G☻D
@______4L5
Followers
510
Following
21K
Media
799
Statuses
6K
Just to clarify, the note is from his gf and is supposed to read as “I get to hit you whenever I want.Love, Stephanie. Sign here:________ “.
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This is also my mom’s boyfriend’s kids room, he is sleeping in another room with my brother and let me sleep in his room - simply put, I am not a pedophile.
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@b57edc He looks like he would use telekinesis to make my tiny brain explode and then use it as scoby for his next concoction.
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Taking a break
I’m going on a selfie strike.
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Getting my lips done at a new place and they have a lump of fat dressed in a bikini
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One time this restaurant said they would accommodate Corey being vegan and gave him this “soup”
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Should I be worried if my boyfriend said he’s going to “watch Basketball with the boys” and then proceeds to slip poppers into his pocket.
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I’m putting everyone that replies/qts with “real ones know” in my s****** note.
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Le epic awesome sauce bacon vibes.
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Girls in bushwick will be like omg I have to have this!! And it’s like knitted earth tone arm warmers w bedazzled crosses on them.
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What is beautiful about this.
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??.
Excited to announce that I'm the new brand ambassador for @Neopets! My family and I have been long time fans of the game, and I can’t wait for you to experience it too. Looking forward to more adventures together!
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I always give my grandma my favorite ones I decorate and she always says Annie do you think I give a fuck, I’m just going to eat them anyway
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This girl came into my work because she tracked her boyfriend down and started screaming at him saying he shouldn’t be buying jeans when he lives w his mom and said she’s going to post his social security number and address on Facebook again.
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Took these the week I broke two wine glasses by talking with my hands
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Sometimes life truly amazes me, like when you pick up a bottle of dish soap and little bubbles float into the air.
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Beaver on beaver call that lesbian porn (I’m living with two lesbians at the moment and this is a beaver coat)
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Inshallah I will not get murdered, raped, or shot tonight at the Christmas market
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I can’t believe there’s only 2 episodes of gossip girl left and literally nothing has happened.
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This sucks sorry.
it reminds me of this one named "Just Take Them and Leave Me Alone" by Raoof Haghighi. it also makes me so fucking sick
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Turkey on ciabatta with jack cheese jalapeño caramelized onion Mayo mustard and a little avocado
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Went to the restroom at Taco Bell and someone used the baby changing table to roll a blunt.
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Finally talked to my dad last night for the first time in 15 years, which was weird, but he did say his friend owns 3 homes in Hawaii that I could stay at whenever, so does anyone wanna go to Hawaii.
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Does anyone else have to watch this every time it pops up on your timeline, I can’t stop watching it
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Dream blunt rotation.
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An adderall xr I crushed up 10 years ago looks like this mark I have on my dresser which also looks like this pic of Cinderella… thoughts?
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Guy just came into my work with the last name wigger and it took everything in me not to combust when I was ringing him up.
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I love my reply guy that only replies to my story when I use the pee filter
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This is my bf, he is shy, but sometimes he acts up and I have to bark at him 🙄
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If we noticed you across the bar and really dug your vibe, would you sit with us?
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Women cannot be president because they will get their period and start a war
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If we were at war and our opposing side made an announcement saying they need someone to confidently sing all of ceelo green’s fuck you or they would bomb the country I would politely decline but deep down know that I would have the ability to do so regardless.
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Moving back to Phoenix so I can work at Breakfast Bitch which is a breakfast restaurant where everyone calls you bitch.
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A few years ago when I went to la and had just watched the sex and the city episode where they made flirtinis so I convinced my friends to drink them with me then threw up on myself
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Three years ago today I was the maid of honor at my friends wedding, but decided to get lip injections the day prior, so my lips were extremely bruised the day of the wedding, and I also got period blood on the back of my dress - they are divorced now
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