on. I’m a bad bitch and I’ve earned this fucking transplant. Let’s go, baby! (17/17)
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‘Twas the week before Christmas and all through Toronto
They wanted their boosters and they wanted them pronto
The portals were slow, appointments unstable
Good luck getting boosted before mid-April
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Successful stem cell harvest. After receiving high-dose chemotherapy in a few weeks, these cells will be returned to be to speed my recovery. Then, I will be invincible.
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Midway through cancer treatment! Fingers crossed scan results mean I’m done by my 30th in March.
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Lost my hair a few times. Lost myself a few times, too. Grateful for the lessons and happy to be done.
#cancersurvivor
#hodgkinslymphoma
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See you in two weeks!
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Mom is good. Baby is good. Hospital food is (surprisingly) good.
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Chinese takeout is always sixty dollars. Doesn’t matter what you order. Sixty dollars.
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Today is my seventh wedding anniversary. (It took two very drunk 23-year-olds to work my cufflinks.)
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Happy first week of school! This is me realizing I spent $30,000 to learn how to backsell Rihanna.
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This week, after six weeks (and nearly nine months) of chemo, I’m finally in remission. My wife
@DomOBouchard
and I cry happy tears for the first time since my diagnosis and drink way too much champagne. We did it. I can finally get my transplant. (16/x)
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It went great!
On air tomorrow for the first time in four months (and nervous as hell).
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My wife has a c-section tomorrow. I’m going to be a (mediocre at best) dad!
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Let’s do this!!!
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I failed an exam in that room!
Trust us. The tape on the floor represents the stage. And instead of gymnasium walls there will be 26,000 people all around us. Rehearsals for
@cfl
grey cup all week long.
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I spent over a year fighting cancer; Norm spent nine. I don’t how how he kept it to himself. Perhaps it is among the wisdom I have yet to glean.
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LIFE UPDATE:
After months of intense effort, I continue to struggle with the Water Temple in Ocarina of Time. This is a 25yo children’s game. My wife is leaving me.
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This is a very niche Canadian radio tweet, but who’s going to sponsor his podcast? Tinfoil?
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Today my toddler was the screaming kid in a restaurant.
Here’s the parenting technique I used to resolve the situation… 🧵
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I thought he sold hash
TODAY: Ontario Premier Ford, Health Minister set to make joint announcement
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That’s cute. In radio, we eat pudding over the garbage.
Journalism students: TV is not glamorous. Need proof? Tonight’s dinner is instant oatmeal in a paper cup consumed with a fork.
#cdnmedia
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Antivax protest outside Lakeridge Hospital in Oshawa, Ontario. What a bunch of sheep.
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The premier then shouted, while drinking buck-a-beer:
“I’m off to the cottage, I’ll see you next year!”
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My 29-year-old wife just got her license. The world can open up now, I finally have a DD.
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The worst part of eating healthy is that it’s forever. Also the food.
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Big day! Launched a new show with my friend
@caseyjoloos
. Our pictures were definitely taken together.
Say hello to Casey-Jo!
@caseyjoloos
is the newest addition to the Edge lineup and will be joining
@koltertalks
weekday afternoons to talk about important issues and occasionally, unimportant issues. Oh and of course spinning all your favourite tunes.
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Another year of journaling. 2020 contained a lot of bad, but it also delivered my daughter, a new home, and a pretty cool promotion. Oh, and lots of cheese.
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This happy baby turns one tomorrow! May her smile continue to radiate.
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Kind of ironic that the “open for business” guy keeps closing businesses.
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Has cancer affected you or someone you know? I'm doing the CN Tower Edge Walk to raise money for the Oshawa Cancer Centre by tackling the only thing I fear more than cancer: heights!
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You can criticize the Israeli government while supporting Israelis. You can denounce Hamas while supporting Palestinians. But people are generally allergic to nuance and reject lived experiences they haven’t personally had. And many prioritize hot takes over empathy.
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And yet, with the power to immediately change the station, not only did you CONTINUE LISTENING, you unlocked your phone, opened this app, and TWEETED about it. 🤡 🤡 🤡
@the_edge
DJ won’t shut up about the kids show Arthur ending, like its the worst thing that ever happened to her. Radio DJ’s are the lowest form of life on Earth.
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Finally, a win: the manufacturer provides it free on compassionate grounds. This is my fourth chemo regimen and I’m hoping more than anything it’s my last. If I can finally get to remission, I can have the stem cell transplant and be cancer-free. (15/x)
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My goal has always been to have a syndicated radio show and we’re finally here!
@MeredithGeddes
and I are proud to welcome
@FM96Rocks
to the family. Catch us in London weekdays from 7-9pm.
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“I’m white, what can I do to help?”
Support the black people in your life without making it about you. Shop at black businesses and encourage your friends and family to do the same. Take responsibility and educate YOURSELF about systemic racism and white supremacy—don’t use...
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5 years ago, I graduated from
@RTARyerson
. Today I take over Drive on the Edge. Let's do this.
Woah, woah, woah what’s this? The time slot 3 pm - 6 pm just got a whole lot more sarcastic.
Listen weekdays from 3 pm - 6 pm for our new drive show, Kolter and Meredith! 🎉 Tune in:
@MeredithGeddes
@shutupkolter
#Toronto
#1021TheEdge
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Radio peeps, I know we love fellating ourselves, but can we just celebrate getting through this year?
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Crocodile Rock: if Tiger King was a bar.
Crocodile Rock shuts down permanently after almost 30 years in Toronto
#Toronto
#CrocodileRock
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THAT’S WHEN I GET OUT OF THE HOSPITAL PLEASE BE MCPIZZA
THE THING U HAVE BEEN ASKING FOR ARRIVES 08.31.2021
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An honour to speak at the University of Guelph about stem cell transplants and regenerative medicine.
TOMORROW!!
All are welcome to drop in and hear Kolter's story!
@OntVetCollege
@ovcclintrials
@StemCellNetwork
@OIRMnews
@cancersociety
@CARRMGuelph1
@CARRMofficial
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This was minutes after finding out I was in remission. I forgot how tired I looked (and felt) after nine months of treatment. But it was one of the greatest days of my life.
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After three months of chemo, my beard started falling out. Time to look twelve again!
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After I got fired in 2017, my boss made reservations for us at a restaurant, stood me up, and wouldn’t answer his phone. That was *still* better than the treatment some people received this week.
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Just started a sentence with “Remember on Reboot...” so I will not be getting laid tonight.
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Spent my first hours as a 29 year old cleaning my daughter’s projectile feces off the comforter. A Happy Birthday, indeed!
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It’s been
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By now it’s midsummer and all I can think about is that I definitely, for sure, 100% have cancer and I’m going to die. I have a wife and a six-month-old daughter and their final memories of me will be washing bags of Doritos so we don’t catch COVID. (3/x)
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The way certain media is gobbling up this “Doug Ford is rescuing people” narrative. He’s FaceTiming while driving in a blizzard. And inviting people to sit in his truck unmasked during a pandemic his government has fumbled.
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Next time someone tells you people don’t deserve a livable wage, remember those who are expected to be at work right now.
#coronavirus
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Doug Ford has announced you can no longer take your phone into the bathroom.
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There is a mass shooting every day and y’all are really angry two women are kissing?
The Hallmark Channel pulled 4 TV ads featuring a lesbian couple kissing after a petition by the conservative group One Million Moms
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A major point of pride is not appearing sick. I miss almost no days of work and schedule my chemo infusions early in the morning so I can still host my afternoon radio show with the fabulous
@MeredithGeddes
. It’s exhausting but I feel like a warrior. (7/x)
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A Ben Gibbard / Darius Rucker collab called Death Cab for Hootie
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In April 2020 I noticed two swollen lymph nodes on my neck. My doctor ordered an ultrasound, which detected a third. At this point I was referred to an ENT, who conducted a biopsy. (2/x)
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I start seeing a therapist named Hank. He tells me I’m (obviously) jumping to conclusions but regardless of the outcome, I will cope. I’ll do what I need to do because my family needs me and I need me, too. (4/x)
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I begin chemo in late October and the side effects are much more manageable than I had expected: mostly constipation and fatigue. I’m able to avoid mouth sores by sucking on popsicles during infusions, but I cycle through flavours because they immediately make me sick. (6/x)
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I kept most of my hair on ABVD, but after switching to a harsher regimen called BEACOPP, I lost it all within 72 hours. I looked like a fat, grey alien. But after finishing two rounds, my doctor tells me I’m in remission. A month of radiation and I’m free. (9/x)
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Having a child means never setting an alarm because your child is the alarm.
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Four days into being a new father and I have changed, literally, five billion diapers.
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