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@je_mc2
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Coincidences are God's way of remaining anonymous - Albert Einstein. Fairly serious amateur runner.
Joined June 2009
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Pinned Tweet
Nigerians in London are buying yam at 2,600 for one. Nigerians in Nigeria are buying for 4,000 and above.
Nigeria we hail thee.
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Earlier today, I had dropped my wife at Surulere after we'd checked on a friend together.
Returned home to a locked gate: the keys were in her bag, far away.
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Arewa Twitter won't see this one. But once Rahama Sadau shows the skin on her back, Allah's Assistants come out.
Kaduna loses 124 children to malnutrition in 9 months
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Kogi is a strategic state. It is the only state in Nigeria that borders TEN states (Ekiti, Kwara, Abuja, Nasarawa, Niger, Edo, Ondo, Anambra, Enugu and Benue). An active ISIS cell there is calamitous for Nigeria's internal security.
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Or I could have decided not to get her favourite snacks, even though she also had a long day.
I made the same choice I always make though.
There should be no room for wickedness or being vindictive in marriage.
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That he doesn't know anything about PR.
A new NDLEA boss is appointed then suddenly drug busts everywhere...what does this say of the predecessor?
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GEJ's administration was buried by the Chibok abduction. However, Buhari, elected on a security platform, has had multiple Chiboks, and is just coasting through.
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Less than 6 weeks to the elections and Nigeria has many fuel queues, while the ruling party campaigns on 'renewed hope'.
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If a Christian businessman living in Sokoto did this with an Imam's garb, he and his business would surely be past tense in 48 hours.
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The time Piggy and BuyCoins will use to do real innovation, they will use that to dodge Emefiele. I'm sure many of them haven't slept much over the last 72 hours.
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Will Smith didn't slap Chris Rock because he had made jokes about Will and Jada in the past or because Will himself was 'on the edge'.
He slapped Chris Rock because he could safely do it without repercussions.
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If you have to resort to videos older than the average Nigerian to push a candidate, it means that candidate's best days are well behind him.
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If you are married to someone with a PhD in...Actuarial Science (!), how many people do you know personally who could realistically be smarter?
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The VAR check is complete. The slap of the year was delivered by Bianca Ojukwu on behalf of all the people of Anambra State. Thank you for your service. The streets won't forget.
Congratulations to Ndi Anambra worldwide!
H/T:
@kena_ewuru
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FAAN moving to remove the speck in its neighbours' eye (by shutting down KFC in MMIA), while ignoring the log in its own eye (its out-of-service elevators) is the most Nigerian government thing ever.
PRESS RELEASE
March 28, 2024
FAAN SHUTS DOWN KFC OUTLET AT MMIA
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I've been in her life for more than 5yrs and yet she thought my love and gentleness towards her would change simply because of a harmless mistake.
I suppose I could have shouted at her on the phone and ordered her to start rushing home.
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Ali Modu Sheriff empowered fanatics and couldn't control them. He left office in 2011 and inside 10 years, Zulum cannot move freely.
Supporters of Hisbah, take note.
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Someone didn't commit a crime and was not charged, but is now being 'bailed'. Is life in Nigeria not amazing?
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Yeah. This is how you know he (and they) will fail. Once you frame the problem wrong, that's really the end.
CBN Governor, Yemi Cardoso, Blames Forex (Naira) Woes on Growing Number of Nigerians Studying Abroad.
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"I can't believe you got me stuff when I left you stranded. How can you stay calm and even have the heart to get me anything when I was worried you'd be furious?"
And I realized it wasn't a big deal but she thinks it is.
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Please note: The stealing that Funso Doherty has drawn attention to, is for ONLY TWO QUARTERS IN A YEAR. It's not for 1 year. It's not for 4 years. It's not for 8 years. It's not since 1999.
Read this and multiply it by 1,000. Then you can come close to appreciating the waste.
I just wrote an open letter to the Governor on Public Procurement awards reported by LASG for the 2nd and 3rd quarters of 2023, highlighting a number of issues for further scrutiny and remedial action. Judicious use of public funds is always important, and is especially so now.
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El-Rufai's comments make the 'leave religion out of politics' people look extremely foolish.
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Delayed gratification is rendered meaningless in a country with high inflation.
The future you're waiting for is gone by the time you get there.
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You are given food to distribute to your constituency who are hungry. You hold on to some to distribute on your birthday. You have the nerve to actually say it.
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Loudly advertising a protest with almost 2 weeks' notice often means you're looking for a deal with the authorities.
Very few effective protests are advertised like this.
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Nigeria doesn't deserve what Femco and those affiliated with them did during EndSars.
The cost is too high.
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I was furious but there was really nothing I could do. Luckily, I was with my laptop so went to an eatery and worked for about 4hrs, until she returned.
I gave her the snacks when I got into the house and her jaw dropped.
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That you have a favourite Nigerian politician in the first place means you need your head examined.
lmaooooo, one day Dan Bello will troll your favorite politician and i hope you will maintain the same level of “LMFAOOOOO & 😂😂😂😂😂😂”
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Danladi Umar referring to 'Biafra Boys' assaulting him after he assaulted a guard.
Acting IG Usman Baba giving approval for human rights violations in Operation Restore Peace in the SE.
AGF Malami putting spare parts dealers on the same level with herdsmen.
A straight line.
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Nigeria's sporting teams will soon be made up - mostly or wholly - of people who never had any interaction with Nigeria. And they will be better physically and technically.
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I'm inclined to agree. But more to the point, it's the kind of greed that explains why Lagos hasn't gone anywhere in 25 years.
I don't think that document verification thing would have received much scrutiny if they had set the fee at 50k, or even 100k. They would have gotten away with it. Smh.
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The fact that a white person apparently buys in 100% with Nigerian culture is cute, maybe worthy of a passing mention or a few RTs, but cannot be a basis for appointments. Let's be more serious this year, please.
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One position I've had that has only hardened over the last 10 years is this: There is no substitute for state capacity. No amount of individuals with money and/or connections can replace a functioning state that knows (and does) its job. There's no reasonable counterargument.
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Lucy's exit is by far the best exit of any BBN housemate. Sweet die. 😂😂😂😂
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Fascinating to see PDP people going on and on about two main narratives:
1. A vote for LP will enable APC return
2. The 'best' route to an SE presidency is for Atiku to win
The horse has left that particular stable, folks. It left over 3 months ago. You're talking to yourselves
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1,000,000 NGOs can never replace a single functional government.
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Nigeria: a society obsessed with childbearing, but one whose collective decisions does not reflect a love for children.
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On June 27th, it will be THIRTY YEARS since Catholics all over Nigeria began saying the 'Prayer for Nigeria in distress'.
Only to see the distress increase.
It doesn't work, folks. Sorry. Prayer can't cover the kind of nonsense we do here.
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Pantami destroyed telecoms' growth by two-thirds overnight, with just ONE policy.
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A politician who cannot publicly account for half his life has a decent chance of becoming Nigeria's next president.
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This is one instance of what may be more widespread in Kano. Thank you Muritala Adewale and
@GuardianNigeria
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Like I have said on Twitter over 6 times over the years:
1,000,000 NGOs can never, ever, ever replace one functional government.
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Street lights? They can't do.
Roads? Who sai?
Waste management? NEVER.
Provide water? Nope.
Lagos State has not solved ONE SINGLE PROBLEM in 20+ years.
There is always money for SUVs and 'consultancy' though.
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'Social media doesn't matter', but they come and post training videos for Tour De France on social media as proof of life.
I carry yansh for una.
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Getting fake pastors for an 'unveiling' of a Muslim - Muslim ticket when real Catholic priests are being killed daily, with nary a peep from any of them. Sick.
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If inflation in your country is 30% and the interest rate is 18.75%, money can't enter your economy. No be curse.
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See how Thailand fought for the lives of children of 'nobodies'. Spared no expense. Their parents will be so grateful and can be patriotic with their chest, knowing their government stands up for them.
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Update on Nigeria's kidnap industry (H1 2021):
₦10 billion in ransoms
2,371 people kidnapped
281 incidents of kidnap
237 lives lost during those kidnaps
Niger, Zamfara, Kaduna and Katsina the worst hit.
This is our country now.
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People are still calling what is happening a 'protest'. That's nonsense talk. It hasn't been a protest for nearly 48 hours. Protesters are home, in hospital, or dead.
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First Zamfara now Sokoto. Schools, markets, highways, closed. Northern Nigeria is shutting down under a Northern president and security establishment due to insecurity.
Is there any failure more catastrophic than this?
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Nigerians need to know that as at this moment, there's no Environmental Impact Assessment (EIA) for the proposed Lagos - Calabar coastal road.
However, demolitions costing businesses huge sums have already occurred.
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The next time someone on this website says that only people who are purportedly very educated should vote, show that person this tweet.
Immediately, the Lagos state government renovated Gbagada General Hospital and dropped prices to increase access to maternity care for the poor. The middle-class people moved there and suffocated the poor out of the facility.
The car park is always filled with exotic cars, but
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Pa Reuben Fasoranti is stepping down as Afenifere leader at 95 because 'time is not on his side'.
He has handed over to Ayo Adeabanjo. Chief Adebanjo is 93 next month.
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Even our U-20s are abandoned. I'm heartbroken. This is Nigeria. This is what we have become.
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Apart from stopping the repeal of this VAPP Act, this legislator's seat should be targeted in the next election. There must be a political cost for this kind of nonsense.
Senator Jibrin Isah, representing Kogi East, is pushing to repeal the Violence Against Persons Prohibition (VAPP) Act, claiming that the definition of consent needs further differentiation. The repeal bill has now passed its second reading.
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Between the late Ibrahim Attahiru and the new CoAS, there are TWENTY FIVE senior military officers in terms of seniority.
The fact that none of them were deemed good enough is incredible.
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The fact that you don't like someone doesn't make her a prostitute or kept woman. I'm really tired of this constant innuendo. This 'mean guy' nonsense is totally unacceptable.
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Those who relocated their families with stolen government funds are mocking those who relocated with their hard earned money.
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Obaseki cleared Oshio's pensions backlog and started paying new pensioners.
I know because my MIL is one of them.
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Ogbeni
@Adheydayor
just reminded me that a whole CBN doesn't have audited accounts for the last 4 years. Who will call EFCC for them?
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Nigeria is one of those countries where citizens are faceless.
Census? Not done
Births? Deaths? Not recorded
Perpetrators and victims of violence? Faceless and nameless.
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Me, I owe my parents. I owe them a lot. They really invested in me and my siblings.
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It doesn't matter how much you spend on transfers. If you can't give the players coaching like this, they won't improve.
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The kidnappings on Lagos-Ibadan are another example of the fact that insecurity anywhere is insecurity everywhere.
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Northern governors who stay in Abuja 75% of the time, are 'disagreeing' with the disbandment of SARS.
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A Nigerian becomes African Footballer of the Year for the first time since 1999 on the same day as a nationwide grid collapse.
It doesn't get more Nigerian than this: Individual excellence side by side with utter collective failure.
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A huge problem Nigeria has which is often overlooked is good teachers for primary and secondary schools across the country. It's one of the biggest human resources gaps that gets very little coverage.
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Just in case you were still in doubt, there was no governorship primary in Lagos today.
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I don't know about anyone else, but this 'X African leader is a western puppet' business doesn't really land with me.
African leaders are perfectly capable of pauperising their citizens without the help of any external interest.
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Edakun, please follow and patronize my wife's business.
@platinumplus411
will handle all your curtains, beddings, wallpaper, painting and furniture matters. She knows the work. Help me become a househusband in 2019. RT for awareness! ☺️
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The sheer number of Terdoh's crimes means every single close friend of his over the last 10 years must be viewed with suspicion.
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For the avoidance of doubt: the higher the percentage of people engaged in agriculture in a given country, the poorer that country tends to be.
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It is a straight line from making excuses for bad leadership in the workplace, to supporting 'strongman' political leaders who can 'get things done'.
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The fantastic irony of 'laptop boys' sealing a huge deal in the middle of nationwide protests against killer cops who harass and extort 'laptop boys'.
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The presidential candidate of Nigeria's ruling party is hiding from public scrutiny. Hiding like a small, insignificant, nobody.
Nigeria does not need an individual like this as president.
Vote wisely in 2023.
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A governor seen on camera collecting bribes has now removed a traditional ruler for 'disrespect to the governor and other government agencies'. This is peak Nigeria.
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These sick people have spent over THREE YEARS to do a 5km road from Unilag main gate to Diya. It's only 50% done.
But there is 20 billion Naira for 'consultancy'. Utterly sick.
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That's how Pastor Bolaji Idowu of Harvesters platformed a full-blown election rigger. 😂😂😂😂
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Why is the deleted tweet by Atiku and the silence from others a problem?
Well, whoever becomes president has to confront EXTREMISM. Confronting that extremism means you must have spine. If a regular tweet cannot even stay up, what hope is there?
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People just carry big titles and parade the street. Not one single sense.
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I just learnt that only 14% of those who complete Junior Secondary make it to Senior Secondary. This is a catastrophe.
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Frankly, I'll be pleasantly surprised if Osun's new governor ends up a success. But by God, this baseless arrogance by compound failures must be punished. It must end.
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You cannot say a woman should "build with her man" and then when she is rightly entitled to half his net worth in a divorce, you then say: "no pussy is worth that much". Pick a struggle. Don't be stupid.
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