@acidietz
Used to have a friend who watched gore bc they thought it was interesting, not for sexual reasons or anything just that it was “cool” to watch or something 💀
Moots fair warning, I may not be as active the next couple of days bc I keep binging. I’m gonna try to eat semi normally(?) for at least this weekend to hopefully fade away the urges ig. But dw I’ll still be on at some point everyday. Just wanna kms rn but ya 👍
I’m actually the most awkward person alive, I will stay dead silent irl until someone directly talks to me but even then I struggle to keep the conversation going 😭
I feel so out of place sometimes bc a lot of ppl on edtwt are fans of kpop but I literally know nothing about it or ever listened to a song from that genre 😭
I don’t like to talk abt my weight bc ik I’m big for edtwt but I’m literally less than 3 lbs away from being out of overweight jail that it’s like TEASING ME. OMG. LET ME OUT OF THIS PRISON
How to stop ppl from hating you and viewing you as the old fatty who hated everyone and everything (asking for a friend) (there’s no friend) (I’m asking for me)
Guys I’ve been maintaining for the past couple days and idk how when I get 10k+ steps a day, go to the gym, and eat under 700 cals
I’m blaming it on the fact I haven’t pooped in over a week
Sometimes I forget that I am diagnosed with depression and then come home to stacks of dishes and old food in my room 🧍♀️(I don’t have a doctor rn so I don’t have meds)
Sometimes I don’t even recognize myself, like I forgot I’m a human, my own person, like fym this isn’t the sims and I can’t just completely change how I look??
I was waiting to poop before weighing myself bc I didn’t want all that binge food weight in me but now the reality is kicking in and I’m scared I’ve gained
Guys I’m actually so shocked rn, like I ran and jogged majority of my first 2 miles, then I went on stair master for 10 minutes, and went back to do my last mile and I ran for 4 minutes straight??
New layout bc I’m officially locked back in moots 💪 fasted for 19 hrs, stayed within my intake, and got 16k+ steps today. I’m feeling a lot better today🤞
Any moots also unable to swallow pills? Idk why I just can’t do it, I have such a big fear of choking that no matter the size of pill, my body will refuse to swallow it 😭
My coworker said to me on saturday that she wished she looked like me or my other coworker (who is thinner than me) and I didn’t know whether to feel validated or upset bc I got to where I’m at in an unhealthy way 😭
I grew up in a very junk food centered household so it’s kind of hard to just immediately stop, glad I found lower cal options but I def want to strain away from the junkorexic lifestyle..
There was one treadmill space between us and we ended at the same time 🤭 she also wore an apple watch and had a ton of cute bracelets on!! She was actually the prettiest girl I think I’ve ever seen 🥹
I looked up girls kissing when I was younger on my mom’s phone and she saw the search history later and asked me abt it, I lied and she thought she got hacked 💀
Don’t ask how I’m doing, I’m grieving. Feel like I fucked up all my process. Not going to weigh myself for a couple days so I don’t actually kms or relapse
Since its August now I can officially say I was binge free for all of July 💪 there were so many times I thought I was going to break but somehow I powered through 😭