Just disconnecting from our phones won't reconnect us. We have to relearn the skills that have atrophied from 20 years of not having to use them: Truly seeing, hearing, understanding, and supporting the person in front of us.

People don't commit to and stay in relationships—at work or in our personal lives—because of what they "get." They commit and stay because of how they feel. Nothing can compensate for feeling unseen, unheard, and unvalued in daily interactions. Each moment you seek to understand someone, truly listen, affirm someone, and invest in someone matters. Slow down and show up.

Leaders: Your people don't need more well-being programs, perks, or surveys—they need YOU. New data shows 39% of people don't feel that someone cares for them as a person at work. Just 30% feel that someone encourages their development. Engagement is about relationships.

As difficulty grows, so must your purpose.

If you “don’t have time to get to know people” you don’t have time to be a leader. What we “don’t have time for” we don’t actually value.

Explore before you evaluate. When you're in "evaluation mode," you seek certainty and closure through judgment. When you're in "explorer mode," you seek understanding through curiosity. Evaluation without understanding is also known as ignorance.

Punish and threaten, and you’ll get compliance. Inspire and empower, and you’ll earn commitment. Commitment endures.

Great coaches see the person before the player. Great teachers see the person before the student. Great leaders see the person before the employee. What a great example of mattering-centered leadership:

Sometimes, the harder we try to matter, the more we forget that we already do. Your presence, attention, actions, and words are already significant to someone. Learning to see and believe that truth is the foundation of thriving.

RT @FlettGordon: Amazing quote and entirely in keeping with the growing body of research of research showing an exceptionally strong link b…

And by the way: Platforms, programs, perks, and money can't "respect" people. People respect people. It all comes back to the skills of seeing, hearing, and valuing people. #mattering

It still amazes me how much anxiety and overthinking subside within 10 minutes of actually doing the thing you've been obsessing about.

Be the reason someone remembers they matter.

Great leadership is a choice. It’s choosing to dignify, not degrade; to lift up, not diminish; to motivate, not manipulate; to inspire, not discourage. Above all, it’s choosing to regenerate rather than extract human energy.

RT @tom_peters:

@tom_peters @Jonhess98 @FlettGordon Funny, I just commented. Glad we're all connected on this!

@tom_peters Also, my favorite is a T.S. Eliot line: "To be of importance to others is to be alive."

Fulfillment isn't the outcome of living an easy life. Fulfillment is the outcome of living a connected life. Connect with others, connect to a purpose, and connect to yourself.