Just remembered a few years ago when I took my friends phone, went into his contacts and changed my name to Natalie Portman. A few days later I rang him and he answered, surprised but with real hope in his voice, “Hello... Natalie?”
Dropped my wallet in London’s trendy west end. A woman caught me up to hand it back. I thanked her profusely for her kindness. She said ‘maybe you wouldn’t have dropped it if you weren’t such a stupid c*nt’. I thanked her again and we parted.
Difficult to come to terms with the scope of my terror in the 10 minutes I just spent convinced I’d accidentally uploaded this image to my 5 year old son’s homeschooling reading class.
Never dreamed I’d get so close to one in the wild. But there she was. Her antlers still glistening with dew. It was a moment before she noticed me, or maybe that’s what she wanted me to think, but when we locked eyes, there was briefly a oneness, before she vanished into the fog.
In 2001, between Christmas and New Year, I went into a chip shop near Kentish Town. I ordered, then the man behind the counter said to me, "Nice Christmas? Lotsa this eh?", while making a wanking gesture with his right hand.
Me and a man I know just went to incredible lengths to pretend we’d not seen each other in a supermarket. At times balletic, at others deranged, it reached a near Mission Impossible level crescendo when he effectively clambered over a self-service checkout.
I'm so in love with you
I'll be forever blue
That you gimme no reason
Why you make-a-me work so hard
That you gimme no
That you gimme no
That you gimme no
That you gimme no
Soul, I hear you calling
Oh baby please, give a
In 2003 I interviewed Henry Hill, who Ray Liotta played in Goodfellas. He had security guys whose job it seemed was mostly to make sure he didn't drink. When I realised his water bottle was in fact full of vodka, he got me in a headlock and told me to keep my fucking mouth shut.
A definitive ranking of movie posters on buses gone wrong...
1. I, Frankenranken (2014)
2. Li Aen Oven Cant (2017)
3. The Worinelve (2013)
4. Whe Down E Down (2013)
5. Unsunsane (2018)
6. Fiftys Of Grey Hades (2015)
Your summer reading list is HERE!
Thrilled to announce the longlist for the
#GordonBurnPrize
, which prize celebrates the year's boldest and most exciting fiction and non-fiction.
Completely inexplicably I am one of only 838 people Ann Coulter follows on twitter. Hoping to auction, for charity, chance to direct message her telling her to fuck off.
I know being ‘look who my mate is’ guy gives off deeply unedifying fumes, but my friend Rebecca
@SELFESTEEM___
made the album of the year. It’s brilliant. She’s brilliant. And now everyone knows. Mad pride. Cosmic justice. 1st good news in 5 years?
On Tuesday we’ll say goodbye to my dad, Keith, a good man. He did things for people who needed things doing, and never by halves. If he’d known it’d be in a crematorium on the hottest day on record he’d have asked why we’re bothering. It’s because he is so deeply loved.
This book is fantastic. Fascinating and terrifying. Possibly the most beautifully written piece of non-fiction I’ve ever read. We’re all gonna go extinct lads!
“Hi, I’m Alice Cooper, nice to meet you”
“Brexit means Brexit”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“Brexit means Brexit”
“I don’t follow...”
“Brexit means Brexit”
“Are you okay?”
“Brexit means Brexit”
“Have you eaten? They’ve laid on quite the spread in the green room”
“Brexit means Brexit”
“I..”
This is the beautiful paperback cover of About A Son, by me. It tells the true story of the murder of the brilliant Morgan Hehir, and how his amazing father Colin dragged the truth into the light. Published April 20th by the mighty
@Phoenix_Bks
.
All use lockdown like an elongated Stars In Their Eyes. Pick a recording artist, completely devote yourselves to the transformation. Enter as you, worried and depressed. Emerge virus free as, say, Gloria Estefan.
The paperback of About A Son is out today. The more people know Morgan’s story, the better. I’m grateful that I got the chance to tell it. If you’ve read it, thank you. If you haven’t, please do.
One month until the paperback of ABOUT A SON comes out & the more people know Morgan's story the better. It was shortlisted for the Gordon Burn Prize, had some nice things said about it by some great writers (look) & you can pre-order it here (please)
2 years since this book came out. Sounds trite, but writing it changed me, and I still think the more people know Morgan's story, the better. So here I am, wanging on about it again. Please take a look if you can.
@Ffranciscodgf
@tristandross
Mid 90s, a bullshitting cousin of mine with his first Nokia showed me a contact listed as 'Gallaghers'. Liam and Noel on one number.
This is my new book, ABOUT A SON. It is the true story of the murder of Morgan Hehir. But it is not about his death. It's about his life, his family, their love, and his dad Colin's tireless search for the shocking truth... This was a murder that should never have taken place. 🧵
Not long 'til I stop wanging on about this, promise. But the paperback of my book is out next week. It tells the story of Morgan Hehir, his murder, and his dad's search for the truth. The more people know about Morgan, the better. Pre-order (please):
Here it is in the paper. A real honour to be alongside four brilliant writers.
Gordon Burn prize shortlist announced: jazz icons, true crime and a rogue psychotherapist
I'm so in love with you
I'll be forever blue
That you give me no reason
Why you make a me work so hard
That you give me no
That you give me no
That you give me no
That you give me no
Soul, I hear you calling
Oh, baby, please, give a
Hot off the press, finished copies of ABOUT A SON. This book tells the true story of the life and death of Morgan Hehir, who was murdered in Nuneaton in 2015, and his father Colin’s (
@Hairy007
) love, grief and search for the shocking truth… 🧵
Went to an open mic night once and a man stood up in a blue jacket and said “my jacket should give you a clue about what my jokes are like”, and someone at the back shouted “are they about jackets?” He never recovered.
This book is published today. Writing Morgan Hehir’s story has been an immense privilege. It’s an important one. I only wish that I had known him.
If you’d like to read the book, click here.
Ten years this week since my 1st book came out. A decade and over 27 copies sold later, I’ve just finished my 4th. ABOUT A SON, published April 2022 by
@Phoenix_Bks
.
🗡 THE ALCS GOLD DAGGER FOR NON-FICTION (3/3)
@alcs_uk
#CWADaggers
Michael Smith: The Real Special Relationship
Andy West: The Life Inside
David Whitehouse: About A Son
Shahed Yousaf: Stitched Up
If you've read my book About a Son, you'll know what a brilliant young man Morgan Hehir was. This is a beautiful photo of him fishing in Connemara, taken by his dad, Colin (
@Hairy007
).
Morgan Forever.
My earliest memory is of my drunken grandfather whispering into my crib while I slept that I'd never be number two in Israel's book chart. It makes this all the sweeter.
My dad loved the sea. After he died last year we scattered his ashes at Minehead harbour. In a remarkable turn of events, me, my brother and my sister now sponsor the webcam there, which we’ve renamed ‘Keith Cam’, because that would have made him laugh.
Anyone know how I get one of those insanely paid political cartoonist jobs?
JOHNSON AND CUMMINGS ATTEMPT TO BURY PIG OF PUBLIC ANGER UNDER BURNING SUN OF INTENSE MEDIA SCRUTINY
(Fuzzy Felt, 2020)
Google insists I’m a leading authority on Roman, Islamic and medieval glass. I don’t know anything about Roman, Islamic and medieval glass. Difficult to comprehend the kinds of scrapes this might get me in to.