Shoot: Trump Bans Pronouns In Bios And Now Single People Have To Date Someone To Realize They're Crazy (Day 24 of submitting my application to @The_Kyle_Mann to work at @TheBabylonBee)

Pfizer Delays Cancer Treatment By 5 Years To Allow COVID Vaccines To Work Their Magic (Day 33 of submitting my application to @The_Kyle_Mann to work at @TheBabylonBee)

Elon Musk Updates X Algorithm To Detect Demon Possession Using Kanye West's Posts On X (Day 33 of submitting my application to @The_Kyle_Mann to work at @TheBabylonBee)

@ColtonBlakeX @patriot1968GTO @XrpDw @dresd30451 @Jonnyfourshirts @raymondbeckerr @stockseller07 @InstaMntalMasta @MundusInsanus Boooosted 👻 🇺🇸👍🏼

Argument To Keep Paper Straws Falls Apart In Seconds (Day 33 of submitting my application to @The_Kyle_Mann to work at @TheBabylonBee)

@ColtonBlakeX Good night!

@ColtonBlakeX I like turtles 🐢

@ColtonBlakeX You should change your name to Coach Colton!

@ColtonBlakeX @IWontBeWoke @okyall55 @ForHisMercy777 @PamParke1 @AskKevinQuinn @my2cents517657 @linda_emma27 @MummuAmi Done-zo ✅👍🏼🇺🇸

Politicians Without Fully Developed Pre-Frontal Cortex Decide Teenagers Don't Need One For Making Decisions Either, Because, Like, Duh! (Day 32 of submitting my application to @The_Kyle_Mann to work at @TheBabylonBee)

@ColtonBlakeX @realChrisBubbaC @AbbyBane13 @grote54765 @ltacotime @10klakes @PatriotOnX1016 @TammyMo17538311 @RealGavinT Got em all! ✅👍🏼🇺🇸

@ColtonBlakeX @DustyBuns37 @Headlines_Fix @BeAngieP @JMeisner1820 @stingray75bc @ThomasPalmetto @KevinRuhaak @1776yensid Done and done ✅ 👍🏼🇺🇸

@ColtonBlakeX Good morning to all the people it's morning for

Ouch! Trump Grades The U.S. Department Of Education And Gives Them An 'F' for "You're FIRED!" (Day 32 of submitting my application to @The_Kyle_Mann to work at @TheBabylonBee)

@mahakal You're in luck

@ColtonBlakeX Source?

@The_Kyle_Mann The masculine longing to own a sword that glows whenever orcs are near

@TheBabylonBee But the Bee is American...

@imotivate4life

@ColtonBlakeX If you're offering...I know you did one for me already, but if you have room, I would appreciate it!

@WallStreetMav Boom