megan thee stallions twerk wind
@fingerlump
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while you’ll be seeking, i’ll be gleeking.
Joined June 2019
i only brake for pedestrians in the aldi parking lot. good luck to everyone else.
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dont worry darling boldly asks the question: what if a white lady tried to write a jordan peele movie.
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ellie: “i actually cannot look at harry styles anymore. …and i respect him for that.”.
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witnessing a sexual awakening (zach experiencing dc metro).
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@jeremyoharris being 6'5" doing playwriting instead of basketball. mans worried about the wrong drafts.
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the sexual tension between me and the pfizer plant.
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nobody: .cirque du K in the middle of the day on the quad:.
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went on a date yesterday and as he pulled out his ID at a bar he also accidentally pulled out his costco card and it was at this point i knew i had to fuck this man.
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paying $5 for a latte at fourth coast is fine because it includes the admission fee for watching this blonde girl enthusiastically overshare about her autoimmune disorder on the first date.
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why does it look like every woman barista at waterstreet has been working for 8 hrs straight while every man barista has not lifted a finger.
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white k students on study abroad.
When White teachers show up in urban schools after Teach For America training
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teachers in high school: college is SERIOUS! your professors will NOT be as forgiving as i am!. my french professor, from the instagram account that she made for her cats:
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standing in solidarity with the white women in my feminist psychology class who are discovering that racism exists❤️.
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after my restaurant shifts i regain consciousness and sometimes remember the shit i said to customers, for example one guy was complaining that he couldnt catch this trout bc it was too fast for him n i said "yeah those'll rly get away from ya." ive never been fishing.
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perhaps this is a deeply local take but i hate when ppl r like oh youre from/live in kalamazoo im sorry 😝 like damn what if i like being from here tf.
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every day at this school i have to remind myself that i'm not ugly it's just that everyone else is white.
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the fact that this is not an onion headline. lol.
‘My heart was wrenched with pain,’ assistant chief says of ordering tear gas on protesters
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me when i have to walk anywhere on K's campus that's not 3 minutes away
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my name is basically impossible to pronounce correctly unless you also speak the language that it comes from so the american/english pronunciation is what i've had to go by since starting school and i've accepted it. im so happy that hasan made this choice. ❤️.
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me: greta van fleet is in kalamazoo today?!.julia: the climate girl??????.
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lets talk about the difference between an outfit actually being cute vs an outfit being worn by a skinny person.
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the person u make eye contact with when ppl r being crazy is such a tight bond.
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i think a lot of ppl forget that showing up to events like SJP's gathering last week is important but what's also important is to redistribute the wealth that we know for a damn fact PLENTY of students at k college have.
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rest in peace freddie mercury you would have loved megan thee stallion.
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college is just venmoing each other amounts of $5-15 dollars til one of you dies.
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why do i live in a world where i have to be on facetime with my sister who is barricaded in a dark room, listening to the police scanner, and tracking on a campus map where i hear reported shots fired in case they approach her location? why?.
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good luck to the 12493948 K students abroad in italy this semester.
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avatar is like what if indigenous people were real.
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i hate kzoo tinder i accidentally superliked matthew mueller and then immediately after him was the guy that i fucked who only made me cum once over several hookups after i asked him repeatedly and then asked me if the picture of mitski on my wall was me.
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mourning my most recent one-sided parasocial relationship. your thoughts and prayers are appreciated during this time.
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making my airdrop available to everybody in the second dose vaccine line in case anyone wants to shoot their shot.
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good morning! the white woman marketing manager for face off has been spelling aleshea harris’ name wrong on all marketing (i just corrected her) and just spelled my last name wrong despite her also legitimately copying and pasting my bio 🫶🏼
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cute checkout boy at aldi i am free tuesday night to hang out. if you want to hang out tuesday night we can hang out since i am free on tuesday night when im free.
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incredible content from kalamazoo college's student development website
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everyone else: i will die if i don't finish this final .seniors: if i finish this final i will die.
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i've noticed that so many men esp. white men who consider themselves socially conscious/"""woke""" will gladly go on these tangents abt social issues but then when a woman esp. a nonwhite woman says the exACT same thing suddenly they wanna consider other angles?? hm.
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in case anybody still thought my twitter name was a joke
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continuing my reign as megan thee stallions twerk wind
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random man just approached me to ask what my « nationality or ethnicity » is and for the first time in my life i declined to answer and he said « my bad i just thought you were filipino or something…. » omg come back bae im sorry do u wanna come have dinner at my parents house.
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we don't fuck he just picks me up from trader joe's.
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how come eula biss got a degree from kalamazoo college before i did.
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happy pride month from my text inbox this morning
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well guys it finally happened. i have been told by my therapist in her professional medical opinion to stop fucking white men.
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me: *burps*.teams: Your microphone is muted.
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that second Leave button on zoom after u click the first Leave button really kicks my ass.
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if u couldnt tell tonight i discovered jeremy o harris' height and it changed me.
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i went home yesterday and the first thing my mom said is that i look like loonnette from big comfy couch man im never visiting home again
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forehead card never declines 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
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me: im not ready to be a mom.my mom: yeah, 23 is too young. me, 21 years old: ?.
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k college intimacy choreo direct deposit hit today + two other checks from other theatres for intimacy… talk to me nice…
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my favorite hobby is unashamedly smashing on leftovers during online class i truly do not give a god damn fuck.
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ms k finally got married today now we can call her ms vandercoochie or whatever her husbands name is.
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coming home to an empty house for the 11th night in a row but also not wanting to invite anyone over for pandemic + introvert reasons
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can one of you k people in italy go find megan thee stallion and propose to her for me.
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me: my name is pronounced ynika.two of my coworkers who have known me for a week now and who i've worked multiple shifts with: IN THE CUT?.
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remember when i had a guy over and he saw my print of mitski on my wall and said "is that you?" . yeah im never having sex w a white man ever again.
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got to the gym and realized i forgot my headphones. currently checking my email on the treadmill.
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i think we can all agree that the k student body page.
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white people do indeed have a culture and that culture is racism.
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spring allergy season. fighting for my fucking life.
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is there literally any coffee place in kalamazoo that is not aggressively overrun by "white girl with elbow tattoo" baristas and their variants. pls advise, thanks.
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im watching brooklyn nine nine and i think ive developed a crush on andy s🤢🤢🤢🤢andy samb🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢i cant even say it.
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what age do you think you are in your head? for me im 17. whenever someone asks how old i am i have the instinct to say im 17 and then remember i am about to be 23.
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lukia couldn't remember the term "menstrual cycle" so she said "ovarian rhythm".
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gingers be so fine when you dont have andrew backer in ur ear telling u theyre ugly.
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lukia was asking me how i tanned so quickly after sitting on the porch for ten minutes and i had to explain to her that i am a Person of Color.
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i can't believe my two years of directing the abortion monologues for feminist psychology of women at kalamazoo college didn't work.
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one of the funniest things a man has ever said to me was in bed the morning after hooking up and my full volume standard iphone alarm went off and he said “thats your wake up alarm? no wonder you’re angry all the time”.
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i will never be a singer-songwriter because i lack the talent but mostly i'm afraid someone will do the thing where they pull up my dating history and be like "this is who she wrote that song about".
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every white person in the world is at the kalamazoo farmers market.
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if anyone has any leads on ways to redistribute funds + directly donate to the Gun Lake Tribe communities / Potawatomi peoples, please share - every non-native who lives in Kalamazoo resides on Potawatomi land and we should redistribute our funds accordingly.
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if u think peeping something on social media and getting your feelings hurt is bad try logging onto moodle and seeing a quiz due for week 2.
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in class discussions i'm like "white americans ruined my life and western society is killing me more and more each day" and without fail a white woman is like "thank you for sharing<3".
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it feels illegal that i am writing a cover letter while the south is like underwater rn.
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cannot believe my iphone doesnt want me to be great
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idk who needs to hear this but youre not good at improv youre just white and decent at pantomiming actions.
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there's really some white women auditioning for the play this qtr when there are . 0 white women characters in the play? perplexed.
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overheard from lukia as she works on homework by herself: "you're on my nerves. you're not getting on them, you're on them.".
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dude on date was telling me how he was “frodo’d” during the height of the pandemic and i laughed cuz i had never heard that before but he didnt laugh and looked kinda confused and as he was talking about unemployment i realized he actually said “furloughed”.
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me not getting attention: i hate this.me getting attention: i hate this.
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white people love climbing on some rocks.
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you can tell if a person is from Kalamazoo or not based on how they pronounce "westnedge".
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