tweets a random quote from journal 3, lost legends, the show, and more! (every quote included!!!)
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@fordpinesstim
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Barely monitoring typos at this point. Just making sure he doesn't stop posting randomly. If you see a typo, feel free to DM it to me either on here or
@acupofcc
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Dipper had warned me about Fiddleford's uneven mental state, but when I saw that he was living at the dump, it became clear how deeply I had hurt this man that I had once held so dear.
Hi! I don't want to block people on this account, but I might have to if you start getting sexual in the replies. It makes me genuinely super uncomfortable!!!
On a lighter note: tbob quote additions on the 23rd??? Maybeeee???
Before I left, Fiddleford insisted that I listen to him play the banjo. I could have sworn that as he joyfully played, I could see the age lift off his face, and see the Fiddleford who had been my friend so many years ago.
Even though the quotes from Book of Bill have been added to the quote doc, they will NOT be added into this bot for at least another month in order to allow this bot to remain (mostly) spoiler-free. :-)
BILL TAUGHT ME THAT HE “INSPIRED” GREAT MINDS THROUGHOUT HISTORY. NOW I KNOW THE TRUTH! HE TRICKED AND TERRORIZED GREAT MINDS, AND HISTORY IS LITTERED WITH RECORDS OF HIS TREACHERY!
Hidden deep within the recesses of the stony caverns, I could hear Bill's shrill voice:
“SIXER WANTS TO PLAY HIDE-AND-SEEK! FIRST ONE TO FIND HIM AND BRING HIM TO ME GETS THEIR OWN GALAXY.”
If you “ain't afraid of no ghosts,” you're an idiot. Fearing them is totally rational! Also, “ain't afraid of no” is a double negative. So, either way, the ghosts win.
2) GET AN ANNOYING SONG STUCK IN YOUR HEAD. IF YOUR HEAD IS FILLED WITH TERRIBLE MUSIC, IT WILL MAKE BILL WANT TO LEAVE INDEFINITELY. I RECOMMEND USING THAT HORRIBLE SONG THEY PLAY AT THAT FAMOUS MOUSE-THEMED AMUSEMENT PARK. YOU KNOW THE ONE. I DARE NOT SPEAK ITS NAME.
4) NEVER SLEEP. HARDER THAN IT SOUNDS! I’VE BEEN AWAKE FOR 72 HOURS STRAIGHT, AND BILL HAS KEPT OUT OF MY BRAIN COMPLETELY! IN FACT…I AM SO TIRED…I CAN BARELY WRITE ANY LONGER…MY EYELIDS…ARE GETTING HEAVY…MUST…NOT…FALL…ASLEEP.
I have something to ask of you. You remember our plans to sail around the world on a boat? Take this book, get on a boat, and sail as far away as you can! To the edge of the Earth! Bury it where no one can find it!
Stanley Pines was the man who saved the world, not me. I spent so long thinking he was a selfish jerk, and he turned out to be the most selfless man I've ever met in any dimension.
What are the odds that in this one dimension, I can find someone who understands me or what I've been through? No. The life before me is one of constant solitary vigilance against the unimaginable insanity that is Bill Cipher.
Babies learn to roll dice before they learn to walk, and no one over the age of five goes anywhere without their lucky deck of cards. Even choosing your soul mate is left to Lady Luck.
Soos had apparently told her everything about me by the time we met. She was so unfazed by seeing me that she simply said “Sup, Stan Two?” and started casually typing to her friends on one of the computing phones that seem so popular in the present.
F's reaction did not disappoint! He was in such shock that he pulled out some of his hair! (I do worry about his tendency toward anxiety; I may need to train him my advanced forms of meditation in the future.)
Yes, it’s me again. No, I’m not going to give you another lecture, I realize I cannot admonish you for reading along any more than I can admonish myself for the same sin.
Hidden deep within the recesses of the stony caverns, I could hear Bill's shrill voice:
“SIXER WANTS TO PLAY HIDE-AND-SEEK! FIRST ONE TO FIND HIM AND BRING HIM TO ME GETS THEIR OWN GALAXY.”
Don't believe your eyes? Good. You don't have to! This bizarre sorcerer is completely impossible to see with the naked eye. However, with night vision goggles, I was able to get a brief glance of him trying on my suits in my closet. (He later turned my goggles into a bat.)
I tussled his hair and smiled at him. “Your secret's safe with me, Mason.” I said. “And I think it's a great name. The Masons are a great secret society, you know.” He smiled.
I believed Bill came from a similar world that was mysteriously destroyed. But how? I didn't have much time to investigate. The Exwhylians considered me to be an “Irregular” shape, which is vulgar in their society.
Oddness is strangely, mysteriously drawn to this place, from misshapen jelly beans, to gnomes and fairies to dinosaurs, interdimensional tears, clones, crazy ex-presidents, even men with six fingers and boys with strange birthmarks.
Plus, after growing up dirt-poor in Tennessee, he fantasized about making enough to afford a nice place with a screen door that wasn't broken. I could relate to his ambition.
What a pleasure it was to share one of my greatest secret discoveries with another brilliant mind! As we journeyed through wreckage, I could see F filled with the very same awe I felt when I first came upon the site.
Fiddleford has become increasingly skeptical of the creature, reminding me every day that the only reason we're keeping him is to test the cryogenic tube once it's complete.
Findings:
1) Hair growth appears in strange, awkward patches. Is he a man? Is he a baby?
2) Evidence of autolysis suggests that he survived a zombie bite. When I brought this up, he laughed and said, “That was one crazy party, dude.”
NEW DISCOVERY! THAT ABNORMALLY HAIRY MAILMAN DOESN'T DELIVER MAIN ON THE FULL MOON! AND UNLIKE MOST MAILMEN, HE SEEMS TO GET NO HARASSMENT FROM BARKING DOGS. DOES THIS MEAN WHAT I THINK IT MEANS? I MAY NEED TO LOAD UP ON SILVER BULLETS JUST IN CASE.
I recognized the name instantly! Stanley's other hired helper is the teenage daughter of “Boyish Dan” Corduroy, the local lumberjack who helped construct my lab back in the 1980s. (I hear he's grown quite a bit since then.)
1) S is an overgrown child with none of my vigorous mental training. Who knows what could happen if Cipher stepped inside Stanleuy’s ind for even one minute…
WAYS TO KEEP BILL CIPHER OUT OF YOUR MIND:
1) WEAR A TINFOIL HAT. THE METAL SHIELDS YOUR BRAIN WAVES AND ALSO COMES IN HANDY IF YOU NEED TO KEEP A SANDWICH FRESH. IGNORE PEOPLE WHO STARE. THEY ARE JEALOUS.
6. BILL-DETECTING VISOR
I’ve tried using a small light to detect possession, but these will be infinitely superior.
7. CLOAK SWEN FROM UNICORN HAIR
Will need to convince a unicorn that I’m pure of heart. (May need to invent heart-purification ray for this part).
I aced Cryptology in college, so this will be fun! (At least for me. It would be deeply tedious and annoying for someone trying to decipher it.) It amuses me to think of their frustrating effort!
JOURNAL 2
THE MOST DANGEROUS JOURNAL! CURSES, INCANTATIONS, & DARK POWER BECAME AN OBSESSION IN THIS VOLUME. DESCRIBES THE HIDIDNG PLACES OF THE MYSTIC AMULET. I BURIED THE AMULET ONCE I LEARNED THAT IT CORRUPTS YOUR SOUL (AND WHITENS YOUR HAIR)!
Findings:
1) Hair growth appears in strange, awkward patches. Is he a man? Is he a baby?
2) Evidence of autolysis suggests that he survived a zombie bite. When I brought this up, he laughed and said, “That was one crazy party, dude.”
If you “ain't afraid of no ghosts,” you're an idiot. Fearing them is totally rational! Also, “ain't afraid of no” is a double negative. So, either way, the ghosts win.
Bill's universe is not exactly a dimension, but rather a boiling, shifting intergalactic foam between dimensions—a lawless, unstable crawl space between worlds that only the strangest and most unknowable beings call home.
Dipper. Listen to me. We can find your sister soon, but first we have to stop Bill. If we can blast him back through the rip he came our of, we just might be able to stop him before his weirdness spreads across the entire globe.