hi. my name is ecto & im a dead rat.🐀🎀
im a monster girl made of bunch of people & rats that died in the black plague.
i spent a lot of time in sewers but now im a neet who talks about cults & eats dirt~
i ♡ horror games, vr, mmorpgs & cute things!!
I HIT 10K ON TWITCH!!🥹
i cannot express to you guys how insane this is to me,
and i will forever be grateful for this time in my (un)life~
im horrible at wording my emotions in a way that makes sense i think but this is genuinely so wild thank yooooouuuuuuuuu
IMPORTANT PSA
it has been brought to my attention that a new twitter update has added some options under direct message settings for calls-
make sure to turn ON enhanced call privacy because otherwise it could SHARE YOUR IP to people you are calling on twitter
(「๑•₃•)「
sometimes i wish i wasnt a neet an had a big fancy office job that paid me tons of money so i could afford to buy a $10,000 vtuber model and do a ton of fancy events and stuff but then i remember how i used to sob in the floor every day before work.
i am so much happier now 🥹
happy new year!!!!
this year i aspire to actually have a schedule, reach out to people more and to show you guys more of my favourite games, despite how embarrassing they might be for me~
thank you for supporting me no matter what, i love you guys so much ♡♡♡
im so sorry for being sappy but vtubing is literally the best thing that has ever happened to me.♡
i love everyone ive met so fricking much. everyone is so genuine and nice and i feel like ive grown so much as an (undead) human being 🥹
thank you
ive been trying really hard to get over my social anxiety this year and meet and talk to new people and i think ive been doing really good 🤺 im really happy lately
(not with shopping or random people outside my house tho thats terrifying)
i uhm, this is very hard for me to say but pilaf has just passed away from a condition no one was aware of. even the vet was blindsided and started crying in front of me.
i miss u guys dearly but i am going to be taking a little break.
do you ever just feel guilty and anxious for no reason and feel the need to apologize everyone you talk to? like i just need to apologize i *need* to say sorry
(ó﹏ò。)
im really really sorry for being so inconsistent- im gonna try to go to the doctor soon for my sleep problems and constant fatigue. its making it really hard for me to talk to people, hang out with friends and stream.
i miss u guys. i miss my friends. i miss feeling functional.
apparently ive been on the hellsite for 2 years as of today, which means this was the day i finally broke out of my cage & started chasing my dreams♡
thank you to everyone who has supported this dead rats journey out of the sewers & into the happiest, craziest time of my life~
i am extremely devastated to announce,
cinder passed away while we were at an emergency vet, this is the last picture i took of her on the way there.
the vet had no idea what was wrong either and did their best to save he regardless.
im completely fucking heartbroken
im taking care of cinder (my bnuny), whos not eating still today, shes in bed with me. i really wanted to stream today but if shes not feeling better by tonight ill have to wait till i can figure out whats going on with her
i love this creature so much
i love horror, generally the scarier something is, the more full of horror and gore the more of a safe place is it for me.
ive tried to explain it so many times but horror gives me a place i can finally be scared and process the worst of my emotions in a safe environment.
what is the psychology behind this
the more fucked up an IP is, the more controversial, violent, gory, terrifying it is, the fandom is inversely chill and fun-loving
meanwhile the more cute, soft, wholesome, uwu smol bean it is, the more the fanbase is made of rabid cops
remembering how i first started reading chainsaw man because i saw someone cosplaying makima a ton and thought they were just cosplaying a scary version of kobayashi....
i still cant unsee it
i want to work on expressing my excitement and positive emotions better-
ive never known how to express when im really happy, excited or interested in something to other people so i literally just look/sound deadpan or uninterested when im actually overflowing with joy....
i had to go outside today in the sun with no coat/hoodie on and so i used a massive black umbrella to protect myself instead.
sunscreen does not work on me, i felt like an actual vampire🧍