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Matty

@_MattyyAllen

Followers
87,646
Following
55,182
Media
2,645
Statuses
25,497

Hartlepool, England
Joined May 2012
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
1 year
Pretty mental seeing the northern lights out your back window
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
"Kim K's bum is real" http://t.co/aVAEGvlZ1p
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
you know winter is here when... http://t.co/yGbaPHZky6
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
When Gemma Collins drives past McDonald's but doesn't have time to get anything http://t.co/COUoBwFUyE
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
9 years
#WhyImVotingUkip because then I might have a chance of getting into the UK 4x100m relay team
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
This is easily the funniest thing i have read in ages http://t.co/mnoTuBZA
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Absolutely brutal 😂 http://t.co/imAolKKXf0
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
3 years
Gunna send this to the FA
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
Let's just take a second to appreciate the Matte black Audi r8 http://t.co/0U6uZ7o5FY
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
This school would be awesome http://t.co/CEd9jicP
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
9 years
Tories got in because too many working class people seem to think they're upper class
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Don't get attached to anyone
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
1 year
Maneskin have been the best I’ve seen on Glastonbury yet
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
"People are awful for commenting on gGmma Collins' weight" ... http://t.co/y3Z1chIsUH
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
I used to do this http://t.co/brCfulJ5
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
When I don't get my own way http://t.co/tQ8u2x9sOz
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
2 years
@Robwarren348 @acechhh Apart from the fact you can see they’re literally in a shadow
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
9 years
Don't understand why people with nice girlfriends cheat on them with minging people 😩
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
#IfItWereUpToMe They'd test on rapists and paedophiles instead of animals.
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
scene from charlotte crosby's new fitness dvd http://t.co/LWcXzW1blZ
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Overload generation... http://t.co/J2AOQ5Z4xq
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
8 years
Me when I'm driving and someone pulls out on me
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
#WhyImVotingUkip one time I got food poisoning from a kebab
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
I'm at the point now where I'm surprised if someone actually doesn't ignore me and replies 😂
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
7 years
Hope Sam knocks Chris the fuck out in love island tonight
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
When nobody mention you in #Mention20GoodLookingPeopleOnTwitter and you're like http://t.co/buVcol1g
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
Gail Platt go home http://t.co/Bi8wPHsA
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
#RejectedOlympicEvents Pin the Smile on Kristen Stewart
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
I can't breathe 😂😂 http://t.co/ffXxRPRHm8
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
I wish I had one of these buttons on my keyboard http://t.co/Ju0Tt7pQ
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
9 years
My cousin and his wife are on their honeymoon and someone done this for them. Faith in humanity restored http://t.co/euTo0AAuev
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
No worse pain as a kid :( http://t.co/O49VI1B3Xs
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
Wow this is friendship http://t.co/8XQ5zheadE
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
2 years
is old age being tired before 9 every single night
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
9 years
The amount of people saying they're voting UKIP is worrying
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
What the fuck is this? http://t.co/shMlP2ETzG
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
basically this is how I start all my sentences. http://t.co/whTtsnBB
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
People like this need to exterminated ✋ http://t.co/83Qv57P82k
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Them comments though 😂 http://t.co/BMjRRhZClp
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
Jimmy Savile the movie http://t.co/wswIIPwv
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
iPhone battery life is amazing, only charged my phone 4 times today
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
What most of you look like with this hair cut http://t.co/lotKC6aZT5
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Is Michael kors the only available designer watch these days 🙈?
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
I hope this is a joke 😂 http://t.co/AT45BCIbnd
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
HAHAHAHAHA I CANT BELIEVE SHE JUST FELL DOWN THE STAIRS HAHAHA MADONNA YOU FOOL
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
My parents clearly didn't love me http://t.co/wVGRxLDwn1
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
If I had £1 for every time my mam moaned I could probs afford to live on my own and not have to listen to it
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Reminded me of Randall from monsters inc http://t.co/JKaGyd0htC
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
A 90's kid will remember this... http://t.co/kn3QmqCY
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
the only thing im seeing is pedo hahahaha http://t.co/M7XcwGZaQB
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
This is terrible just reading this upset me #SelfHarmAwarenessDay http://t.co/nSnvxfNnGV
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
If Kim kardashian had tattoos... http://t.co/XATvWOXGyA
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
I found this a lot funnier than I should have http://t.co/WhX8wKCkoL
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
10 points to gryffindor http://t.co/LeZqXUgVpR
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Probably should have looked at the chair I bought for Leeds before I got it http://t.co/dT7dQJgAwJ
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
"It's too early to be excited for christmas" http://t.co/iOj5l3tF
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Omg I'm fucking dying here
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
I FUCKING HOPE THIS IS TRUE http://t.co/sKUzzra7El
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
8 years
When you walk past your ex
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
I love Tesco mobile http://t.co/v3ZCjhSL1P
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
It's a minion onesie 😂 http://t.co/FTY9BAGMhU
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
one of the best status' I have ever seen http://t.co/8RCjjWD5w6
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Why hashtag "girlswithtattoos" you have 1 tattoo and it's a fucking tramp stamp
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
This is me always idk why http://t.co/B11MAlEXCm
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
I always do this http://t.co/PvFmDjhN
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
If you ever feel ignored just remember will smith has a 21 year old son named trey smith http://t.co/dell8FyH6s
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
Yeah i'm fucking dying http://t.co/qJslcp3Rry
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
hope you don't forget your passport http://t.co/HnQEhblLwE
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
12 years
This is why Shrek is awesome http://t.co/ZGv192QP
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
#TipsForYear7s you don't need 90% of the things in your bag
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
9 years
"Slang" is short for "Short Language" im fucking mind blown
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
Are relationships that bad these days that people feel the need to have 1 month anniversaries?
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
Can't fucking breathe http://t.co/6ZZcAqieCZ
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
#WhyImVotingUkip because ikea one time sold me a broken clock
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
10 years
This shoe looks like the page hasn't finished loading 😂 http://t.co/B8OudM1YNC
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
11 years
I want a friend who would be this loyal http://t.co/aLkmNn0rTf
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
6 years
It’s strange that they’re all making Alex an outcast because he actually has a respectful job #loveisland
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
8 years
It's soul destroying waking up thinking you have ages to sleep but when you check the time it's only a minute before your alarm
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
8 years
I felt as uncomfortable watching big brother as what Calum looks
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@_MattyyAllen
Matty
9 years
My sister just came up on tinder... 100% sure she has a boyfriend 😑
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