FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: HATERS IN DISBELIEF AS TAPROOT WIZARDS ANNOUNCE $30,000,000.00 SERIES A ROUND (REAL) (Mossad HQ, Tel Aviv) 2 years ago, the Taproot Wizards team inscribed the first 4MB block in bitcoin’s history with an image of a bald wizard. that historic event marked the generational bottom for BTC: in the 2 years that followed, tens of thousands of bitcoiners took a shower for the first time. the most notorious laser-eye maxis called it quits and shut down their podcasts. and the president of the united states of america posted a Taproot Wizards hat on his instagram account. “the $30,000,000.00 raised will allow us to bribe miners and rogue NSA agents to activate OP_CAT” said customer support intern Udi Wertheimer. “with bitcoin mempools clearing up, we would also use the funds to push more spam into the chain, to the benefit of all mining pools (except ocean)” “ok udi but we will also use it to gear up development efforts and make bitcoin magical again with new and exciting protocols based on OP_CAT” says eric.eth, aka Taproot Wizard #0002. “sure, that too”, udi adds. the round is led by @standardcrypto which is doubling down on its major commitment to the bitcoin ecosystem, joined by funds including @cyberFund_, @__geometry__, @ColliderVC and others. photos of the investors taking showers were not made available at the time of this release. 🔶🔶🔶 MORE NEWS COMING ANNOUNCEMENT 2 LOADING... 🪄 FOLLOW @TAPROOTWIZARDS AND TURN ON NOTIFICATIONS 🔔