Mandy Hale
@TheSingleWoman
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I am @MissMandyHale . Helping women - especially single women - reclaim their power one tweet at a time. My latest book Turn Toward The Sun is available now!
Nashville, TN
Joined February 2010
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May: Be a month of boldness. Of stepping into our worth & reclaiming our power & evolving past bare minimum effort, people, & relationships. May we be so confident & rooted in who we are that we unapologetically say thanks but no thanks to anyone & anything not on our level. ✌🏻
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You deserve someone who can’t WAIT to talk to you & spend time with you & get to know you & fall in love with you. Please stop settling for halfhearted & lukewarm & hesitant & indecisive. It’s sooooo much better to be alone than to be with someone who makes you FEEL alone.
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Life is short. Tell people you love them.
And stop wasting precious time on people who don’t love you.
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Baby girl, please understand:
If he’s causing you to lose sleep,
If he’s turning you into a private investigator trying to figure out what he’s doing behind your back,
If he’s stealing every last bit of your peace & joy...
HE AIN’T IT.
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If a man has to “think about” whether or not he wants to be with you...he doesn’t want to be with you. Please stop letting him waste your time & move on with your life. You deserve someone who is sure of you & can’t wait to make you theirs.
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Ladies. HERE IS THE THING. If a man wants to be with you, he will be with you. You won’t have to jump through hoops. You won’t have to complete obstacle courses. You just being YOU will be more than enough.
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If God didn’t bring it...I don’t want it. Who’s with me?
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Please hear me:
It is SO much better to be alone
than to be with someone
who makes you feel alone.
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Please understand that you will never have to instruct the right man how to act. You won’t have to ask him to show up for you or meet you halfway or put in effort. You won’t have to do all the planning & calling & texting & orchestrating of a relationship that’s meant for you.
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In 2020, let’s be bold enough to set standards for our lives and to say “thanks but no thanks” to anyone or anything that doesn’t meet them.
Let’s stop apologizing for not settling, for expecting the best, & for wanting to be treated with dignity & respect. Yes?
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Not everyone that comes into your life is meant to be a “great love.”
Or even a love at all.
Sometimes they’re just there to get you ready for it.
So release everyone with peace when it’s time for them to leave...
Because if they weren’t your destination,
They were preparation.
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Not everyone that comes into your life is meant to be a “great love.”
Or even a love at all.
Sometimes they’re just there to get you ready for it.
So release everyone with peace when it’s time for them to leave...
Because if they weren’t your destination,
They were preparation.
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A relationship prayer that has never steered me wrong:
1) God, guard my heart throughout the course of this relationship.
2) Show me anything I need to see about this person that I might be blinded to.
3) Remove this relationship completely if it isn’t in Your will for my life.
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Sometimes you need to thank God for what didn’t happen.
Thank Him for the things He stopped that you knew nothing about.
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if someone wants to be with you, they’ll be with you. If they want to text you & call you & love you & marry you...they’ll do those things. And if they don’t, they won’t. And no amount of asking or begging or bargaining or chasing or hoping or wishing will change that.
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You deserve better than someone who doesn’t return your love. You deserve better than someone who ghosted you or cheated on you or broke up with you. You deserve better than someone you have to ask to love you. It’s time to let go of everyone who has already let go of you 🙌🏻
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The right one for you will love you right where you're at.
The right one for you will meet you at your level.
The right one for you will encourage you to grow.
That's how you'll know.
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If a man wants to be with you, he’ll be with you. Bottom line.
If a friend wants to hang with you, they’ll hang with you. Bottom line.
No one is THAT busy.
If you keep getting blown off & brushed off & ghosted & canceled on, it’s time to release that person & move on.
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When God removes something or someone from your path or tells you no or seems slow to answer, it’s only because He can see what lies ahead & He knows the end before the beginning even happens & He has a better plan for you than you have for yourself.
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Please understand:
If he’s causing you to lose sleep,
If he’s turning you into a private investigator trying to figure out what he’s doing behind your back,
If he’s stealing every last bit of your peace & joy...
He is not the one for you.
Period.
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You deserve to be someone’s first choice. You deserve to be cherished & not taken for granted. You deserve to be chosen & not settled for. Never forget that. ❤️
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Love has not forgotten you. It hasn’t lost your address. God hasn’t forgotten you. Everything meant for you will come in His perfect time, in His perfect way. So celebrate the beauty & the wild unknown of your single season...bc just like anything else, it won’t last forever.
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Avoiding certain people to protect your emotional health is not a weakness.
It’s wisdom.
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At the end of the day...let it all go.
The mistakes.
The disappointments.
The rejections.
The feeling that you just didn’t quite measure up.
You did enough. You said enough. You ARE enough.
Go to sleep in peace.
Tomorrow is a fresh start & a blank slate.
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In 2020, we are setting high standards and not apologizing. We are loving ourselves the way we want to be loved. We are teaching people how to treat us. And those who can’t rise to our level, are getting left in our dust. Unapologetically.
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Closure is a myth. The way people leave you, the way they exit your life, the way they leave their relationship or connection with you...is all the closure you need. Find clarity in actions, not words.
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Avoiding certain people to protect your emotional and mental health isn’t weakness. It’s wisdom.
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Someday you will understand why that door didn’t open or that person walked away or the answer was no. And you’ll thank God that He didn’t give you a yes that would have led you away from His best. 🙏🏻
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Until a man finds himself, the only thing he’s going to bring to your life is chaos & heartache & confusion.
Don’t try to be a compass. Let him go find himself, THEN come find you.
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Eventually you have to love yourself enough to walk away from people who don’t love you enough. And don’t look back.
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If someone loves you,
REALLY loves you,
They love all of you.
The good & bad, the dark & light, the beautiful & the ugly.
There is no part of you they will run from.
They will stay & fight,
With you & for you.
Because love shows up.
Love perseveres.
Love is ALL IN.
Always.
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As you begin to love yourself more, you will start to see that not everyone is worthy of your time, energy, and attention. It’s okay to be selective about who & what you allow into your life.
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Consider this: Maybe you haven’t found a man yet because God knows you’re not ready for him. Or he’s not ready for you. Or you have your eye on someone who is unworthy of you and of the gifts you bring to this world, and God loves you too much to allow you to settle.
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Some people have to break your heart because it’s the only way you’ll be strong enough to let them go. Someday you’ll thank them for that heartbreak that saved you from a lifetime of brokenness spent with the wrong person.
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If a man has to “consider” whether or not he wants to be with you...he doesn’t want to be with you. Please stop letting him waste your time & move on with your life. You deserve someone who is so sure of you, they can’t WAIT to make you theirs.
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Please understand that when someone acts like they don’t care...they genuinely don’t care. This is a painful realization, but also a freeing one. Give yourself permission to STOP. Stop texting, stop asking, definitely stop begging, stop seeking endless “closure” & just...let go.
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September: May you be a month of releasing the old & embracing the bold. Close doors I’m not meant to open & open ones I’m meant to walk thru. Set me free from fruitless endeavors & relationships. Help me let go with grit & move on with grace. If it’s not meant for me, take it.
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It’s okay to be exactly where you are. You are precisely where you need to be at this moment, even if it doesn’t feel like it “fits” with other people your age. It’s okay to be a late bloomer. After all, late blooming flowers are often the sweetest...often the most beautiful.
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Chased love isn’t love. Forced love isn’t love. Manipulated love isn’t love. Begged love isn’t love. You have to get to the place where you love yourself too much to convince anyone to love you.
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Sometimes people have to break our hearts because it’s the only way we will be strong enough to let them go.
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When you raise your standards, only the boys will walk away. The men will rise up to meet them.
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I’m not going to talk ANYONE into being around me, working with me, hanging with me, loving me. I’m just going to move on with my life. I know my worth & I know what I bring to the table & I’d rather eat alone than with someone I had to beg or convince to be there. 🤷🏼♀️
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Never underestimate the power of singleness, solitude, & doing whatever the heck you want 😎
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When it’s the right one, nothing can push them away. When it’s the wrong one, nothing can make them stay. Either way, you’ll be okay. You are enough for whoever walks into your life & you are more than enough to not be shaken by whoever walks out.
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Someday you will understand why that door didn’t open or that person walked away or the answer was no. And you’ll thank God that He didn’t give you a yes that would have led you away from His best.
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Give yourself permission to evolve. You don't have to stay in any relationship, job, or situation that no longer fits you.
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A man of character will tell you if he doesn't want to be with you. He won't play games with your heart or ghost you or keep you around as a backup plan.
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Thank you,
@GMA
, for including me on your top ten list of inspirational Instagram accounts to follow! 🙌🏻
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Once you’ve made it clear that I am not your choice, I will no longer continue to be one of your options. Why? Because chased love isn’t love. Forced love isn’t love. Manipulated love isn’t love. And I love myself too much to convince anyone to love me. ✌🏻
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Expecting to be treated well does not make you hard to love. Having boundaries does not make you hard to love. Refusing to settle for less than the best does not make you hard to love. It makes you a woman who knows what she’s worth.
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You can be independent, strong & confident & still dream about finding love. You can want it without needing it. You can wish for it without putting your life on hold to wait for it.
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“Maybe your happy ending doesn't include a guy. Maybe it's you, on your own, picking up the pieces and starting over. Freeing yourself up for something better in the future. Maybe the happy ending is just...moving on.”
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"There's so much more to life than finding someone who will want you...or being sad over someone who doesn't..."
http://t.co/XbL5eM0UFu
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Please stop tap dancing to get that man’s attention. Stop bending over backwards to make him see you. Stop texting him while he leaves you on read. STOP REMINDING HIM THAT YOU EXIST. If you have to fight to stay in his line of sight...he is not the man for you.
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You're only overlooked, rejected, & ignored by the ppl not meant to be in your life.
Let go in peace, look ahead in gratitude.
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Breathe. You are not too early, you are not too late...you are right on time. You are right where & when you need to be. There is no time limit on realizing your dreams, on finding love, on becoming the person you want to be. RELAX. Your life is unfolding just as it should. ❤️
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Two things you will never have to chase:
True friends and true love.
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I know things feel scary out there right now, but listen:
There is still hope.
There is still love.
There is still magic.
There is still faith.
There is still wonder.
There is still beauty.
There is still laughter.
Hang in there. We’re all in this together. 💕
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I am all the way done with negotiating my worth with men or really anyone for that matter. It took me 40 years to learn how to love myself properly...I’m not about to waste my time begging anyone else to love me. ✌🏻
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When it’s over, it’s over. Let it be over. Stop trying to resurrect it. Stop arguing with God about why you should still have it. Stop obsessing over what you could have done differently or better. You can’t turn the wrong one into the right one, no matter how hard you try.
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Love has not forgotten you. It hasn’t lost your address. God hasn’t forgotten you. Everything meant for you will come in His perfect time, in His perfect way.
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Anyone you have to shrink down for is not someone meant for you. The right one will encourage your smarts, your success, your growth.
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It’s really okay to silently remove yourself from a toxic situation. You don’t owe anyone an explanation more than you owe yourself your protected peace & mental health.
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The right one for you won't walk away, he won't leave, he won't be halfway in. He won’t make you feel like you’re too much or too little. He will stay, & he will match your effort & respect your boundaries, & most of all, he will love you, just as you are.
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You deserve someone who’s sure of you. Let go of anyone who keeps you guessing about their feelings for you. No more settling for halfway love, lukewarm love, or uncertain love. You deserve the same kind of love you’ve been giving and then some. ❤️
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You’re not really a complete person until you’ve spent some time alone...free, independent, needing nothing from no one, & learning to love yourself & celebrate your life for the beautiful, precious, magical gift that it is. So go find yourself...& let love find YOU.
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If you have to chase him, ladies, here’s the cold, hard truth: He doesn’t want to be caught. A man who truly wants to be with a woman will always be running TOWARD her, not away from her.
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A man who has made it clear he doesn’t want to be with you is unworthy of any further communication from you. Period. The best, most empowered thing you can do is let a man who has made it clear he’s moving on...go ahead and move on right outta your life.
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If your gut is telling you that someone isn’t right for you, they’re NOT right for you, no matter how great they might look on paper. When it’s right for you, you will know. And when it’s not – it’s time to go.
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The right one will come, & stay, without being asked, chased, or begged. You will never have to let go of your dignity and self respect in order to hold on to the right love. Only the wrong love will require that.
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Accept a closed door for the blessing that it is, for the protection that it is...& stop pounding on it. Whatever, & whoever, is behind it is not meant for you.
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