lani ♡
@delanib_
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Joselyne 🩵. although slow and dangerous behind the wheel, can still serve a purpose.
Reeferside,CA
Joined November 2011
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Bought a bike today and named it Grayson (cause it’s gray) and took it on a nice 9 mile bike ride. I should’ve known by naming it after a male it would let me down 😈🤣
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It’s the Fourth of July I’m ready to pop these firecrackers. Don’t pop them on me. Where the police at? 🚔🧨
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I was so down about my weight last night, I vowed to myself to wake up early go to yoga then the gym.while I was on my way to yoga my car broke down on me at an intersection so, god was telling me to stfu and remain fat amen.
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I’m here to announce fudruckers has been torn down & pluckers is on the come up.
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Halloween is on a Saturday,Full moon and an extra hour? I don’t trust myself.
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In honor of mean girls 10th anniversary ima push someone In front of a bus. 😆
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High school VS 2020💕🥰
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Sometimes I get sad then I remember I have random men sending me money for no reason.
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I can’t believe I found Hercules almost a year ago looking so sad & helpless. Now he’s strong & so happy.I’m so lucky to have found him 😌💗
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The fact that Sam and I have been together for 8 years and he still opens the car door for me every day is
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I don’t know how y’all have pictures from 10 years ago! I deleted all evidence 😂
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What was your favorite Halloween costume you ever wore? 🤔
dressing up as post malone was fun but, sexy Patrick wins
What was your favorite Halloween costume you ever wore? 🤔
Was hard to pick, but gotta go with captain underpants 😎😂
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Y’all ever just sit in your car after you get home from where ever you were at ? Cause same. 🙃
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Just had someone message me saying they’d pay for feet pics and I just want y’all to know if you see me hustling out here mind ya business.
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Post Malone’s dad follows me on Twitter so we are pretty much married at this point 😋
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I really need to stop adding people on Snapchat when I’m drunk cause I don’t know half my Snapchat friends 🤷♀️
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If you kiss me while I’m asleep & I feel it I’m marrying you ASAP. No matter who you are.
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Men are so mean. I was playing hell divers with strangers I said one word they said “eww a bitch is in here” and kicked me from the game.
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Dear lord, I promise I will neve complain about working 6 days anymore just give me my job back 😥
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Once i was talking to a coworker about how I wanted tattoos but, was too scared to grow old and regret them. She said “You aren’t guaranteed a long life. don’t live your life worried about making mistakes and having regrets.” And it stuck with me.🌞
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Ya girl got pneumonia and a bad kidney infection you know what that calls for ? Tequila that shit will clear anything 🙈🙃
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Had to say see ya later to my brother this morning. 🥺🥺🥺It’s been a good run roomie. Make California your bitch
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As lame as it sounds, Hercules was my soul dog (watched a tik tok and it got to me okay). He truly was there for me when I was at my worst and always made me so happpy and truly was the best dog. He will forever have a huge spot in my heart. I miss him every damn day.😭
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The difference between My boyfriend and i is he ran 5 miles this morning before going to his 12 hour shift. I will run to the kitchen for snacks and binge watch true crime for 12 hours we are not the same
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Last night I got so drunk I threw up in a sams parking lot talking about how my ex (named Sam) deserves a sams membership for life because he’s so amazing 💀💀💀
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Someone stole my info and applied to hella jobs... I got the job at the Coca Cola factory and I’m just wondering if should take it.
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“Live your life” in French GOT THIS TATTOO TODAY AS A DAILY REMINDER TO STOP SWEATING THE SMALLS STUFF AND ENJOY LIFE TO THE FULLEST CAUSE TOMORROW ISN’T PROMISED DUDES 💗
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I’m not scared of the corona virus I’m scared of y’all and the way y’all are acting 🤯
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I had someone tell me. I hide my depression really well cause I’m so funny I said” friend.. that’s why I’m funny “
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I can’t stand when people continually complain about the same thing and don’t do anything about it. If you aren’t happy fix it man. Life too short to be upset.
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*at the doctor* nurse: “so how many times a month would you say you drink alcohol?” me: “ i would say like twice a week.” her: “ I would suggest taking it slow would you like a recommendation for a therapist ? NO LINDA
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So far I’ve learned that I should’ve started saving money along time ago. Interesting
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I don't get when people are in a long lasting relationship then break up with them and already have someone else 👀😡
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Asked Thalía if she would still be my friend if I was a worm and this was her response 🥰 I would prefer a yellow cage but we can get passed that.
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I should’ve known after i fell down the stairs at varsity on New Years that this year was going to be shit 😢
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Sam woke me up this morning to a $150 amazon gift card and a date planned for tonight💕 I don’t know what I did to deserve him 😂🤷🏻♀️
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