KingTweetinKamalan
@iAmSpreadlove
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Used Neuralink Salesman. Patent Holder of the Duckworth-Lewis Method.
Johannesburg/Port Louis
Joined November 2010
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$DOGS
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श्री कृष्ण
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TEMU
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Oasis
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台風の影響
• 187779 Tweets
最大5,000円報酬
• 177294 Tweets
#JAEHYUN_SMOKE_OUTNOW
• 105698 Tweets
領空侵犯
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Sven
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中国軍機
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#BufftalkxENGFA
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Good Monday
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日本領空
• 44915 Tweets
シロネン
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NuNew X The Toys
• 33026 Tweets
STEP INTO CINEMA PARADISE
• 30167 Tweets
Sultan Alparslan
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LINGORM THESTANDARD POP
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線状降水帯
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Lazさん
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緊急発進
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#恋のおしまい
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WHERE DO WE GO
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#InternationalDogDay
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Pinned Tweet
@RoryDun76684897
Spying on Zim to discover their plans to buy a Crystal Palace, and the ensuing argument about whether it's the football club or an actual crystal palace.
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She’s trying to communicate with us using dance and R2million car. The message she’s getting across is that she’s rich and powerful while the rest of us are hungry and getting 50% of our salaries.
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@eNCA
I stay and home and get that Durban beach feeling for free. I dip my fingers in the toilet water and splash it on my neck. Ya there's hints of caca and pee, but it's from people I know. The pee and caca at the Dbn beachfront is from strangers so that's a bit awkward.
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@alfred_cabonena
Clearly didn't take place in SA or the picture would have had looters emptying the plane
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When Capitec tells me I can take a loan, but only for R380
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@DasenThathiah
Like people in kzn can't hold conversations. The first thing they resort to is violence. And it has to be the most gruesome violence.
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@nthabiseng_ms
Two people come to you to borrow R1 million. One is an alcoholic who has 3 wives and no proof of address. The other is somebody who has a matric and has been working hard their entire life. Whose most likely to pay you back? It's logic. Not racism
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@MrFlexx39
@MzansiIndian03
The system is actually this: the more time you spend complaining about how you were oppressed, the less time you have to be a productive member of society. We know you were oppressed. Everybody, at some point in time was oppressed. Get over it and go to work on Monday.
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@Mikzozo2
@RomanCabanac
If you go to Australia and have children there, they will be Australian. If you go to Egypt and have children, they will be Egyptian. You stopped thinking at India and then decided to post. You're in local government, right?
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@mr_shimmy
She looks like she was part of the 12 Lost Tribes. She roamed the desert for 40 years as a warmup and then walked straight into the gym
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Ravi Shastri with the caca joke. As if we need any more proof as to why 17 streets in India are named after him
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@_mashesha
Anele but recently she has lost her wit and replaced it with bougie conversation. Talking about 20k champagne and flying to cape town for dinner. If she gets back to the humour we can relate to, it would be Anele. The rest of them think it's about them rather than the listener
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@Engen_SA
I asked one of your attendants where to get the good dagga. He pointed me to the right spot. Blessings. Maybe try encouraging your attendants to keep a bit on them? For convenience.
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@Lesufi
These are the poor ones from Soweto. The people who are both hungry and under educated. The ones who are easily convinced about anything, because they smell KFC in the air
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Kenny K teaching the rest of Africa where the real offside line is
Kenny Kunene and Gayton restoring order by the boaders
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@SabzerAzoh
My granny used to inhale it through her nose and keep some in her mouth every Sunday morning. Then she got the power to run in the sugar cane fields to catch, cut, clean and cook 3 chickens. Nowdays, as her descendant, I smoke zol and go to Woolworths for chicken schnitzel.
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@VusiSambo
Also nice to have smart Post Offices, Smart Hospitals and Smart schools. They don't even need to be smart, it's just nice to have. But instead, we get smart Taverns.
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Whose line is it anyway: Pandemic episode. 5 over paid mouth breathers tell us about the end of the world while using protective equipment meant for doctors.
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@Bound2Liberty
There's no intelligent debate anymore. The youth and many adults resort to insults and violence when presented with the opportunity to speak like grown ups. Everything is taken personally, there's no coherent argument. It's easier to burn something than hold a conversation.
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@VusiSambo
Why do these organisations keep throwing money at us when they know it's going towards corruption?
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@billynyaku
Banks don't do anything unless they are getting something out of it. What are they getting from this? Are they using it for their insurance businesses? Will they sell this data in a bundle with all the other info they have on you?
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@bluebenisrael
There needs to be a distinction between South Africa and the ANC. The majority of SA citizens don't agree with anything the anc does. They are the ruling party and they do whats good for them, not the citizens.
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@eNCA
To label the Gaza conflict as Apartheid is to misunderstand both situations. Apartheid was race based laws. Gaza conflict is based on religion rather than race. It's also not laid on law or regulation that discrimination MUST take place. Stop calling it apartheid. It's not
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@AlanWinde666
I'll gladly pay for plot 46664. Years of urination and fecal matter has made the ground fertile. I'm going to plant Curry Leaf trees, you see. Lure those Indians into Orania2.0
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@ForensicsZA
@TshweuMoleme
R2000 bet this isn't SA. They didn't knock any of the bins down. It's too neat and tidy. Even the way they drove through the glass doors. SA criminals are doing 120km, these guys are using finesse
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@eNCA
Guys I'm a professional, allow me to explain. It's called ring worm because it lives in the ring around the human anus. It moves around and gives the host what we call Itchy Anus Horriblus. Sanitize after shaking hands because people scratch their poephols when they have ringworm
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@NeilZ4EVA1234U
One lotto draw, the numbers came out 1 2 3 4 5 7. I'm sure they were rigging it. And then laughing at us.
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@DailyInvestorSA
Those reserves are long gone. Just like when Tina Joemat Peterson sold our strategic oil reserves without telling us
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@ms_tourist
@WOOLWORTHS_SA
This is one of those rare occasions where it isnt about you. The cold chain is broken. The quality and care that Woolies takes to put the products on the shelf isn't respected by you when you take it out the store. Let's choose what we get angry about, better
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@GautengANC
@Lesufi
They think that UberEats is a threat to society more than rape, poor education, potholes, crime and load shedding?
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@SABreakingNews
Thabi Leoka sitting on top of every board chairman who didn't check her qualifications properly
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@ProteasMenCSA
Ruling party instructs players to tell people to vote anc each time they get a wicket
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@Gentlements
Some argue that Ringo Starr was the luckiest man ever. Harry Maguire maybe. My nomination for Luckiest Man Ever is CR. A no talent fool who was catapulted to fame and fortune and whose life would have been different if the wind blew in a different direction that particular day.
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This is me, after I manage to light the braai using the whole box of firelighters
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@LibertarianZA
Now please leave us alone as we run into the mountains and cut each others foreskins off.
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@SimplyMegszcpt
@runawayrene
Taxi bosses announce that they will now operate the submarine routes. End of joke.
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@IOL
So the fact that they were not looting and burning things will not be taken into consideration? The mere fact that they were black would earn them the right to destroy businesses and homes
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@IanCameron23
Remember that sign language interpreter who wasn't interpreting sign language? Think it was Mandela's funeral or memorial.
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@SportArtsCultur
@Springboks
, if you didn't receive the SMS from
@sarstax
please pay your fokken taxes eh. We don't want to hear any stories about how you were out of the country and all. Make sure you right with the tax man.
#Springboks
#StrongerTogether
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This is all PR spin. Nothing of any consequence will happen to this black man. He is protected. Fine, sell all his assets but he has much more. He will be just ok.
According to Sunday World troubled Edwin Sodi's mega mansion in Morningside is up for sale at an astounding R75-million.
Most of Sodi’s properties were sold at an auction on Saturday, including his cars, houses, and company.
Edwin Sodi and his co-accused are due in court in
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@TrafficRTMC
@_mashesha
Sending a tweet is easier than actually finding them and doing your job as the authority. Everybody at RTMC comes from the same family. Employing your uncles who have no skills other than to send a tweet.
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Me and my nephews, returning to the family function after smoking a Zol in the parking lot
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@RiebvJanbeeck
We don't need to treat everything as an argument. Likewise, not everything deserves a party. Lastly, almost nothing is about you, ever, so don't take it too personally.
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@SpheDludla
Guys I hope you have done this. When you get your physical License card, you need to tap it on your forehead and download your road skills to your brain. Many people aren't doing this and it's evident on the roads. Plz, tap to download today.
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@eNCA
Of course it's abandoned guys!! The man is dead. Imagine Mandela's ghost complaining that his shirts need to be ironed.
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This is fokken Sierra Leone, not our shithole country. That sludge is the last part of the diamond mining process. They're catching the water in the hopes of finding diamonds that were too small to be collected.
💔
Poverty and inequality of black people must come to an end.
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@Abramjee
There's been a few lightning related deaths over the last year. I thought that those were very rare.
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@BarneySimon
5FM circa 2001. Mark Gilman walked from JHB to PMB to have breakfast with a listener. Sasha Martinengo once interrupted the UK Top 20 to play audio of Courtney Walsh becoming the first man to get 500 wickets. Good times. Now I listen to 702. Equally as good.
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@thuso_thelejane
Even if this nonsense worked, why waste it on this? You can't wish for lotto numbers? Maybe a R100million tender from your absent father? The mind of the local...
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@LudidiVelani
Cyril did this to us. He told us he was a businessman and a leader. Now, he's more concerned with Gaza than Gauteng.
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@Tiaan35009125
Everything in this country seems to revolve around race. Let's get a more granular look at these stats. Let's break it down by race and location if we can? Then, correlate that with education levels, unemployment numbers and who governs their municipalities.
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It's time for SA to divorce the ANC. It's like your dronky uncle who hits your aunty. But she is forced to stay with him because he owns the house that your family built. He's also renting out a bedroom to Zimbabweans. They're clog up the toilet twice a week.
The ANC in KwaZulu-Natal says the party’s former president Jacob Zuma served divorce papers when he announced he will neither vote nor campaign for the organisation in next year’s general elections.
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@PresidencyZA
This is a billionaire businessman guys. He's owned and run some of the biggest companies in the world!! And now he wants to pass this as a law.
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@AardvarkBloody
Father in heaven, LIGHT up our lives with your spirit...no, wait. Father, please ILLUMINATE our minds... That won't work either. Ancestors!! Grant us the serenity to overPOWER our detractors... I can't get this one right guys. Fok this prayer
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@TimesLIVE
Why does it need to be 1000 "sleeper". People sleep overnight at church? Why is he saying it like he's announcing a new hospital? 1000 sleeper church seems a bit odd
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@SandileKaMsibi
@AdvoBarryRoux
Honourable member, its number 3. She got to 2nd year varsity but now politicians date her. Underwear in public is her plot. Check the mastermind grin. That's her realising that she now has 4 Followers who will do anything for her.
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@AlanWinde666
@margieMYDNA
Ekse ouens. Ons hettie kamer daarbydie smokkie. Kom se sallaam-my-bru. Nee ons roekie dwelms, alkohol is soema harramie. Ons kan Jihad raak soos n familie ne. Kom kuir mybroertjie.
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@danielmarven
Imagine the Chairperson scoring a goal and for the celebration he runs into the parking lot where his helicopter takes him away. And the cameraman must run behind him while he does all this. And we must watch it on the big screen like we are his employees.
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@AardvarkBloody
If these Ministers were really master strategists, they would know enough to hoard insulin. All of them are diabetes cases.
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@alfred_cabonena
On one hand we have parents waiting outside the school to pick up their children, so you can't go to them smelling like drink. On the other hand, there are no parents there to pick up children so you can drink and become pregnant and they won't find out until grant day
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@News24
@News24_Business
Cyril has actually made a decision on firing somebody??? She wasn't giving him the required monthly contributions on time.
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@SABCNews
Oh damn! A little known workers union from South Africa has just solved the 100 year old Crisis in the Middle East.
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@GovernmentZA
Stupid fucks, it's not the marketing, it's the sale and distribution that's needs more enforcement.
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@eNCA
Now I love fear mongering as much as the next online editor, but what's the point of this?
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@SAYouthEmploy
Politicians be like: Come guys! We are giving literally anybody a gun and badge. Also, don't forget to vote ANC next year. We only really start doing our jobs a few months before each election, but still, vote for us.
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@ALooterContinua
My man in the wheelchair doing the 1/4 mile in 9 seconds. With the looted goods!
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@SimplyMegszcpt
@SowetanLIVE
I'm a big data enthusiast as well as a person trying to dabble in casual racism. Minister, break these stats down for us according to race. We want to see which people can't just drink at home. They have to show the entire community their Jack Daniels gift box
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