Andrew Harms Profile
Andrew Harms

@andrewlharms

Followers
330
Following
60
Media
10
Statuses
64

Comedian

Joined April 2021
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
2 years
Tweet media one
3
7
42
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
The hardest part about being a bird trapped in a train station is having to ask a rat for directions.
1
4
36
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
Enjoying a nice rotisserie owl
Tweet media one
2
1
26
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
1 year
Hi everybody! I'm guest co-hosting the Wet Spot tonight with @Whatevah_Amy Check it out! @levincomedy @frankiemacd @CompoundAmerica and Vinny Scarpa!
Tweet media one
1
1
15
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
Hey folks! I will be guest co-hosting Wet Spot tonight with Xia Anderson. Check it out! @CompoundAmerica @ianimal69 @PlatanoQueen @Xia_Land @ThisKidAClown @frankiemacd
Tweet media one
1
2
10
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
I will be co-hosting with @REALMattMaran . Check it out!
@ChrissieMayr
Chrissie Mayr🇺🇸
3 years
TONIGHT! Wet Spot on @CompoundAmerica 4:30pmPT/7:30ET/ with @TheAliaJanine @newdalton69420 @REALMattMaran @mishoshakur & @andrewlharms ! Call in with your sex/dating/relationship questions (877) 962-6846
Tweet media one
4
8
23
1
2
10
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
So do we gotta cancel Hitler now?
1
1
9
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
I don't like the term "passion fruit." Do the other fruits not care?
1
0
9
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
1 year
I thought the One Chip Challenge was trying to eat just one Lay's potato chip.
1
1
10
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
2 years
Tweet media one
1
2
8
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
I'm a pretty intimidating guy, so when someone puts a knife to my neck and says, "Give me all your money!" I always give it to him because that takes courage.
0
1
6
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
I'm on my uncle's ranch, and I totally just saw a helium balloon come out of a well :(
2
1
6
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
2 years
0
0
4
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
2 years
If you say something with enough insecurity, people will think you're wrong. That's my move.
1
0
8
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
2 years
@frankiemacd I owe you 5 bucks.
0
1
5
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
People being like newspapers. EXTRA EXTRA!
0
1
5
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
Last night I got high and realized my girlfriend's period syncs up perfectly with the Wizard of Oz.
0
1
3
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
1 year
@FrankP614 Mi Abuelo. I love you!!
0
0
2
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
The tenth person to like this tweet gets a free t-shirt courtesy of 105.7 the Harmz.
1
0
4
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
If a woman gives birth, she should tattoo her signature on the child like a painter.
1
0
4
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
Hey, everybody! This Sunday at 8:00 pm, come watch the funniest comics in New York City come to Mcloughlin's Astoria Bar and make you happy to be alive! ...
Tweet media one
1
1
4
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
You know a monster truck rally is getting intense when the drivers get out of their trucks and start wrestling.
0
0
4
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
Safety tip: If you're about to skateboard, make sure you take your rollerblades off first. I know. It's tempting.
1
0
4
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
2 years
Extra Strength 5-hour Energy is really more like 6 hours.
1
0
2
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
2 years
You know you're in your thirties when you start throwing the dishes in with your laundry.
0
0
3
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
Hey, everybody! If you're in New York, come check out the funniest comedians perform at Mcloughlin Astoria Bar 3106 Broadway, Queens, New York 11106 this Sunday August 1st! It will be the best! #comedy #astoria #newyork
Tweet media one
0
1
1
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
I'm going to start throwing more hardware terms in my everyday speech. "You really bulldozed over my original plan which put a monkey wrench in my sprocket of an idea, you hammer!"
0
0
2
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
9 months
Hollywood keeps getting less imaginative with how they design Batman villains. Every meeting is like, "What if he's just a regular dude with a scar?" #Batman
0
0
3
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
9 months
@frankiemacd Great so far
0
0
0
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
I think it's ok for vegetarians to eat chicken wings because what are the chickens really doing with those wings?
0
0
2
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
Tweet media one
0
1
1
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
3 years
Any time I offer an old woman my seat on the train and she refuses, I stand up, put my backpack on the seat and say, "Now no one gets it!"
0
0
1
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
1 year
@SchurJeremyah You'll get there. It takes practice.
0
0
1
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
1 year
@REALMattMaran I made a fantasy football team of fantasy football players, and you're my #1 pick!
1
0
1
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
8 months
My pronouns are why/him.
0
0
1
@andrewlharms
Andrew Harms
1 year
0
0
1