What if Spam was like every electronic product with a white shell back in the 80s/90s and he just started yellowing to hell and back after two-plus decades
I am going insane over the fact that the unreleased "Spamton battle forgotten" track in the new blog post sounds like a song that could've come from an old flash game like Papa's Pizzeria. It's so bad and love it so much.
I still love that a big trait of Spamton is that he literally can't create anything new and original (in-universe and character meta side). He sees anything remotely successful and he just produces a worse version of it. Even his painted mural in his shop is likely a ripoff.
What if Spamton never had anything horrible happen to him that disfigured him like acid or Gaster curse shit but instead he just looks fucked up because he spent a quadrillion dollars on really awful plastic surgery when he was still rich.
Spamton casually strolling through the city and to the Queen's mansion after he sold a weapon of mass destruction to a couple of greasy-haired teenagers
I assume the Spamton plush sewing pattern is already well documented but if it isn't someone should sacrifice one and disassemble it so they can then copy and enlarge the pattern to a disturbingly large degree. Like I'm talking a Spam plush that’s 2-3 meters tall.
Why did they make him carnivorous in this single piece of official artwork and then never again? This creature looks like it would gnaw on your arm like a Snickers bar
People always joke that Spamton A. was trying to flee the IRS after being framed by Spamton G. at the end of the video but now there's a good chance that He was ALSO fleeing the FBI/U.S. Department of Defense as well
Spamton when he learns that trying to manipulate two greasy-haired teenagers into doing his dirty work for him won't magically solve all his problems and may in fact turn around and bite him in the ass
*Fun gang is in a cooking show segment or some crap in the middle of chapter three*
*hears rustling sounds; Spamton pops out*
“HEY EVERY !! IT'S ME!!! EV3RY BUDDY 'S FAVORITE [[Number 1-”
“What? No. Spamton, your section is long over. Go away.”
“Oh. Okay.”
*fades away*
I just thought of something. Why the HELL hasn't Fangamer or Tobert Fawks released a Spamton bobblehead!?! They wouldn't have to change a single thing with his design because he is already perfectly proportioned for it. IT’S SUCH A NO-BRAINER!!!
I have found a new subspecies in the bootleg spam plush lineage. It's probably the “nicest” looking out of the 4(?) Different bootlegs I've seen even if it's an unapologetic knockoff of the fangamer one
Let's be real here, Spamton would try on the Ice Crown from Adventure Time and would be immune to it because he's already so stupid/insane to a degree that the Crown’s curse wouldn't be able to latch onto anything. The dang thing might even make him a tiny bit saner somehow
Late Night Spam Thought:
I absolutely LOVE it when fan/official art has Spamton just barely peaking out of his dumpster where you can only see his glowing glasses and the tip of his nose. The world needs more hermit crab Spamton
I wish that they kept the drawers in Spam's shop. I imagine that they would randomly open and close by themselves and when you hover over an item for sale one of the drawers opens and shakes until you buy/exit the item. If you buy the item it slams shut with a cha-ching sound
*Dumpster lid gets quickly tossed up to the sound of glass bottles rattling*
“HEY KID, YOU WANNA BUY A WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION!?!?”
“Eh, sure okay. How much?”
“1997 KROMER!”
“I’ll give you 5 bucks and the rest of this candy bar.”
“DEAL!!!”
𝗕𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗞𝗜𝗡𝗚: DELTARUNE star Spamton G. Spamton arrested and charged with aggravated assault at New Orleans Waffle House.
"$5 never-ending breakfast platters means never-ending. I'm the one that decides when I've had enough." -Spamton G. Spamton
I like to think that Spamton can do weird haunted baby doll shit like this. Like, he's not even trying to be scary. He just forgets to move like a normal person at times.
Sad news, gang. The grand mystic jewel that the old man under the bridge sold me does NOT grant you unlimited power as he claims and instead siphons your youthfulness back to him to extend his wicked lifespan further. Easiest trick in the book and I fell for it...
Seeing new official Spamton stuff in 2024 is like being a widow that has grieved and moved on with your life and then having your seemingly dead fucking husband causally stroll into the living room, plop down on the couch, and say “Oh, hey. What's up?”