✨ wieiad ✨
Big fuck you ED day with the ice cream. I’ve been freezing all day despite the weather being beautiful, so couldn’t really taste the ice cream at all lmao
670cals
🩵
✨ wieiad as IP ✨
Unable to finish my meals bc I get so full, but I’m trying to eat a little more each day as a challenge. Tomorrow I’ll actually order proper meals and find one that I can somewhat enjoy during my stay 🙃
Bed rest ain’t fun gang!
TW: health scares and complications to do with anorexia.
Yesterday was a wake up call for me, I went on a five minute walk outside and that’s all my body could take before long I got a bout of severe lower back pain and tremors followed by-
✨ wieiad ✨
Wednesdays are always a difficult day with therapy and I struggle a lot more with guilt but didn’t allow myself to skip lunch and I also honoured a craving, I’ve had too many anxiety attacks over today so I’m tired but 2morrow will be better
864cals
✨ wieiad forced recovery ✨
Still restricting, I just can’t see myself fully recovered I’m fighting my mind and my parents constantly it just feels like a losing game atm and it’s making me not want to get better
Tomorrow I’ll be officially inpatient, I’ll likely be there for the rest of the year and I’m trying to accept that. This is my last chance to actively recover I hope I have the strength to do it as this is hell already
✨ wieiad ✨
Had a weetabix biscuit with a dash of almond milk warmed up with my yogurt and it tasted AMAZING, will definitely have that again 🥹
873 cals
✨ wieiad as IP ✨
Allowed small meals today, the normal portions are too overwhelming atm & I feel even more guilty when I waste food. Still stuck in temp ward and waiting to move into the official IP unit 🫠
Today has been a better day, still exhausting but better :))
✨ wieiad - inpatient meal plan style ✨
Never have I had such boring spreads lol, can’t wait to see how unhinged these become 🥲
It’s exhausting all I’ve done is cry and have panic attacks, scary times and too much FF, I just wish I had actively recovered sooner.
Est: 805cals
✨ wieiad ✨
Today has been hard being on bed rest as well with guilt and anxiety over anything to do with eating and the state my body is in now..
Forced myself to have an evening snack though so that’s my win for the day :))
✨ wieiad ✨
Work was lovely, but the parents have been screaming and threatening me about my eating habits, they have no idea that I do therapy every week and have checks but I think I’ll end up being forced into recovery otherwise, idk how to tell them lmao
829cals
✨ wieiad ✨
Idk I’m struggling so much with overwhelming guilt over sweet foods and not savoury, I’m trying to allow myself to have a treat but it’s hard lol
But today was really nice, the sun was SO needed 🥹
920cals
So I have an update, this is all so much for me and I’m at the point where I have no choice but to be tubed because eating alone is not enough to heal my heart.
Please, if you are able to, allow yourself the help you deserve you are so worthy.
Things will be changing this week and it’s terrifying, tomorrow is the start of a new journey for me and I’m going to fight my absolute hardest against my brain to try to repair my body.
✨ wieiad ✨
Today has been awful mentally, but the colours have made it easier. I was able to get out the house and grab some things and felt a little better.
Checkup & ecg 2morrow wish me luck lmao
647cals
✨ wieiad ✨
I skipped breakfast bc I woke up late, I shouldn’t have done that bc of the threat it has on my body. But I allowed myself 2 snacks today, it’s been a hard week with a lot of stress. I hope you’ve all had a good week 🙏
705cals
✨ wiead ✨
A good day today, felt a little weak and very short of breath while shopping but it’s been a lovely day 🫶🏻
I hope yours has been too!
1,003cals
✨ wieiad ✨
Forced to up my intake and feeling sick to my stomach, my favourite cousin came up to me and was the first reasonable person to really listen and hear me today after this harrowing time away lol
978cals