David
@dmshoots
Followers
996
Following
179
Media
195
Statuses
2,575
IG - dm.shoots | Content Creator 🔞 | Red White Blue & Tattooed 🇺🇸
Joined July 2016
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“I’d never let my girl do Onlyfans. I dont want weird guys hitting on her”
Oh but you’re totally fine with her working a 9-5 where customers, other employees & maybe her boss say & do inappropriate shit around her in real life? Every day? For $15-20 an hour?
Ok bro 😂👍🏽
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Don’t be fooled by social media. I’m probably much cooler than you in real life too 🤷🏻♂️
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Idk who needs to hear this but...
Stop doing wife shit for guys who accuse you of cheating every time you go somewhere without them 🙃
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you’ll never do legendary shit if you’re always looking for average ppls approval
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If her nails cost 70 give her 0
I care about deep throats not pretty fingers 🙃
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Haven't seen any of those "Quit your job and make 6 figures from home!" people posting in a minute...
Well. We're all home now. Whats step 2 motherfuckers? 🤔
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I'm not saying I'm gonna start acting out cause I think the world is ending. I'm just saying there's lots of drugs I've never tried and a lot of buttholes I've never seen 🧐
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The only thing getting easier in 2020 is hitting the Unfollow button 💯
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Anyone trying to date me for OnlyFans? 🥺 I know god didn’t give me this 🍆 & these creative skills to just shoot content for everyone else & die 💀 I cook I’m clean I don’t smoke crack & I’ll blow out your back 🥰
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Maybe I’m just an asshole...
But sometimes I’ll see a 4 who won’t shut the fuck up about men hitting on her everywhere she goes and think:
“Ya that didn’t happen.” 😂🤷🏻♂️
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I'm gonna start reverse mask shaming.
"I'm NOT asking you again! Back the FUCK away from me with that face mounted bacteria farm!" 🚫😷
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Quit saying you “support” creators, artists and models if you don’t:
• Share their work
• Buy their content
• Tag them in Reposted content
• Buy their merchandise or art
You’re not supporting shit 😂 Say what you really mean. You like looking at pretty things for free 🙃
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IDK who needs to hear this but...
The new Call of Duty won't suck your dick after a long day at work and neither will your girl if you play Call of Duty more than you play with her.... 😂
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It’s my birthday bitches 😛 This year sucks but fuck it. 6 months left. Finish strong
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Happy International Women’s Day to everyone except girls who talked shit about SW-ers but started an OnlyFans when it became socially acceptable ☕️🐸
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Anyone who says "Money cant buy happiness" is right you cant buy emotion. But it CAN buy
Peace of mind
Stability
Good food
A safe home
Time for self improvement
Time to improve relationships
So if someone says money cant buy happiness they dont know what tf theyre talking about
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Haters watching me post heavily censored content on IG that they can’t report
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Apparently the term "Sexual Preference" is now highly offensive? 🤔
Anyways. My SEXUAL PREFERENCE is women with big butts, some tiddy, and daddy issues 🤤🙏🏼
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“Omg I would NEVER spend that much on my tattoos”
Oh sweetie. We can tell ☕️🐸
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IDK who needs to hear this but
If your significant other tells you who you’re “allowed” to be friends with, run bitch 🙃
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Stop telling the world so much about your personal life. Most people don't want you to be happy, they want a show. Remember that 🙏
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As someone who grew up with next to nothing, all while being constantly told: “Money can’t buy you happiness!”
Let me assure you, as someone who now can buy nice things from time to time, those people are all fucking liars 😂
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I haven't seen people this united since Pokemon Go first came out
#FuckRobinhood
#RobinhoodApp
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Follow this babe and creator 🙏🏼🙏🏼 The Pretty Kitty Club 😻 crop top available @
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My most toxic quality is I think all meals should be followed by dessert and I eat 5 times a fucking day 🙃
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Guys with your girl in your profile pic commenting on models pages...
What's it like being a whole ass clown 🤔😂🤡
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Bitches be like “I’ve been hurt before” then go back to their ex for the 9th time
Like damn girl I’ll bet you get hurt every day by your own stupid ass 😂
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“yoUrE SeLliNg yOur boDy”
... no... I’m selling an image of something “you” and your pervy ass husband who’s probably cheating on you in real life will never be within 1000 feet of Susan 🙃
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“Wow you used to be different...”
And you’re still the fuckin’ same 😂 Byeeee 😘
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“Are you gonna get a real job?” is such a strange insult attempt
I like money idc where it comes from you fuckin’ dork 😂
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April Fools should be canceled tomorrow on account of the last 12 months being the biggest joke ever
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Ya'll went from "defund the police" to "call the cops if there's more than 10 people eating mashed potatoes" real fuckin' quick 😂
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Strange opinion, 2020 made me a better person 🙏🏼 Can’t wait to see how much I level up in 2021. It’s a mood 🥰 Get with it or get ✨fucked✨
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If you report someone’s Thanksgiving gathering we are legally allowed to waterboard you with gravy while Christmas music drowns out the sound of your screams 🥰
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I always know Fall has arrived because I suddenly feel the need to find a wife 😂🙃🍂🍁
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I wonder how many hours of my life I’ve spent re-touching/editing assholes 😂🤔
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If you pull your mask down & move closer to yell at me about not wearing a mask, I don’t know how to explain that you’re actually much more dangerous to the general public than I am staying 6 feet away from everyone minding my fucking business ☕️🐸
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Ppl I see being judgy about nudity are crazy. Like yes ur right. Dr Kim shouldnt drop her Astrophysics class to cam 😂
But if u think girls buying houses w/ 💸 made from being hot online are better off flirting w/ their manager to get a $2 raise next year u can go fuck yourself🙃
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Anyone else go on Post-Depression Apology Tours?
Like, surprise! Me again! Sorry if it seemed like I hated you for days. Me love you long time 😘 I was contemplating all the ways in which life is meaningless and I’m a burden to your very existence 🤷🏻♂️🙃
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I now have different sweatpants for morning, afternoon and evening. I hate it here 🙃
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IDK who needs to hear this but...
That surgical mask riding shotgun on your rear view mirror is carrying more bacteria than your ex after pledge week 🙃
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Even if you're a diehard Democrat you've gotta admit, Trumps Twitter would be LIT right now 😂
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Dudes who post the "Your girl leaves the house wearing 'this' wyd..." photos, punch holes in the walls when they don't get their way.
Girls who comment that they would never disrespect their man that way, date the dudes who punch the holes ☕️🐸
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Is it, "butt stuff" or "butt-stuff"? I want this love letter to be perfect 👌
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I went from searching shoot locations in AZ to looking at how long I could live in South America if I sold all my shit, deleted social media and disappeared...
What’s that mean? Asking for me 🙃
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I get tested every 3 or so months for STI/D’s regardless of any concerns or symptoms & a guy at the gym tried making fun of me for it when I told him I had a Dr appt 🤔
Imagine being proud of not knowing if you have clean dick. What a weird flex 😂
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Fall weather makes me wanna do cute couples shit like, fuck in a pumpkin patch or whatever 🍂
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Ppl go from eating T-Bell McDonalds & 7/11 hot dogs to being Vegan eating blueberries & kale & start posting shit like: “Never felt better since I stopped eating meat 🤮🥩”
Was it meat Kristen? Or the fact you stopped eating like a drunk 9 yr old for the first time since college
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I told a girl I was busy working on my revenge body and she was like:
“Aw who hurt you? 🥺”
This year hurt me motherfucker 😂 2020 a ho!
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