Knottingley FC
@FcKnottingley
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🚨: Knottingley FC can confirm Luis Sinisterra is a fucking cunt
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🚨: BREAKING NEWS. Due to breaking FFP rules in the 2022/23 season..
@TheDoylems
have been stripped of their league title and has now been awarded to Knottingley FC. Making us CHAMPIONS 🏆
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🌝 Post Match Interview with Dougie Martin and Luke Jaques
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WANTED: Has anyone seen this man. He’s a local criminal mastermind who recently scammed an old women out of a cornetto.
@TheDoylems
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Brandon realising it’s not actually coming home tonight… 😬
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It’s the day we’ve all been waiting for, we’d like to announce our new strip for the new season brought to you by
@PUMATeamwear
#TheKnottlasComing
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Here is Robbie’s squad for tomorrow!
2. Kieran French
3. Luke Jaques
4. James Lockett
6. Kieran Hoaksey
9. Matty Dalton
10. Harvey Love
14. Morgan Tucker
16. Joe Winstanley
29. Tom Smith
51. Jake Lowe
88. Dougie Martin (C)
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🚨: Knottingley FC can confirm a bid has been rejected for striker Kieran French from Premier League Leeds United. We reiterate our striker is not for sale.
#FTC
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We will be making no further comment on manager
@JackSW19991740
.
A British Airways pilot has been sacked after reports he snorted cocaine off a topless woman before trying to fly a passenger plane back to London
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Our Pakistani followers are having a party tonight 🇵🇰💙🤍 go on lads
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Knottingley FC, would like to thank FC Barcelona and Real Madrid for their invitation to the Super League.
We would gladly accept this as we look to progress into a new league where the refs aren’t fucking shite
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FT: Knottingley FC 3-2 Mad Ox FC.
Knottla end Mad Ox’s winning streak with a great performance. FTC 🔵⚪️
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We managed to get a word with goalkeeper
@kieranfrench2
after last nights game. It’s fair to say the lad was buzzing with his performance. On behalf of the club french congratulations on a fantastic performance!
#Itsfortheclub
🔵⚪️
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The team vs Young Kells
6. Kieran Hoaksey (gk)
51. Jake Lowe
16. Joe Winstanley
14. Morgan Tucker
3. Luke Jaques
2. Kieran French
Subs: James Lockett, Harvey Love, Tom Smith, Dougie Martin (c)
Matty Dalton will be Barrett’s assistant on the sideline
#UTK
💙🤍
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🚨: The news we’ve all been waiting for… Knottingley FC can confirm the signing of ex Barnsley player Matty Doyle after 2 goals on his trial last week.
#WelcomeMatty
#FTC
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Some performance from the lads, 100% from everyone against a very decent team. FOR THE CLUB 🔵⚪️
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We have also added to the back room staff! Please welcome new physio
@lishiaautumnx
.
She was eager to join when we said we would be paying her wages in Ansinthe and I don’t blame her to be fair.
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As always thanks to KHANS Knottingley for sponsoring us. Here’s last nights MOM Kieran French with his Chicken Madras, enjoy pal🔵⚪️
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Just so we can give Only Fools a sleepless night, here’s the team for tomorrow!
6. Kieran Hoaksey (GK)
10. Harvey Love
16. Joe Winstanley
3. Luke Jaques
29. Tom Smith
14. Morgan Tucker
Subs: 2. Kieran French, 4. James Lockett, 9. Matty Dalton, 88. Dougie Martin (C)
#UTK
💙🤍
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The Team
2. Kieran French
3. Luke Jaques
4. James Lockett
5. Josh Jaques
6. Kieran Hoaksey
7. Rob Thomas
9. Matty Dalton
10. Harvey Love
14. Morgan Tucker
16. Joe Winstanley
17. Tris Oselton
21. Robbie Barrett
29. Tom Smith
88. Dougie Martin (C)
Physio - Alishia Coles
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Knottingley FC would like to wish one of our own good luck in the FA Cup today against Stockport County. Into em
@Starc2Aleks
👊
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We challenge any 5 aside/6 aside team in the UK and Ireland for after lockdown and when we can start playing football again. Preferably we want a decent trip so 100 miles away will do fine, get this shared and reached out to as many 6 aside teams as possible
#UTK
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It sure is going to be one hell of a season for the knottla boys in the
@premierleague
this season.
#TheKnottlascoming
#Fortheclub
#FuckoffSutty
🔵⚪️
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FT: Knottingley FC 2-1 Astro FC. Match Abandoned with 6 minutes left due to a physical incident.
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Unfortunate tonight lads, played well but things just didn’t click in the final third. Fair play to Only Fools, came with a game plan and played it perfectly, no bad blood here. Cba doing match report tonight cos I’m going to sink these cans instead. Man of match shall be on soon
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Hi
@Dougie88martin
.
Are u and ur bird still going to each other’s houses or have u grown up yet? Just wondering before us as a club report u to Boris.
#FTC
#StaySafe
#DontBeADickLikeDougie
💙🤍💙
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Forget McBurnie in the Swansea end yesterday, Morgan Tucker has just been kicked out of Winterseam for scrapping with bouncer because he forgot his ID. Head up Tuck
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The Zain MOTM award goes to our number 1 - Joe Winstanley 🧤
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Here is Baz’s team for the game today:
16. Joe Winstanley (GK)
10. Harvey Love
14. Morgan Tucker
88. Dougie Martin
6. Kieran Hoaksey
4. James Lockett
Bench:
2. Kieran French
29. Tom Smith
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DERBY DAY👊 Knottingley FC vs Ponte FC 8:30 KO @ The Hut Fans are advised to set off in plenty of time to get there.
#KFC
#ItsForTheClub
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Our director of football
@joerich7010
setting the record straight.
#Theknottlascoming
#itsfortheclub
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🚨: Trialist Kaiden Lofthouse has put pen to paper, becoming our first permanent signing of the new campaign. footballer by day, friendly neighbourhood super hero by night.
#WelcomeKaiden
#FTC
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🚨: Great win for the lads. 7-1 win on our return. Goals from Starcenko (5), French and Jaques gives us a the start we need.
#FTC
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Teams News for Tomorrow’s game against Chin FC.
Gk.
@kieranlufc6
Rb.
@morgan_tucker14
Lb.
@SamJackson452
Rm.
@RobbieB4Z
Lm.
@Brad_Olbison19
St.
@harveylove10
Bench:
@Dougie88martin
,
@haWk_yy
,
@tommsmith01
#FTC
💙🤍
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Statement:
@Dougie88martin
has been suspended from all football activity for 4 months starting when the football season begins again. This is due to breaching the clubs code of conduct during lockdown. The club will make no further comments.
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🚨: Knottingley FC can confirm Striker Kieran French has been handed a lifetime ban for an undisclosed reason. Knottla as a club are shocked and appalled by the decision and therefore we will be appealing the decision. Updates will be given in due course.
#FTC
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Bit of fun from the admin team tonight, we’ve made all our lads into legends of the game starting off with the Knottingley Neuer!
@kieranlufc6
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Squad numbers:
1. Ella Bailey
2. Kieran French (GK)
3. Luke Jaques
4. James Lockett
6. Kieran Hoaksey
9. Matty Dalton
10. Harvey Love
14. Morgan Tucker
16. Joe Winstanley
21. Robbie Barrett
29. Tom Smith
69. Casey Farrell
88. Dougie Martin (C)
Physio - Alishia Coles
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Squad announcement for tomorrow:
3. Luke Jaques
4. James Lockett
6. Kieran Hoaksey
9. Matty Dalton
14. Morgan Tucker
16. Joe Winstanley
29. Tom Smith
88. Dougie Martin
And Robbie Barrett may potentially make his first appearance of the season but is a doubt at the minute.
#UTK
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When you realise it’s another 6 sleeps til Knottla play again 😓
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FT: Knottingley FC 5-5 Fisherman’s
⚽️
Luke Jaques
Dougie Martin
Harvey Love
Kieran French
Nigel Hoaksey
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Day or Night, Knottla’s looking fine! Introducing the new Knottingley FC kit
#BlueSeaOfKnottla
#TheKnottlasComing
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You’d think a club with someone who claims to be a paralegal but isn’t really would understand how to inform players on player safety during training.
@CarletonFc
, shambles of a club.
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The club would like to announce the emergency loan of Mitch McHugh from his bird to return to the club. We have been in touch all day trying to get this deal through but his bird has not been answering the fax machine. Now let’s all reminisce Mitch’s best moment at the club.
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Tonight’s Team… 🦦
3. Luke Jaques
6. Kieran Hoaksey
10. Harvey Love
14. Morgan Tucker (GK)
19. Kieran French
35. Sam Wright
37. Nathan Garfoot
88. Dougie Martin (C)
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Knottingley FC would like to apologise for the gaffers
@JackSW19991740
behaviour on Saturday night and would like to make no further comment on the matter 🔵⚪️
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Everyday I sit here and think, it’s amazing how much we live inside every only fools players head🥰
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Knottla fc are thrilled to announce
@tommsmith01
has signed a new 20 year deal to keep him at the club until summer 2040. Tom had to say “Its an honour to sign for my boyhood club it’s a dream to wear the shirt every week, I can’t wait to win the league and lift the trophy”!!
#ftc
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Introducing the new Knottingley FC home and goalkeeper shirts, brought to you by
@PUMATeamwear
.
Shirts will be ready to preorder on 28/06/2021.
#UTK
💙🤍
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FT: Knottingley FC 7-1 Ponte’s Finest. Game cut short after 15 mins due to opponents turning up late
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Knottingley FC would again like to apologise for the gaffers
@JackSW19991740
behaviour on Saturday night
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The CFEB Consortium, the manager (Barrett) and all the players have discussed this morning about the European Super League and have agreed we will not be taking part as it goes against everything we believe in with the beautiful game.
#UTK
💙🤍
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Wishing our physio
@lishiaautumnx
well and hope her operation is a success.
#backstronger
#ftc
#WeveGotTheFittestPhysio
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Great performance from the boys tonight, shows a lot about our team to grind out a win like that!
#ForTheClub
#TheKnottlasComing
💙🤍
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Joe Winstanley signs 60 year (lifetime) deal with the club!
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Just to be clear if any of our players turn up to Carleton FC training with bastard shin pads on tomorrow then you’re getting dropped.
Joe Winstanley
Director of Football
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🚨: Better late than never. But we can confirm our expected return to the 3G on the 29th March 2021. More news in due course.
#FTC
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Just seen
@fryston_6
’s leaked Line up for their opening game in league. Young Kells best be careful
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Looks like Carleton FC in training
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Matchday! Knottingley FC v Ponte’s Finest FC. First game of the new season for the lads 🔵⚪️
#FTC
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The Team vs Young Kells:
16. Joe Winstanley (GK)
3. Luke Jaques
4. James Lockett
88. Dougie Martin (C)
6. Kieran Hoaksey
14. Morgan Tucker
Bench: 9. Matty Dalton, 21. Robbie Barrett
#UTK
#TheKnottlasComing
💙🤍
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Here are some words from skipper
@Dougie88martin
following our title win. “Boys I’d just like to say it’s been an absolute honour being the captain for such a remarkable club, our first title of many is now in the bag and tonight we start to as we mean to go on to get the...
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We’re still in tier 3, think it’s time for a change in government. Give it Baz till end of the season
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