Lance Walton 🇺🇦🗿
@functionalcore
Followers
424
Following
604
Media
471
Statuses
27,277
Programmer (FP, Scala), pian(o player/ist). Mastodon: lancewalton @functional .cafe. Bluesy: @lancewalton .bsky.social
Farnham, England
Joined April 2021
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Pinned Tweet
@JujuliaGrace
But when you tweet into the abyss, the abyss also tweets back into you.
— Friedrich Tweetzsche
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@RobLibertarian
@ninaturner
@TheDoorOfNight
Insulin wasn’t invented. Insulin is produced by the pancreas.
What was discovered is the connection between diabetes & insulin & the means of extracting it, & lately, the means of synthesising it.
Before this, people died.
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47
3K
@dave43law
@RhonddaBryant
I don’t understand why he’s not being suspended pending an investigation, much less having people consider whether he should be allowed to continue to be PM for another 3 months.
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57
452
I don't think the "we're restoring things to how they were in 2010" is the winning statement the
@Conservatives
think it is.
"We're restoring things to how they were at the end of the previous Labour government's period in office, & undoing all of the bad shit we've done".
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@fesshole
It’s a trap. She knows he’s having an affair. She wants to know what you’re going to do.
Best just to tell her you like being lazy.
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0
398
@shaunryan
@kcolbin
The correct reaction to an exponential growth that is being measured with a several day delay is *always* going to look like an over-reaction to those who don’t understand exponentials.
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390
@MClaudioLewis
When my father died, it was me that discovered him. It’s a powerful image to see something that was alive is now… not. & that image kept coming back to me over the next few months. But slowly faded.
What has not faded is the smell. Not a bad smell, but a smell nevertheless.
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385
"I didn't vote to pump shit into the sea!!!" wail some Tory MPs.
Maybe.
But you did vote *for* Brexit, which led to insufficient sewage treatment chemicals being available.
& you did vote *against* compelling the water companies to clean up their act.
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132
336
@BestForBritain
Man who has never experienced war claims that people who lived through war are happiest.
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5
355
@NickBoles
I find the idea of an MP who values honesty, the rule of law, fairness in society, etc. and who has an astonishing intellect, tremendously exciting.
As for charisma, I prefer character. & by that, I do not mean personality.
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20
325
@andreajenkyns
"We need to overhaul the Civil Service"
"We need to reform the NHS"
Always abstract. Never concrete.
You just mean "get rid of this thing that we don't like/doesn't personally make us money"
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11
309
@RobLibertarian
@ninaturner
@TheDoorOfNight
No. I didn’t know what you meant. I only knew what you had written. I had no reason to believe that you knew that insulin is a hormone produced by the pancreas, given that you had indicated that you believed it was invented.
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1
275
@Leethetaffy1
@mrmarkdolan
Yes. The workers should absolutely put their own needs aside in order to allow companies to continue to make profits. & maybe they should consider striking only when they're asleep so that there is no disruption at all.
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3
255
@JosephLTrahan
You want to make it illegal for suppliers of food to supply anything derived from stuff that was alive?
This is a bold move.
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255
@RobLibertarian
@ninaturner
@TheDoorOfNight
The people who discovered this stuff about insulin, one of whom was Dr Frederick Banting, said “said, “Insulin does not belong to me, it belongs to the world.” He wanted everyone who needed it to have access to it.
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@BarristerNF
Is this one of those "What would you tweet to indicate that you've been kidnapped" things?
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@RobLibertarian
@ninaturner
@TheDoorOfNight
So the people who discovered it did not want to make profit from it.
Yes, there are good people out there who do not take a narrow libertarian. attitude to the world.
Unfortunately, there are also too many arseholes who are happy seeing people die in the name of profit.
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@mroliverbarnes
“What do we want?”
“Everybody to be infected!”
“When do we want it?”
“Now!!”
“Why do we want it?”
“To develop immunity!!!”
“Why do we want immunity?”
“To stop everybody from getting infec… SHIT!!!!”
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@davidallengreen
@law_and_policy
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
— George Carlin
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@toadmeister
@mrjamesbob
They haven’t stopped you from expressing your views.
They’ve just stopped you from using their platform to collect money.
You’re still free to express your views.
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@LttleGel
@muheediva01
@jamesrealezz
It’s odd that the ones who died aren’t joining in with your self-congratulation.
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@RobLibertarian
@ninaturner
@TheDoorOfNight
They sold the patent for £1 to a university.
Of course, it takes money to produce it. & that momey my needs to come from somewhere.
The problem is that, for example, the US has arranged a situation where the o lay supply is from companies that are making a 100x markup.
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0
162
@JustinBaileyart
@HeatherWheeler
If they don't declare it in their bio, it's Conservative.
They're either ashamed of their party, or realise that being associated with their party will damage them.
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@RobLibertarian
@ninaturner
@TheDoorOfNight
Yea. They are literally charging 100 times the production cost. & people are living horrible lives & dying as a result. & this is with the complicity of US governments.
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136
@SkyNews
It’s difficult to understand how someone could have less class than Susan Hall, but the Britain First candidate stepped in to show us.
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9
135
@KarlTurnerMP
@yatesco
@RishiSunak
@KwasiKwarteng
If they continue to be
@Conservatives
MPs then they support what the
@Conservatives
government is doing.
If they cross the floor, they can take this government down, & return to the
@Conservatives
when they're safely in opposition, when they can try to rehabilitate their party.
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@DaveScoff
@Peston
They should just turn it into an ex-Tory PMs retirement home. There are going to be enough of them soon.
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@RobLibertarian
@ninaturner
@TheDoorOfNight
This thinking is very narrow even from an economic point of view. People who are living close to death aren’t economically productive. If these people were given the insulin, they would become more economically productive. This benefits all.
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@BBCSimonJack
@Anna_Soubry
Interview a Tory MP & give them those figures.
I guarantee the first words they will utter will be “I don’t recognise those figures.”
Then when you tell them the source, they’ll say “What this government is doing is dealing with a very difficult situation & blah blah blah”
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@tomhfh
He also promised a Garden Bridge, 20,000 more police, 50,000 more nurses, 40 new hospitals, to get Brexit done, to level up the North, £350M/week more for the NHS, & a million other things that he has not & will not deliver.
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@LBC
@NickFerrariLBC
We shouldn't be telling our children that Tories are economically competent & have the interests of the people at heart.
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@simonharris_mbd
No. They're right. If people want to vote Conservative, they should just grab anything with a photo of themselves on it. But if they want to vote for any other party, they should check what forms of photo ID are allowed.
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107
@Qstan1776
@stacytklein
@lavern_spicer
You're right. The solution isn't completely perfect so there's no point to it at all.
9 deaths per year in Japan.
9 deaths every 2 hours in the US.
Multiply up for population size if you like. You'll still find quite a big difference.
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I'm just a programmer,
standing in front of a database,
asking who the fuck thought this schema made sense?
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eXtreme Programming 1999: We need collective code ownership in order to avoid bottlenecks, so we need continuous integration to avoid merge hell.
Agile Manifesto: Individuals & Interactions over Processes & Tools
The world: Continuous Integration is Pull Requests & Build Servers
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27
107
@KatenCheyenne
@TabbyKeats
They’re on the man’s penis! If he doesn’t get rid of them, they could implant right there & he’d end up with triplets gestating on his glans.
The urgency to have a shower or have sex with another woman to avoid a very difficult 9 months is real.
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@Dr_ElleScott
I’ve been talking to a builder. He talks about “hips”, “eves”, “gables”, “ridges”, “flashing”.
Then there’s the plumber, the electrician, the masonry guy, the decorator.
They all have specialised language to talk about their jobs.
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@RobLibertarian
@ninaturner
@TheDoorOfNight
If they can’t pay for it, & you don’t want to let them die, then either somebody else has to pay for it, or it has to be made cheaper. Which?
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@drdavidbull
I agree. Putting the Border Force staff in the position of having to do this in order to get appropriate compensation for their labour is indeed a dreadful thing to do to them at Christmas.
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97
@trussliz
@UN_HRC
@FCDOGovUK
Did you know that it is possible to tweet *without* including a photograph of yourself?
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@ShaunLintern
"take immediate steps to find extra space"
"Oh, wait a moment. There's this whole extra ward that we'd forgotten about. Silly us. & look. It's got doctors & nurses that we didn't even know we had. All we're missing now is patients to fill it with."
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@Kriggie1
@The_BBD_
@MrMcEnaney
You’re right of course. Also, in the future their mother or father won’t be there to wake them up, get them dressed, get them breakfast, get them to school, etc. So from the very first day, they should be required to do all that stuff for themselves.
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@sajidjavid
@NHSEngland
Systems under stress break.
In order to remove the stress, you need to look at what is causing the stress.
Admonishing the people who are operating under stress to “do better” isn’t helpful.
You are responsible for the stress.
Only you can fix it.
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92
@JaeronMerc
@ErrataRob
“Hi Mr. Electrician. My electricity is out. Can you help me?”
“Hi. Is it just your house? Can you see any neighbours lights on?”
“No. I’ve got lights on in my house. It’s just my oven that doesn’t work.”
“Ah ok. So you’ve got electricity. You just have a problem with your oven?”
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@BestForBritain
But they’ve got the Brexit Remainers voted against. The one that we suspected we’d get.
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@baekdal
Is it just brightness? Just turning up brightness doesn’t seem to help because it’s got no contrast left.
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@fesshole
This is completely immoral. Subjecting anybody, not to mention a family member, to McDonald’s coffee is disgraceful.
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@theweeflea
@approvedproduct
@alimorris356
The Christian god says that there is no god other than its 3-in-1 self. It’s in the nature of monotheistic religions.
Thats why tolerance for the beliefs of others is required if we don’t want a full on religious war.
You don’t want a full on religious war, do you?
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@tomhfh
When you tweeted this a few weeks ago, it was obvious that you neglected to exclude all of the money paid in useless PPE & Track & Trace that was laundered through the NHS budget.
Have you made the same “mistake” again?
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@Keir_Starmer
My children go to state schools.
1) Parents who send their children to private schools have already paid tax on the income they need to pay for the private school.
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@CRobertson_LD
Attendance is an outcome, primarily impacted by illness.
Stop trying to address the outcome.
Address the cause.
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@BladeoftheS
Even if it were true, it would just be another example of 17.4 million people NOT in fact knowing what they were voting for.
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@BestForBritain
When Badenoch occupies the position of “voice of reason” in a discussion , things are very bad indeed.
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@theresecoffey
@KelvingroveArt
& lo! Jesus said unto the multitude “Why provide food for the hungry children when a turnip is a possibility?” But the multitude doubted & said “But Lord, the fruit & veg section is bare.” & Jesus replied “it is not my job to worry about people dying of starvation.”
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@christinabohons
@PeteUK7
@cactusapinyona
Yes. The incredible success of vaccination programs has led people to believe that we no longer need vaccination programs.
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@channingwalton
@SwiftOnSecurity
One day, a dev made a very large fake trade.
The manager saw it on his event log, didn’t realise it was one of the fake accounts, & hedged the trade by placing one in the opposite direction.
Fortunately, the manager’s real trade was in the right direction & made quite a lot.
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@andrew_lilico
@nmdacosta
He stood before the nation many times & said “Don’t do these things”.
He then did those things many times.
He then lied many times about doing those things.
This is not a trivial case of a minor infraction of the law.
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@KayBurley
So when he says that they'll be watching hour by hour, he means that he won't be watching for another 5 days.
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@Conservatives
I believe:
1) Margaret Thatcher had clear principles that she could articulate & she strived to apply those principles in her time as PM.
2) Margaret Thatcher’s principles were absolutely horrendous.
Do you see how I can hold both of those opinions without contradiction?
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@AnnaJerzewska
I distinctly remember this issue explicitly being raised very early on in the campaigns.
Decried as “Project Fear”.
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@MrHarryCole
It really doesn’t matter.
They have made it clear that they would cut the 45% tax bracket & pay for it by cutting support for the poorest people in our country.
They may u-turn in an effort to save their own political careers but they’ve shown clearly what they are.
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@Telegraph
I wish it destroyed the ability of social commentators to write complete bollocks in national newspapers.
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67
@NeilDotObrien
Should
@Conservatives
MPs be able to rent each other’s houses, this getting their mortgages & rent paid by the state?
Should
@Conservatives
MPs be able to live with their parents occasionally & claim thousands of pounds of utility bills under expenses?
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66
@SkyNews
The world has moved on from the
@Conservatives
, as Ben Bradley will find out at the next GE.
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@AlPinkerton
@LBC
I asked a similar question yesterday. Any are the number of days holiday they take restricted? They are after all paid to work for their constituents, even while Parliament is in recess.
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@thepublicgets
Yeah. Except if you were a cheap suit, then you’re cheap. But if you were an expensive suit, then you’re not a proper socialist. & If you wear the wrong colour shirt, you’re classless & if you wear the wrong tie you’re pretentious.
Let’s evaluate people based on what that do.
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@PeteUK7
It's weird, isn't it.
A: We need to learn to live with it.
B: OK. So what have you learned & what changes have you made based on what you've learned?
A: No. I mean we need to just ignore it & get on with our lives.
B: OK. So exactly the opposite of learning then.
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@tomebright
@christopherhope
I’d say there were more questions for Farage.
Why did Farage do nothing about the Horizon scandal?
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@implausibleblog
I think he may be right. I mean look at the damage that Priti Patel, Suella Braverman, Rishi Sunak, Boris Johnson, James Cleverley, etc. have done & are doing to the country.
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8
62
@Andypolitics22
@SamanthaTaghoy
I see Tory councillors are not Tory, but Labour councillors are Labour.
I’ve never heard anything more Tory in my life.
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1
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@RobLibertarian
@ninaturner
@TheDoorOfNight
Or, we could just say that they should be more wealthy, or die. After all, the production of meat based economic units is cheap & so simple almost all human adults can do it. Let’s just let the defective ones die, eh.
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@jonlis1
It’s a fucking weird argument in any case: We couldn’t use the veto because Turkey is a key ally. But the idea of Turkey, a key ally, joining the EU was enough to make us want to leave the EU.
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60
@WustFred
@Otto_English
Yes, but, we can’t just have the EU deciding everything for us. We need an arrangement where each member state can have a say & have a vote on what they want to happen. Maybe elected representatives of each member could meet up in some kind of “European Parliament” to do this...
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1
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@LindparkRp
@TobyonTV
Yes, & English could be renamed "letters", or "words" for the advanced study.
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@SkyNews
Alternatively: A patient told Sky News she had to borrow money for a privately-funded operation after an NHS staff member said government lack of funding meant many operations were being cancelled.
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@Keir_Starmer
@RachelReevesMP
It won’t be the best country in the world to start a new business.
Somewhere in the EU will fill that role.
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54
@Kevin_Maguire
@eyejosh
I don’t think they care about the voters. They have no intention of having another democratic General Election. I don’t mean there won’t be a vote. There will be. It just won’t be able to return anything other than a Tory majority.
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@MartinDaubney
No. You're confusing not working with not being at a desk. Because you have a limited view of what working is.
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53
@frankie06908512
@bobfitz64
@Otto_English
@wellsnz
I’m sure you and all your friends do. That says more about you & your friends than anything else though.
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0
53
@LemSip27
@sharron_honey
Same.
We have Diane Abbot & Owen Jones basically inciting a “don’t vote for Labour because Starmer” campaign at the moment.
Labour’s biggest problem at the imminent GE is going to be Labour’s most vocal supporters.
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@fourlrg
@implausibleblog
Are they in Europe?
Do they have some alternative? Such as a concise, written constitution?
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