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@brunchandbutts
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Robin Arryn got that โmy crazy ass mama died and I could finally get vaccinatedโ glow up
#GameofThrones
#DemThrones
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remember: youโre gwynnocent until proven gwylty
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man in my apartment from last night: โdamn ubers are like $40 right nowโ
me:
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i wanna gag
i wanna choke
i want you to touch that little dangly thing that swing at the back of my throat
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thinking about the time i let a j cr*w employee j*rk me off in the fitting room and i wasnโt sure where i should cum so i panicked and came in the coffee iโd been carrying with me
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me when i hear keys jingling in a bathroom stall
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listening to the guy i just ๐ use the bathroom
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now that weโre entering tank top & sandals season, a gentle reminder:
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my pronouns are te/he bc i be giggling ๐คญ
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collab idea: bey lures him into an elevator and solange whoops his ass
Chris Brown reveals that Beyoncรฉ is one artist heโs been wanting to collaborate with.
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in love w my new apartment ๐ (also which of you ๐ฌs is gonna **** me in the sh*wer??)
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Just signed a lease for a new apartment and we need to talk about how much sex Iโll be having in this shower
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BREAKING: Kim Kardashian has purchased a vodka soda at Splash for a reported $6, per TMZ
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get your fucking ass up and blackout on thursday night! it seems like nobody wants to blackout on thursday night these days!
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Grindr hookup: itโs so late mind if I just crash here?
Me:
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sheaโs workroom entrance alone should get her the crown... i mean, look at the material!!!
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deep cleaning my apartment makes me h worddd
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why are you, a friend with a pool, not inviting me, a friend who loves pools, over to the pool?? itโs a little weird to me is all iโm saying
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and a jury would acquit me
Coming out as hating grilled cheese and tomato soup, I canโt stay silent anymore idk how yall eat that
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a diverse coalition of folx support renaming b*ystown, but iโve noticed one demographic in particular seems to have a problem with it... iโll give you one guess as to whomst
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MTV: the hills is coming back!
me: THE HILLS ISNT THE HILLS WITHOUT LC
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me walking into the 7/11 across from charlieโs at 4am
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when everyone at the function knows you have a bag
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"Lana del Rey is doing a song with Stevie Nicks"
Me:
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oh you โlikedโ my instagram story?? grow up and kiss me on the mouth!!
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so Chicago night two got blue, hit the mute perfectly, and beyonce told them they did better during love on topโฆ
night one girlies should we just k word ourselves???
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โLast Nightโ by Morgan Wallen has been crowned Billboardโs song of the summer.
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If anyone in Chicago is looking to get the monkeypox vaccine there are A LOT of appointments available for next week and beyond here:
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ohhhhh my god youโre market days ready? should we tell everyone? should we throw a party? should we invite the ceo of equinox
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two years of waiting and the chicago chromatica date isโฆ a mondayโฆ stefani come outside i just wanna talk
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gonna reward myself with a weekend bender after a long week of doing nothing since my last weekend bender
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gays last week: โlooking for a queen ticket!โ
gays this week: โlooking for an eras ticket!โ
iโm like can you not be looking for a ticket for 5 minutes??!
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just saw a tiktok about two gays getting divorced and this came up and Iโ
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@katya_zamo
Reese, in the trampoline challenge you left us jumping for joy, but your look on the runway didn't make us hoppy...
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god gave me three holes for a reason
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one thing about me is iโm always gonna want a lil something sweet after dinner
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โwhat have you been up to??โ
my non-employed ass:
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i am *begging* some of you boystown f words to make non-white friends i promise you we donโt bite
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is science in the room with us rn
Harry Styles is ranked among the Top 5 most handsome men in the world, according to Science.
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so hereโs the dill, my fillings for you are rill ๐
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okay
@DamagedBttm
itโs your time to shine sis
Come on, letโs be honest... we all know someone who would try ๐ฑ๐คญ๐๐คฃ๐๐คฃ๐๐คฃ๐๐คฃ
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saw this earlier and laughed, then read a comment that said โblackplague in thou areaโ and absolutely fucking lost it
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went and s*cked a beautiful manโs d*ck and then got myself some sour patch watermelons as a treat - keeping myself blessed this evening!!
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