Jim Daly 🏳️⚧️🏳️🌈
@jimdalycomedy
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Comedian, actor, presenter and tired father. Represented by @q_t_management | Pick Of The Edinburgh Fringe 2022 ⭐⭐⭐⭐
London, England
Joined September 2010
When your friend Manuel tries to give you a hug.
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Why does Thiago Alcantara look like he's just won the US Open after defeating Novak Djokovic in straight sets?.
Liverpool are reportedly 'very likely' to sign Thiago Alcantara. All the latest gossip:
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"Hi Peter, can you just give us a nice touching tribute on what Laurie Cunningham meant to you please". "Sure, no worries. "
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No Champions League.Until 2022.
Let's see who's got the best #ValentinesDay rhymes 💙. Roses are red,.Manchester is blue,.__________.__________
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My genuine joy at us being in the final only tempered by Gary Neville now giving major credit to Gareth Southgate who, frankly, has bumbled through this tournament with a terrific squad that he has hopelessly mismanaged.
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At Dulwich v Palace and the most non-league thing just happened. The guy over the tannoy read the registration of a car that was being towed. The Dulwich keeper suddenly started frantically calling to someone in the crowd. It's his car.
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Barman in Nashville: Who's your team?. Me: Crystal Palace. B: Where they from?. M: Croydon. B: What state is that in?. M: Not great, to be honest.
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If Leicester do get relegated, is Gary Lineker going to do MOTD wearing every single piece of clothing he owns, like Joey in Friends?.
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You can't say Palace fans aren't committed, still booing Ashley Young for a dive against them five and a half years ago. That commitment to grudges is impressive. #CRYMUN.
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Hurling rules are wild. Pull your opponents shirt; free kick and a stern talking to. Smack someone on the head with the hurley stick; absolutely fine, play on.
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Wife: "What are you doing today?". Me: "Going to Selhurst.". Wife: "Who's playing?". Me: "Palace - Toulouse.". Wife: "Sounds about right.".
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✅First ever win at the Etihad.✅Only league team to win at the Etihad.✅First ever win at the Emirates.✅Earliest ever safe in the PL.✅FA Cup quarter-final.✅Goal of the season.✅Eight points above Brighton. But apparently it's been a boring season. 🤔 . #cpfc.
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Probably the only Palace fan celebrating this weekend as this little squidge entered our lives. Maria Violet Dawe-Daly, born September 21st at 6.58pm which actually probably automatically makes her more of an Earth, Wind and Fire fan than anything. Also the NHS is amazing.
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This was the scheduling issue. Baby boy arrived on Wednesday morning. Mum had some complications so we had to stay in a few days. She was amazing, I mostly ate snacks. All the maternity staff were incredible. God bless the NHS🌈❤
Due to a clash in schedules, there isn’t a main podcast this week. Apologies for this, it was an unavoidable issue.
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A small provincial town has a string of suspicious murders. A rogue detective is brought in to try to solve them. Kieran Tompsett stars in 'Parting Gift'. BBC1, airing January 2023.
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This country is a mess. We had a chance this week to listen, to learn, to grow and to actually make a change for the better and we completely fucked it.
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Gary O'Neil having GO instead of GON on his top is making me irrationally angry. @FootballCliches
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Where's the 'stop Nigel Farage appearing on TV' option?.
In our ad break @Nigel_Farage came up with a poll and he wants to know what would you vote for next week? #Peston.
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⚠️New job alert⚠️. Delighted to have been appointed General Manager at AFC Fylde. Can't wait to work in an exciting job but also finally get that work life balance right and be able to pick the kids up from school Wednesdays and Fridays.
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A young Palace fan just scored a penalty in the half-time kids shootout at Selhurst and ran to celebrate in front of the Man City fans, Adebayor style. That's the best moment of the season so far. #cpfc.
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Wayne Hennessey's mind is going to explode when he finds out what the minutes silence was for today. #CRYLEI.
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Let me tell you a story of how yesterday was probably the best day of my life. .
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Eddie Howe: "You don't want to see any team cheating intentionally.". You're right, Eddie, no-one wants to see that.
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Still not convinced Arsene Wenger is actually a man and not three kids in an overcoat. http://t.co/RZ7yzHulZ7.
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My wife: Why is there a man on the sidelines making them look at carpet samples?
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Don't want to take all the credit but Palace are unbeaten since my daughter was born. You're welcome, everyone. #cpfc.
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It's actually impossible to dislike Ole Gunnar Solskjaer, and that's quite impressive considering he's the manager of Manchester United.
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Dear everyone,. Now you know what it's like watching Palace. Yours,. Palace fans.
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My mum bought my wife these slippers at Christmas, she's only just put them on and I've realised they look like the Coronavirus.
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It would the most British thing ever if the thing that finally takes down the Tory party is Match of the Day.
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I've come to this wedding in Scotland dressed like a League Two manager under pressure.
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Thank god we're back to hating Piers Morgan. That brief few months in 2020 where he was bearable was frankly unbearable.
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Backgammon.
Brexit Party MEPs turn their backs in European Anthem at opening session of European Parliament
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Not a mobile phone in sight. Just fans living in the moment. And proof that safe standing works.
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Shilton: Brexit won, get over it. Also Shilton: Maradona cheated 34 years ago.
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Alex Hunter is an evil robot on Doctor Who. This is what happened if you answered fiery to every post match question.
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Imagine still being anti-Southgate at this point. The guy is England's best manager since Alf Ramsey. Has revolutionised the national team and is a gent while doing it. National treasure.
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Funny how James Ward-Prowse rhymes with Little Shithouse.
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I wanted a blockbuster guest for episode 500 and not only did Roy deliver, he said some very nice things about the podcast I started 15 years ago and presented me with that signed shirt. Every bit the gent you'd expect. Please do give it a listen 🎧.
🚨FYP POD 500!🚨. To celebrate hitting 500 episodes we are joined by Palace manager Roy Hodgson! He chats:. Watching Palace as a kid👶.Coaching abroad✈️.Returning to CPFC🦅.Wilf Zaha🔥.Ray's Shorts🩳.And more💬. Listen here👉 #cpfc #FYPPodcast #RoyHodgson
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Just your hourly reminder that Brighton have never beaten Crystal Palace in the Premier League. #cpfc.
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Not saying The Journey on #FIFA17 is flawed but I scored 1 goal in 20 in the Championship then got recalled and started ahead of Harry Kane.
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Don't I already pay tax on all those things?.
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Just realised George Osborne looks like future Adam Johnson trying to forget where it all went wrong.
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Imagine being so damn patriotic you're prepared to break into your own national team's stadium, trash it after the game and racially abuse your own players. Absolutely braindead.
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It's very Palace that we only have two fit strikers at the club and one of them is the Sporting Director. #cpfc.
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Gov: Hey everyone, have a free meal during lockdown on us. Poor child: Can I have a free meal?. Gov: Fuck off.
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Really heartwarming that whether you're Southgate Out or Southgate In after last night we can all unite with the common goal of hating Sam Matterface.
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The #WhenEaglesDare documentary is absolutely fantastic although I'm not sure about Dougie Freedman's maths.
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But Pep has actually improved Sterling?.
Michael Gove tells @LBC: "The Prime Minister is a born winner. Boris is the Pep Guardiola of British politics.".
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Me at 7am: Oliver Glasner? Never heard of him. Me at 9am: I want us to appoint Oliver Glasner more than anything in the world.
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When you applied for a laugh but actually got the job.
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Missed the Trump protests in London because I am in New York so I did my own one-man protest instead.
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Still unbeaten.
Don't want to take all the credit but Palace are unbeaten since my daughter was born. You're welcome, everyone. #cpfc.
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No shade to anyone involved but this is objectively the funniest football twitter interaction ever.
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This is my dad. I love him because he's kind and generous. I love him because he's supportive and always has my back. I love him because he made me a Crystal Palace fan. But most of all I love him because he fucking hates the Tories.
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Really sad Hodgson's second spell is ending like this, given everything he's done for Palace over the past five years, and the sort of gent he is. His legacy will still be keeping Palace in the Premier League for five seasons which probably won't be beaten for a while.
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RT if you think Snodgrass is a diving shitbag. Like if you think Snodgrass is a cheating little douchcanoe.
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Yes it was a great win over Burnley today but highlight was Roy addressing me by my first name in the post-match interviews. We're basically bezzies now.
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Sending love to Big Kevin Campbell, one of the nicest footballers I've ever met, who is seriously unwell. Keep fighting, big man 💪♥️
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Started with a win, ended with a win. We won't talk about the 20 years in between. 🏆@the_remf
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There's a 22 man brawl in the PSG - Dortmund game. Literally everyone in the stadium is fighting.
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Club appealing for Chelsea racists to be identified. Shouldn't be too difficult. he wears the captain's armband and plays in defence.
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Breaking News: Jonathan linked with a move to Crystal Palace.
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It's my dad's 70th birthday today. He's the reason I'm a Palace fan and the best bit of every home game is having a tea and a chat with him.
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Married the greatest person I know in front of all my amazing friends and family. Best. Day. Ever. ❤
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I found the ticket from my first ever football match. What was yours?
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Ok at what point do we start prosecuting Katie Hopkins for inciting racial hatred? We can't keep normalising her behaviour surely.
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Palace currently have more ITK accounts than players.
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