samson (hrothgal era) 🌙
@coeurlclaw
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samson • 🇺🇸🇨🇱 • milk bread (ultros) • mooncat liker, court jester, heavensward boomer • BLM | ACAB • FREE 🍉 • popuko @niceinviting • i: @SirScarab
TWT/RT HEAVY • 🔞 • SPOILERS
Joined December 2016
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Pinned Tweet
miqote wol getting the zoomies like full on Big Pupils Ears Back Full-tilt Sprint down the royal promenade like. see that? That's the warrior of light . Savior of the realm. She's climbing up a curtain
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good morning to people with adhd. writers who haven’t written in weeks. gay men. depressed thots. dnd players. artists who are behind on commissions. stem majors. and sluts
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wish there was a term for “twitter mutual who ive only ever spoken to in passing but nonetheless i am extremely fond of them and wish them success and happiness”
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genuinely don’t know who needs to hear this but you need to stop recording strangers in public. the world is not your vlog material, retail and food service employees are not props for your tiktoks and one day you are going to get your shit kicked in guaranteed
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there is something so sexy, so alluring about a thief/detective pairing. the sexual tension. the love notes. the "better luck next time", the taunting, the absolute intimate thrill of the chase, the hours spent thinking of each other.... the flavor of it all
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you ever meet someone whose love for a character is so strong it actually makes you like the character more
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i think healers should have a skill that allows them to instantly kill any party member
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the “fuck it we ball” tank and the “but did you die?” healer
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some useful images for you guys to have on hand
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congratulations mr astley for getting one billion views on your immortal contribution to online culture. never let us down even for a second
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any combat gameplay that has things like “dodge” and “parry” has no use to me. as far as im concerned the only strategy that exists is to hit the thing before it hits you
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sending oc refs to artists is so embarrassing like yes this is a character i created as a partial expression of myself in the form of projection and personal goals both i am baring my innermost creation to you and trusting you to keep it safe. also can you make her ass bigger
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good morning to bisexuals, catboys, people who drive hondas, women, english majors, and sluts
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lifes too short to be embarrassed about your ocs. who cares. do it. make ur oc a long-lost princess with purple hair and magic powers. give ur oc pink eyes and scars. write unabashedly long backstories full of intrigue and drama. write love triangles. murder mysteries. have FUN
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in hindsight, the fact that it took the exarch like 5 tries to summon the wol because he kept grabbing the person standing next to them instead is incredibly fucking funny. keep rolling brother youll get that ssr one day
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me: wow the tanks hp is getting low whats the healer doing :/
me:
me:
me, remembering i am the healer:
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im convinced no one on tumblr has ever had sex ever
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in ffxiv they make you run arr content every day. even if you’ve already finished dawntrail
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you know what? i’ve had enough of you. (portrays you incorrectly in popular fanon)
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saving sex for marriage with my werewolf boyfriend, call that tying the knot
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i love catching people hardcasting veraero. you thought i wouldn’t notice. You thought i wouldn’t see your character shuffle two steps to the left to interrupt the cast. your shameful followup jolt. But i saw all of it.
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when only a tank and a dps survive a mechanic together that is tragic yuri i think. we are both going to die but until then i will do my best to protect you
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ok ffxiv doesnt need new players anymore. there is no free trial. leave.
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anyone who thinks unreadable carrds is a new phenomenon clearly missed the era of pastel pink 2px font marina autoplay tumblr about pages
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hydaelyn the heroes you chose to save the universe are standing in easily avoidable aoes
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hey btw i already used peloton so you dont have to use it again haha. i already pressed it we're already moving faster. you dont have to use yours too. i already used mine. you dont need to use your peloton
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wol disease is so real, ffxiv was just like “hey use me to create a guy” and everyone was like oh yay, a guy! i love my guy
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a baby bunny fell into my window well yesterday (and has since been rescued) and i managed to get a pic of it staring down bloob
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oh your boyfriend? sorry we sundered him into 13 shards. yeah no he’s fundamentally a series of different people now. yeah he’ll never remember the person he was before. sorry about that
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i can’t even properly articulate the sheer amount of disconnect and selfishness it takes to invade peoples privacy and cheapen the reality of their lives by turning the basic act of existing into entertainment value for clicks
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my question is WHO is collecting these aetheryte fees. is someone standing there like “oh, going to the edge of the universe? that’ll be 1528 gil. hand it over chump.” and i do. i do hand it over.
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i think every friend group should have at least one exhausted white mage, a thotty bard, a gay paladin, a leroy jenkins warrior, a lesbian dragoon main, an unhinged black mage and a summoner with a caffeine addiction
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final fantasy 14 has a variety of jobs you can play
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happy 11th birthday gaius van baelsar cake
The team celebrated a great
#FFXIV
showing at E3 and 1 million Beta sign ups w/ an awesome Gaius van Baelsar cake!
http://t.co/edSSTW8Kh2
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a tank's job is to direct all aggression onto them and take every blow to allow the rest of their party to perform optimally. due to the inherently submissive nature of this role, we can conclude the following: all tanks are bottoms. in this essay i will
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sometimes when i’m driving and get mad at other drivers i imagine urianger on my left shoulder like “prithee, mayhaps this driver is simply running late” and then emet-selch on my right shoulder like “you should kill this guy”
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people i know out here getting married... having kids.... and im just like... i wanna play final fantasy
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you dont have to defend yourself liking villains with some "morally grey" nonsense just say you wanna fuck him and move on!!! its ok to be horny!!!! you dont have to make excuses hes never gonna be a good guy you are just horny
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mmo culture is jumping up and down as a method of communication
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if i was lactose intolerant i would simply just start tolerating it
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Instant portrait reverted to default. Current appearance and/or gear does not match that shown in portrait.
Instant portrait reverted to default. Current appearance and/or gear does not match that shown in portrait.
Instant portrait reverted to default. Current appearance and/or
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“is cure 1 a viable skill at level 100” - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate,
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going into a new expansion is always incredibly funny because you go from being able to cheese Lv90 Wailing Embodiment Of Darkness And Despair to getting flattened by Lv92 Turtle
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ok, yes, new jobs, nice. existing job changes, cool. butwhen do i get access to the Grand Company Champion rank
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happy 6 years on T, king
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this weekend i collaged a poem of sorts based on some of the conversations i overheard around fanfest. each line was said by a different person at a different time.
so...
take care, and see you again
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square enix: oh fuck we need to develop this male character more (pulls out a gun and shoots nearest female character at point blank range)
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it’s not only disrespectful but also very dangerous to post identifying information about others online without their consent or knowledge. the sheer amount of entitlement that goes into prioritizing farming engagement over the safety of others… absolutely shameful
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not getting an instant queue as a healer is so maddening. dont you know who i am
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youve heard of the Mom Friend, now get ready for: the Chaos Friend
- all the time all the time
- does not accept criticism on their posts
- has been awake for 32 hours
- "hey wanna see me stuff 20 marshmallows in my mouth"
- powered by spite and horny
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evryone wants to talk shit on red mage til both healers are dead. coz whos gonna save you then?? the dragoon? the BLACK MAGE?? no. i raise the whole party in under a minute and the white mage dips me low and kisses me so sweetly
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Moogles will see a surly man in dark armor and say “is anyone gonna harass this guy” and not wait for an answer
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when i first started playing xiv I didn’t know about naming conventions and i distinctly remember seeing all the lore accurate suncats and wondering why all these catboys were my aunties
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i love watching people reluctantly put quest phrases in say chat. like yeah youre a little msq boy arent you. gonna complete your little quest? huh? get your little exp and gil reward?
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i was looking at apartment listings and can someone please tell me what is going on with this fridge
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the only thing better than two people jumping up and down together in an mmo is a whole bunch of people jumping up and down together in an mmo
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it only works when its gay. it has to be some slender little slip of a man and the burly detective out for his blood. it has to be a high femme who leaves perfumed notes with kiss marks for the female officer who stays up all night thinking about her
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really funny how squex went in and did all these amazing qol changes to early leveling dungeons but left aurum vale absolutely untouched. they said this is a rite of passage
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“if they keep putting wuk lamat in msq people will start quitting the game” god i hope so
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xiv needs emoji compatibility stat i need to be able to send 🤨 to my entire alliance raid at least once per run
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sprouts who hitch rides with their 2seater-owning friends are living the real passenger princess experience
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happy 10th birthday gaius van baelsar cake
The team celebrated a great
#FFXIV
showing at E3 and 1 million Beta sign ups w/ an awesome Gaius van Baelsar cake!
http://t.co/edSSTW8Kh2
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im sure this has been done before but heres MY take
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healers purposely letting disrespectful tanks drop to low hp is just a dom teaching their bratty sub a lesson. you can’t change my mind
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i don't think it's unfair to be annoyed by max level players who don't utilize the skills in their kit. i am always more than happy to guide and teach players who are new to the game or to a duty, but by level 100 i think its ok to expect players to uhhhh use their Buttons
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there’s nothing i love more than finding out the pink catboy i run dailies with works for like nasa or something. it’s kind of easy to forget that most of us are uhh working professionals. out of curiosity, what do y’all do when you’re not busy being the warrior of light?
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can someone please tell whoever makes bathtubs that there are real human adults larger than 5’4 who also enjoy baths
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can anyone tell me what is wrong with this image
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excuse me how did i not know about the official gaius van baelsar cake
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love how sprouts are automatically assigned baby role. doesn’t matter if you’re 45 years old with a job and kids the second you get that little green leaf above your head you’re going in the stroller
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for the most part i enjoy xiv players in regards to ingame expectations compared to other MMOs but the one thing i felt has gotten way worse is the expectation that if you don’t do new content On Patch Day you have to look up a guide or you’re ruining it for everyone else
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