Rich 🤌
@heyricharnold
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High tech / low life. Designer.
New York, NY
Joined April 2009
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We now go live to Mark Zuckerberg addressing the passengers of the titanic
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Hi, I'm the manager of this ACE Hardware and we have a company policy promoting the public humiliation of cops. The employee in question was given a $500 bonus and a DieHard car battery
Sadly, one of our officers had a bad experience
@AceHardware
store in Allston today. While in the store, an employee stated, “I smell bacon.” When the officer asked for an apology, he was told there’d be none. In response, items purchased were returned and a customer lost.
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One thing I've learned working in tech is that every shit product experience you've had is a result of someone in a meeting nodding their head instead of saying, "Buddy, I'm gonna keep it real. I got no idea what the fuck you're talking about"
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Sales departments have taken web design and deposited it right in the fucking garbage at this point
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@bobby
All of male loneliness can be solved by lifting heavy shit and having a big fella say “lookin big brother”
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Product Management discourse has people needing data to justify whether they should grab an umbrella when it’s raining. Just make a decision you gd babies
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Man, pentagram is so cooked. This is the corniest shit I’ve ever seen
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Hey I’m gonna spend the night getting yelled at by morons so while we’re here I’ll be matching donations to BLM related charities until I start to sweat.
Post or DM me your receipt and I’ll match
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@mekosoff
Smart to use a throwaway though. That way if she sees it she'll think its different girl with a bone collection growing nightshade in the basement.
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Help! I said something about Dave Portnoy and I don’t think I can hold off all of them
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@rejaniced
@NYGovCuomo
"Police have to notify us within 6 hours when they murder someone" is the bleakest shit I can possibly imagine, and that's before you consider they won't even follow it anyway
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@darkfire_2017
@jackcalifano
Here's an ad from Warnock where there's a literal picture of a $2000 check
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Yo while I got all you weirdos here you if you got a few extra dollars you should send it over to your local shelter.
If you’re in NY this is where I got my homie at
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International sign for the worst fucking tacos you'll ever encounter
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Here’s my opinion on NFTs: turning everything into a speculative investment has elevated some of the most dog shit work I’ve ever seen in my life
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@JimmyGlenn711
We’ve already got 3 people working on cop humiliation but you look like you got moxy
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@CorkusBucksuth
Every time I see her I remember she’s a front runner for worst tweet of all time
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Any senior product designers interested in working on IG Stories? Number 1 perk is your manager will be a guy who's most notable achievement is a tweet about a dog who walks funny.
DM me if you're interested
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If you come with some dumbass design opinion on this website your work better be good as hell or I'm replying with a screenshot from your portfolio like when people get their avatar posted back to them
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Man I been in a fight with these 2 fucking things for so long. I just want to rest
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@Mark4Ruby
@xoxo_akyrah
She knew if she said some shit about KD he’d show up in her mentions like beetlejuice
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@jonny_is_good
Ah a very cogent metaphor. That relatable experience when the restaurant has 2 options and if you choose not to eat there you're responsible for everyone getting poisoned
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Every time a talented designer works on a dumb ass button instead of a book cover we take another step away from god’s light
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@bobby
My favorite is the Uber rebrand where they made "image" a brand element because it's actually the bottom part of the logo
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@bobby
Very insidious to eat linguine while looking out the window at a mini golf course with a giant pirate statue
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I don’t believe in soulmates but I do believe that everyone either has a Wario or is someone else’s Wario
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I was on the basketball team at IG and we played LinkedIn one time and got fucking decapitated. Just a bunch of 6’5” sales guys playing press the whole time
It was shameful
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I was making this trash back in 2010 when I was literally as bad at this job as you could possibly be
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@slut4ipas
@ddavidrenshaw
Nah man you gotta convert £ to $ first. You’re lookin at 251925.97 Virgils
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Don Draper: so he's a little Roman man and he says pizza
CEO: okay
Don Draper: twice
CEO: holy fucking shit
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Twitters getting a lot of shit for how poorly this layoff is being done but this is how we found out they were killing Vine so uh…I dunno maybe they always sucked ass at this
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Yeah we had a busy weekend, we took the kids to Sausalito. You do anything fun in New York?
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@della_morte_
I didn’t expect anything different but goddamn if this isn’t fucking embarrassing
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@25_male_nyc
*palms hostess a crisp $20 bill*
Hostess: *hands him a buzzer for when his table will be ready*
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@mekosoff
In the last 72 hours that video and this one have rewired my brain in a way I’ve not experienced since Vine
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@99MorningCoffee
@RashidaTlaib
Damn didn't realize Trump was running to be the Democratic nominee. That's wild
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All the reflective shit people are messing around with is fun and all but goddamn do not get these companies accessing your camera for silly effects. Some PM is 100% gonna get promoted for using it for ad targeting
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@saniaio
It just means they don't track the days, but real talk it's exploitative as hell. People take less time off because they don't have "days I have to use"
Also you don't get paid out for unused PTO if you leave because there is no unused PTO
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Followed
@MenInBlazers
to trick myself into liking soccer, but now the timeline is all BLOODY HELL WHAT A GOAL BY GEORGE FANNYFARTLE MATE!
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A humiliating amount of seriousness to bring to a job that is basically “should the button be round or a square”
Designers that organize their work like this don’t have their own style or way of doing things. They are just inexperienced. I have no problems calling out designers for sloppy design files. You make it impossible to collaborate with writers, engineers and other designers.
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When they were shooting the episode of Abstract on IG in New York all the NY designers came in dressed like Chalamet
Anyway they cut all the NY footage
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My brother, from the bottom of my heart, please consider using Figma
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I looked up a patent I have my name on and gang I am fucking dead at the diagram they included
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If you ask me this shit I’m quitting on the spot
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@RespectableLaw
@Bob4Florida
@mtlawmiami
@kenklippenstein
"Bob how do you think this is goin for you?"
You:
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Me in a product review
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This is how I know I’ll have a career for at least a little while longer
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@mehermakes
My whole switch to management was predicated on ascending beyond the need for a real portfolio
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Please join me for my lecture series for design students where all I talk about are the twitter famous designers who are total fucking frauds and deserve nothing but your ridicule like the buffoons they are
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I’m fortunate to have a job that will pay me to do this bullshit from home. If you don’t though and coronavirus is fucking up your money drop your Venmo in the replies and I’ll hook people up for a while
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