Happy anniversary to the woman who’s given me the greatest 3 years of my life! Looking forward to many more of climbing, playing games, singing, and telling lots and LOTS of stories together. 💖💖💖
Due to recent events, I’ve communicated to the people at Sequester that I’m no longer okay with them using any of my music or associating my name with them in any way.
Thanks to you, I stopped writing music entirely for almost a year because I became so embarrassed and unconfident. I appreciate that you never meant to hurt anyone, but I want you to know that you took away one of the only things in my life that I felt good at and made me happy.
The season feels a whole lot better now that everyone has actually EARNED the merge, not like those other 40 seasons where people got to merge without pushing a big ball through the dirt
#Survivor
@ParamountScares
@ScreamMovies
Firing Melissa just because she said there should be a ceasefire is morally reprehensible, and I will never be watching another one of these movies.
Last week, a woman at my job sent out an email to 200 people announcing that she’s starting a game where every day she’ll send out a picture she took of a duck and people get points for how fast they identify it. I thought “what a strange thing to mass email”. Anyway I’m winning
It is with a heavy heart that I announce that I’m discontinuing my services for custom song commissions indefinitely. I’ve had so much fun over the past year doing this, but my anxiety over unfulfilled requests has grown to an unhealthy level in the past couple of months.
I’ve been dating
@JPasette
for 10 months and she just realized
@robcesternino
was actually on Survivor, she literally thought he was just a huge stan until now 😅
I still love the online communities I’m a part of, but my life got a lot better once I stopped assigning so much of my self-worth to how important I was in those communities
I wish I could personally thank everyone who replied to this tweet, positivity is so hard to come by online and the negative comments always stick with you ten times longer. Please continue making the RHAP community one where everyone feels welcome.
It was an honor getting to write a song for the
#Sequester
premiere! Thanks to
@SequesterAccess
for the opportunity and much congratulations on the fantastic episode. If you liked the end credits music, you can download it for free here:
Update: I’ve been removed from the email distribution because I’m too far ahead and making the game less fun. This is a great injustice in the competitive landscape of duck identification.
Last week, a woman at my job sent out an email to 200 people announcing that she’s starting a game where every day she’ll send out a picture she took of a duck and people get points for how fast they identify it. I thought “what a strange thing to mass email”. Anyway I’m winning
Yesterday at the pizza spot we go to every week, me and my girlfriend’s favorite waitress wrote her phone number on our receipt so we could let her know if we ever wanted to hang out. This was the sign I needed to know the world is healing 🥲
#BB23
has two things that Big Brother has lacked for far too long:
1) strategic women who know what they’re doing
2) those smart women not targeting each other
and it feels too good to be true 😭
CONGRATULATIONS to the Squirtle Squad for being voted the people’s favorite OG Pokémon! I had a lot of fun running this tournament, and might do more in the future. Now enjoy these pictures of the champion!
For the record, the real reason I left early on
#RAANAP
this week is that I needed to go use the bathroom and Akiva was taking too long to decide on his coin flip choice
@tilianpearson
@DGDtheband
Well this is about the worst response possible. Went from apologizing to the sexual assault to denying it ever happened. I will no longer be listening to anything you or your complicit bandmates have ever created or will create.
Did anyone else experience technical difficulties watching last night’s
#LoveIslandUSA
? I got to the part where Mercades said “I want you to know I’m a freak for daddy” but then my TV caught on fire.
@robcesternino
@Keev26
Season 3 Episode 7 of Spongebob Squarepants. It's a really fun episode, and I bet a ton of your listeners grew up watching it. I think it'd be a blast not only talking about an episode, but also learning about the history of the show with a guest (((me)))
Good thing “I didn’t realize until now but broccoli is just a bunch of small trees” is something that JD is likely to say completely unprompted
#Survivor
My favorite feeling is the dopamine rush I get when I think I recognize an actor from a very minor role in something I haven't seen in years, and I look it up and I'm right
My dad, a doctor and Tr*mp supporter, told me we’re statistically more likely to die from getting struck by lightning than of COVID-19. Take that, liberals!
Confession: I’ve always heard Big Brother Canada 6 was a great season, but I still haven’t watched a second of it because I’m so mad about the
@kirstensaidwhat
situation
I want to say for all my followers to hear: Tilian Pearson has had multiple sexual assault allegations lodged against him, and his bandmates in Dance Gavin Dance are complicit with his behavior.