[burglar gently waking me] you live like this?

@GovernorShapiro the entire Philadelphia transit system will be on strike on Election Day unless you help. This could swing the entire election.

@theshamingofjay I am NOT happy about this decision, but you’re playing well.

@GovernorShapiro What’s up with Pa state minimum wage? It’s embarrassing.

RT @ericsshadow: I don't think Alexander Graham Bell intended for us to watch porn over the telephone.

RT @ericsshadow: 8am: egg white omelette (no cheese) 12pm: one apple, one banana, one yogurt 6pm: chicken Caesar salad (light dressing)…

@beardimusprime Thank you

Seems like just yesterday I was reading instructions on how to open a box of wine and now I can open it with one hand in the car.

RT @Cpin42: Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store

RT @ericsshadow: NASA: you've been selected to spend a year on the space station ME: wow that's awesome NASA: you and your entire family! M…

RT @ericsshadow: 30 days has September April June and November All the rest have 31 Except January which has 4,000

@GovernorShapiro How’s the minimum wage increase going

RT @ericsshadow: People say I'm a terrible father, but when my four year old broke his collar bone, who's the guy that dropped him off at t…

RT @ericsshadow: Parenthood: When you make enough money to live an exciting, comfortable, stress free life, but decide to have kids instead.

Wouldn’t it make more sense to watch what you want on Netflix then cancel and get Max then cancel and get Disney and so on… instead of paying for 7,000,000 shows at the same time.

tv apps cost 15.99 per month then want to charge you 4.99 to watch home alone

RT @mayamanion: They say motherhood is the hardest job on earth. Not the way I do it.

@E_Ville13 We’ll see you in November

@MikeGallagher70 @EmbarrassedTomC I’m not. Conservatives don’t want min wage raised.